Thursday, March 18, 2010

Friends Wanted.......



One day after school Chris, Brandon and I were walking to the store and on the way home we ran into a 1st grade buddy of Brandon’s. He asked Bran where he had been and why he does not see him in school anymore. Brandon replied boldly that he was home schooled. The other boy said Oh and began to update Bran on all the “news” of our local elementary school. They talked for a moment and we resumed our journey home. As we walked Bran said to me, “Mom, I like being home schooled.” I knew that a “but” was soon to follow; you see I detected a note of sadness in Bran as he talked with his friend. He then said. “But I do not have any friends.” As my heart was breaking I reminded him that he had a lot of friends and cousins that he hangs out with often. You see along with having 12 nieces and nephews (From both sides of the family) we have 8 god children and host of very close friends who have children in Brandon’s age range (he just turned 8 by the way). But this is not what he meant because he only sees them on the weekend. He was saying that with the exception of his brother he has no other children to socialize with during the week. Brandon was trying to say that he was lonely.

Do you know how hard it is to hear your child express that he is lonely? It was heart wrenching partly because as a mother you don’t want your child to hurt in any way and partly because I felt the same way. I too was feeling alone and isolated in this new thing we were doing.

When I stopped working outside of the house I went through moments of isolation, but it did not last long. At various times I had friends who stayed home with their kids and we would talk and occasionally get together. At one time we had two cars and Brandon and I (it was just him at the time) would go to the mall and have lunch. Sometimes I would leave him, not by himself of course, duh! Anyway I would go out with a friend. Later when Christian came along I started to work part time instructing Early Childhood teachers. I would have trainings a couple of days and evenings throughout the week. I had sufficient adult interaction as well as time with the kids, things were good, until…Home schooling put both Brandon and I in the same position, isolated and seemingly friendless. Here we are closed off from the rest of the world forced to live a life of solitude (okay I know but haven’t you guessed by now that I have a flare for the dramatic). How could something good leave us with feelings of loneliness? What can we do to overcome this?

For Brandon the answer was simple get him involved in programs to interact with other kids during the week. There are so many activities available for children being homeschooled, plays, ballet, trips snowboarding and the list goes on. So what does he do you may ask. Well he was already in basketball and Cub Scouts and those are good but it did not really help the need for interaction throughout the day. You see basketball meet Friday evenings and Saturday mornings and Cub Scouts meet Thursday evenings, I put in a request to a local internet home school group which gave me a good lead on a coop in my area. That ended up being a dead end because the coop was filled to capacity, no room at the inn. Is this how Mary and Joseph felt? Probably not. Then the sky opened and from the heavens came a wondrous blessing that left me speechless. Me, speechless, yeah right. Seriously a letter came in the mail about classes, FREE classes I may add given by the program that we home school with. The times are perfect as well as the location. Brandon now takes an Acting and Musical Theater class, he too is a little on the dramatic side. He also takes a Visual Arts class. All three classes are held throughout the day and he is with kids his age who are also being home schooled. Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

So you may be wondering what about you? Well the solution for me is not so simple. To be honest I find myself waiting with baited breath for Brian’s arrival in the evening. I am excited when the weekend comes and at times I feel disappointed when Sunday comes to an end. I do at time feel isolated, not so much lonely anymore but just separated. And you know as I write this I realize that God calls on us to do things and at times he will separate us so He can perfect some things in us. So please do not feel bad for me because I am choosing to look at this time as a time of pruning and perfecting. He is transforming me into the person He can use from glory to glory. Is it good to have people around? Sure and I have people I can call on and spend time with when I really need a break.

I know I did not impart any great words of wisdom to you. And to those who may be going through what I am you may be saying is that it? Unfortunately that is all I have. I can however encourage you to try and find a bright side and I can offer prayer. So let’s pray.....

.....Father in Jesus’ name I thank You for another opportunity to come together. Thank You for every person reading this blog and every parent and grandparent who have taken the plunge to educate their children at home. Father as they go through this journey they may experience the feeling of isolation or even loneliness. Remind them, remind us that we are not alone, that You promised not to leave us nor forsake us. Help us to see this time as a time of restoring and perfecting. And Father I ask that You will send opportunities to gather with those who are in the same position as us. Help us to find avenues even for our children to be with other kids who are being home schooled. Thank You Father that You are concerned about all that concern us. You love us and care for us, thank You for Your eternal love in Jesus’ name Amen!



Hugs and Kisses,
Cheryl

Until we meet again on Thursday, April 1st, happy homeschooling!


Friday’s Blog: This will be Rita’s final blog with “The Kitchen Table. We will miss her great sense of humor and wisdom. Please stop by and say “Farewell.”

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