Stereotypes and Preconceived Ideas (Myth Busters and Myth Makers)

As a woman of color and an American, I have been exposed to many stereotypes and preconceived ideas about my race of people and my gender. Coming up, it was we were a shiftless and lazy bunch of folks. Today it’s…all young black men are thugs and uneducated and our young girls are welfare recipients and baby making factories. The problem is the “all”!

But not many get a free pass on some type of stereotype being tagged on them. I was raised in the city of Philadelphia, and I grew up thinking that all Italians were part of the mafia, now if that is not a stereotype, then I don’t know what is. I’ve also been tempted to stereotype French and Asian woman. Why? Because I have had such negative experiences with them and it would be easy to put “all” of them in one basket.

Stereotyping people leads to the pool of preconceived ideas and notions of who they are and what they are, whether true or not. 

Stereotype, verb: typecast, pigeonhole, conventionalize, and categorize label or tag.

Preconceived idea, an opinion formed beforehand, a personal belief or judgment that is not founded on proof or certainty.

My new roommate is Caucasian and I just knew she would enjoy the fact that I had such a great range of “white mainstream music”. But too my surprise, she likes to listen to “soul (black) mainstream music,” which she also thought I would like…LOL! I enjoy listening to Barry Manilow songs, and she really doesn’t like him that much. On the other hand, she likes music I grew up with but no longer care to listen to. Stereotypes and preconceived ideas happen all the time—even with friends.  

While shopping at an open market in Honduras, my daughter encountered the enthusiastic call and and shouts from a vendor. He had something she must come and see. Well, when she got to his stand, he proudly showed her watermelons. He was so excited because he just knew he had a sale, but the sad thing is…she can’t stand watermelon. LOL! Her initial thought was, he must have been watching old movies where we are stereotyped as people who only love watermelon and fried chicken. L

I had a friend who traveled extensively  all over the world  for her work, and she told me that American woman are perceived as sluts and very loose women in many countries and black men are gold wearing gangsters. Which comes from them watching American television shows and Hip Hop videos. And they have put us “all” in one basket.

It would be nice if this just happened in matters of the world, but Christians are stereotyped and many people have preconceived ideas about us and it is not for the good either.

There are so many reasons people perceive Christians as being flakes and nuts, that I don’t have time to cover them all. False prophets, and make-believe preachers who are fleecing the flock, people claiming to belong to Christ (for their own gain), hate groups covering themselves with the name of Jesus and the list goes on! But today I just want to focus on those of us who are truly of the Household of Faith. 

Over the years in ministry, I have encountered so many people who have such a bad taste in their mouths about Christians, especially the ones whose parents kept them in church All day on Sunday! Somewhere during that torture, they made a conscience decision, never to go to church again when they were old enough to say, "No more!". But it was also the hypocrisy they experienced that went along with it. And there are the ones who came to church looking for love and support, only to be wounded even the more. And too many to count are tired of being beaten up emotionally by the bible tooters. 

We picket abortion clinics, but shun the girl’s or women in our church who become pregnant out of wedlock. (And often spend more time gossiping about them then we do praising God for His goodness.) We throw big showers for the married ones we like, and shun the others. Oh, we can be so messy and it shows in the opinions of those in our everyday lives.

When you look at the life of Christ, he always had something to give—mostly love and compassion.  He healed, He fed, He raised folks from the dead, He forgave and then He dealt with their sin. Jesus didn’t browbeat people with their sin; in fact, his biggest problem was with the leaders of the church. I don’t see anywhere in the Bible where He called anyone expect them, “Vipers and whitewashed tombs!” And that was because they were abusing their positions.  God loves people, it is sin that He hates. But we sort of get that backwards.

It's our job to be myth busters! We are to be a light, not a joke or someone people run away from. 

When people meet us and spend time with us, they should see we are not stereotypical in anyway. They should see something different about us, because “Love” never fails.

Now I am not guiltless, by no means. I look back over my life and I can see where I missed the mark and left people with the wrong impression or reinforced the bad one they already had. But, like Paul says, “When I was a child, I spoke as a child; I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” (I Corinthians 13:11) I'm grownup now.

Sisters, we need to stop telling people in the world what they need to stop doing and what they are doing wrong. We have to be more like Jesus and offer them love, because in relationship, God opens doors for conversations that are good seeds and vast waterings.

No, maybe as individuals we will not be able to change the preconceived ideas of the masses, but all God asks of us is, "One person at a time!"

Jesus is our example of how we are to represent and He left us all the instruction we need. All we have to do is read it and make the decision to do what He commands of us. I don’t know about anyone else, but I remember my hay days of sin, and it wasn’t people telling what a sinner I was that drew me to Christ. No! It was the love and kindness of God exhibited through a co-worker and his wife.

How do the everyday people in your lives perceive you? Are you a myth buster or myth maker?

Until next week...

Blessings and Hugs,

Ponnie

Time!

Today is the 14^th anniversary of 911 and at sundown, we come to the end of the Shemitah year and the beginning of Elul 29. Now you might be wondering what exactly I am talking about and why have I put the two events together? And I can understand that because many Christians are not up on our “Jewish roots,” but it is important that we know what is going on and get prepared for what is to come.

Here is a clip “Rabbi Jonathan Cahn” from Tuesday’s broadcast on the 700 Club, please, please….please watch. Mystery of the Shemitah (click) This 20 minute segment is a short summation of the Shemitah, and will give you good information and something to really think about.

I have a few more chapters to read in The Mystery of the Shemitah, and I hope by time I post this blog I have finished. And I do suggest you get the book, because even if you only read the beginning, it will change your world and understanding about God and what His intent has always been, and it was never for the rich to get richer and the poor get poorer. And most of all, it has always been about our dependence on Him. Amen!

Sisters, things are about to change and not for the better.  You might ask, “What is it we can do?” Well, for starters, we can make sure we are in the “Will” of God! This is the safest place any of us can be right now. And we need to desperately pray for those we know who are not. I think we all know someone who claims to be a Christian but are not living a right life. We all probably know someone who was once on fire for the Lord, but now is lukewarm. And above all else, we all know people who are in danger of spending eternity in hell’s fire if they do not accept Christ as their Savior!

In Paul’s letter to the church of Corinth he advised them to judge themselves! Let us take his lead. Some of us already know what’s wrong, because we have made the decision to do things our way and not God’s way. But some of us have been lured into a false sense of “Everything is okay and I am fine with God.” But in truth you’re not.

Do you know that unforgiveness keeps us out of the will of God? I ask this because personally I think too many Believers for some strange reason do not know this. And I say that because so many of us refuse to forgive and let go. Disobedience period is a deal breaker for us in the Kingdom no matter how you slice it, but the refusal to agree with God to forgive—is a biggie. Why? Because like cancer it spreads (metastasis itself)! It affects how we filter everyday aspects of our lives, it causes us to involve others, and after awhile it turns into hate, which is the opposite of love. Unforgiveness is a nasty bugger.

But we can’t stop there; let’s talk about our idols (those things which come before God). They are a great downfall for us too. As we take time to judge ourselves, we should ask the Holy Spirit to reveal any idols we have erected and are blind to.

The new TV season is upon us and we are chomping at the bit for certain shows or sports events to return. Do you realize that TV can be an idol? Yup, because we can put TV shows before spending time with God. Ouch! I know I just stepped on a toe or two. In fact, I’m getting ready to make a few of you mad, but that’s okay if it will prompt you to stop and think.

The morning after Scandal, How to Get Away with Murder and Umpire broadcast, my Facebook feed is flooded with extensive commentary from women as they watch the show. And, from sisters who say, “Jesus is Lord” in their lives. Some even make it an event, “I got my wine, cheese and crackers!” I’ve even seen posts a day or two later, because it was set on the DVR. I am not trying to be the TV police, but all 3 of the above named shows (and I can name many more) are not what the Word says we are to be feeding off!

But not only that…these sisters give more praise (on Facebook) on a weekly bases to these show than they do God, Himself! And here lies your “idol”! How can we justify watching that which God has deemed sin, (He did not design sexual intimacy as something to be watched) and call it entertainment? We can’t if we don’t want to contaminate that which is good inside us.

Anything that gets more attention than God or reading the Word should be weighed as a possible idol in our lives. What is the first thing you do in the morning—check your phone—get on the internet—or read your Bible and spend time with God?

And I cannot leave out those of us who are watching porn, (in what we think is secret). God sees and the Holy Spirit is with you. Same goes for those of us who are fornicating or having adulterous affairs. I don’t care who you are…we are not in the “Will” of God when we practice sin. We do not get a free pass on, “Well God understands.”

Sisters, I beseech you (beg and plead with you) to be about the business of making sure you are in the “Will” of God and in the safety of Yeshua, the Messiah.

I am not trying to scare you, but I am warning you that NOW, (not tomorrow, not next week) is the time to get right with God, make sure your house is in order and diligently start seeking Him on behalf of the lukewarm, the prodigals and the lost.

Forgive, ask to be forgiven, reconcile with those you have been separated from over foolishness, and let go of any sin you are holding on too! The Blood of Jesus has set us FREE from sin—so just let go!

Do not allow another day to pass where you don’t read the Bible and spend quality time with God. It doesn’t matter what you have to do to make it happen…just do it girls. Your life could really depend on it. Amen!

Until next week...

Blessings and Hugs,

Ponnie

What's Your Reflection?

While skyping with my daughter Tovah (who’s teaching in Honduras), last Sunday her principle stopped by her classroom to drop off material for Monday. She skypes from her classroom because the Wi-Fi is much better and it also affords us the privacy for heartfelt conversations. Okay, let me get back to my original thought…I ended up meeting her principal!

At first when she asked if he would like to meet me, I immediately thanked God I had washed my hair and looked pretty good…LOL! But, I quickly found out that it was more important what I looked like through my daughter’s reflection of me to others, versus my physical appearance.

Her principle said the most wonderful things that every parent wants to hear about their kids. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, and I already know you are a great woman, just by the way you raised your daughter! She is very kind and sweet,” he said. Wow! No, it’s not the first time I’ve been complemented on the good job I’ve done with my girls, but for some reason it all came together for me in a new light.

My new roommate also shared that because of my daughter, she felt we would get along right away—and—we do! They have worked together the past four summers at Trader Joe’s and she always admired how sweet, kind and hardworking she was. “It had to come from somewhere?” she told me. And because of my daughter’s reflection of me, I got to move into a really nice place with a fantastic woman.

But sisters here is my Ah-ha moment—this is the way it is supposed to be with us as Believers and Followers of Christ!

When the Messiah walked this earth…He (was) the exact likeness of the unseen God [the visible representation of the invisible] (Colossians 1:15a Amp). Now that He is seated at the right hand of the Father—we are to be the visible representation of the invisible God. Amen!

We all feel good when complimented on our children, especially when it is the light and love of Christ that people are talking about, whether they realize it or not.

Tovah is becoming friends with the maid who cleans her classroom, because she often stays late to prep for the next day. The maid (let’s call her Maria) speaks very little English (but wants to learn) and Tovah is a little rusty on some of her conversational Spanish—so they help each other.

I’ve raised both of my daughters to be respectful of people and to be kind and generous. And last week Maria (who is a new convert to Christianity and on fire for Jesus), told Tovah she sees the love of Christ in her and she knew she was her sister! But she also went on to say, “There are many here who say they belong to Jesus, but they do not tell the truth, because I see no love in them.” And Maria speaks the truth, because some of the things my daughter has encountered from particular people there, would make one wonder if they really know Christ at all and this is a Christian Academy.

But the saddest part of all of this is—it is just too common place—period! Too many claim to be followers of the Messiah, but there lives don't lineup. 

As any parent, I am pleased to hear good things about my daughters that are a direct reflection on how they were raised, and yes it not only makes me feel good, but makes me look good to others. But on the flip side, we are disappointed and sad when we see or hear of our children doing wrong. And especially when they were raised to know and do better! Well guess what! The same goes for God.

How must He feel when we live so beneath our privilege of being daughters of the King?  Or when we beg Him for things He has already given us, through the Cross. 

I often wonder what it’s like for Jesus, as we read His words and instructions for living for Him, (I miss that most Bibles no longer print His words in red ink.) yet we pick and choose what we want to do? He says, "Forgive!" But we say, "Not today Lord!"

Maria is able to see the fakes from the real thing because she is studying and growing in the things of God. The world does not read the Bible, instead they read those of us who say we belong to Him—and they are not seeing the “love” of Christ as they should. God is not getting the glowing reviews our reflection of Him should bring. And as parents we can relate to the bad reports. And even if you are not a parent you can still relate to seeing someone you love not do as well as they could in Christ.

We have no control over what people do or say—but we can have control over how we respond or handle things. And our response should be the love of Christ. And yes, there a many times it is easier said than done, but since it is a command, it is most doable for sure.

The best place to start is, studying the Bible for ourselves. Front to back! Not picking and choosing what we want to believe or do, but all of it…the good, the easy, the hard, and the excruciatingly painful. All of it!

I love that technology allows me and Tovah to text each day, play Words with Friends, and have a face-to-face 2 hour skype date on Sundays with no extra cost to us. As a parent—I am thrilled we can do this! But you know what sisters—same goes for us spending daily and quality time with God, our Father. He is thrilled when it happens too!

There are no three steps or five keys to a better Christian life. There is only taking the time to cultivate and grow our relationship with God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit. That is all we need—Amen!

Thought for the day...do people see the reflection of Christ when they look at you? And if not...why?

Until next week...

Blessings and Hugs,

Ponnie