Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Wedding Anyone?



There is something in the Body of Christ that makes me sad, and that is how God’s single daughters are missing out on the good life, because they are so pressed to be a Sadie, “Married Lady.” When I say the “good life” I’m talking about the goodness that Jesus says He came to give us in John 10:10

Why is it that women (young and old) want to be married so badly? Over the years I have posed this question to so many single women I have actually lost count, and the reasons are varied, but there is a common thread for most. That common thread is that women are just in love with the “idea” of marriage. I say this because when I ask the question, “What is God’s perspective on women and marriage?” most don’t have a clue. The world’s view of love, happiness and marriage is all tangled up in fantasy lust, nonsense and pure sin. It looks nothing and I mean nothing like the reality of a union between a man and woman according to the Lord. For one, He doesn’t give you the luxury of “Falling in and out of Love with your spouse.” So you don’t stay married until the thrill is gone and have permission to find another thrill. His Good Book has nothing in it about, “I don’t love you anymore!” so that means its over. He says, love is an action word and you can’t pick and choose to love when you feel like it. He says you have to love your spouse even when he doesn’t help around the house, bathe the kids, be romantic, or pick up his dirty underwear. When you were courting and were just so in love and everything he did was perfect, no one could tell you his love of sports would make you feel neglected. But now you hate him and March Madness. Once the gown is clean and put away as a keepsake, and the honeymoon is over, all that is left is the every day reality of living through the commitment you made to God and him. If your union is not one that was made in heaven, it could surely turnout to be more like something that came from hell.

I wonder how many cumulative hours are wasted each day as God’s girls cry out to Him, “How long Lord, how long?” That is “How long do I have to wait to be married?” “How long before I find a husband”? “How long before I have kids?” “How LONG?!!” “God, are you there??”

Women are drawn to talk to me because of the anointing the Holy Spirit has given me in my ministry, and in a natural, comfortable and intimate setting women will often share with one another. And it is a rarity to meet a single woman who is satisfied with being single. A single woman who knows she has been called to be single for however long a season and is living life and having a ball. This should not be the rarity but the norm. Yet, God’s daughters are just hanging on until that husband, and missing opportunity after opportunity. Sisters, I pray that before 2010 is over that I have encouraged those of you who are not having the time of your life, to rethink, reassess and begin to reclaim what’s been slipping by you.

For starters, I want to clear up a common misconception among my single sisters, “You do not find a husband! He finds you!” Proverbs 18:22 says, A man who finds a wife, finds a good thing, and has favor from the Lord. Ooh, did you gals get that? I sure hope so. Also, Proverbs 19:14 tell us that “A prudent wife is a gift from God.” Wait a minute! It looks like these two scriptures are telling us that becoming someone’s wife is between God and the man. Yep, that is exactly what they are saying, so on that premise I’m going to encourage those of you who are begging God for a husband (or to be married) to stop it. Why? Because if you believe what the Bible says, then you will realize that begging God does not move Him, and if He is in charge of this marriage business, then why concern yourself with it? I’m saying this because I want my single sisters to be FREE!! It is something that too many of us are not, and it is a shame; and at times a “sin”. Yes, I said it, “Sin.” Whenever we are not content with our lives according to God’s will, we are in sin. When we have a loss of joy because we don’t have something we want, (not something that we need) we are telling God, that He doesn’t know what He is doing. But the reason so many women are discontented by not being married, is because in truth they don’t really believe God is in control. I know that seems harsh, but it is very true. And in order to live the good life, we must live it in truth.

I know that trusting in God is easier said than done. Walking in Faith and by Faith, from Faith to Faith, (no matter how you slice it) takes faith and determination. And according to Paul, there is also a fight involved. So, I don’t disregard those things that are stumbling blocks for God’s single daughters, and over the next few months that is what we will be talking about, those stumbling blocks that cause us to rush ahead of God, be upset with Him and just generally miss out on so much He has for us.

If you are a woman who has been secretly pressuring God or even becoming impatient with God about getting married, then I would like you to spend the next two weeks meditating on Proverbs 18:22 and 19:14. Delve into them and pray about what they really mean versus what is in your heart. As you begin to get understanding it will help you to see that God has a plan and just maybe you haven’t gotten onboard with Him and His desires for you. In the next few months we will take a look at what it means to be lonely, looking for a better lifestyle, wanting children, feeling incomplete, wanting a license to have legal sex, being somebody, how come God doesn’t love me enough to give me a husband, and many other issues that blind and hinder single women from living their lives to the fullest every day.

I have one more thing to say before I go, and that is every woman is going to be single at some point in her life, and that is a good thing because there is purpose in your singleness. The world says life is not good unless you are hooked up with someone. But then again what would we expect; from a world that always goes against that which God has deemed to be good. Just as God setup marriage between a man and a woman, He has also setup and put into place the position of being single. Whether it is for a season or for all your days on this earth, God has deemed it good.

Take my challenge single Daughters of the Most High, and make the decision that your life as a single woman is wonderful and fulfilling God’s plan and purpose for your life.

See you in 2 weeks.

Love & Hugs
Ponnie

My next blog: Wednesday, January 20th.

Thursday's blog: Cheryl Mackey, "Diary of a Homeschooling Mom"

2 comments:

Rita said...

Hey Ponnie. Thanks so much for this. I think the "being inl ove with the idea of marriage" hits the nail on the head. May single ladies read this and be encouraged! Blessings!

Maria Guzman said...

Good one Ponnie!

Continue to encourage the single ladies out there that need the words of wisdom before taking the next steps of life.