Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Wait! I Only Have Two Hands.


Anyone who is a parent whether single or married can relate to the struggles of balancing all of life’s needs. As a single parent of three, I struggle everyday to balance my children’s needs and my needs. Imagine a mountain with little ole’ me at the bottom being overtaken by an avalanche of needs. This is my life every day. My 11 year Zoe is very self sufficient but still needs attention, help with her homework or just wants to talk. The latter usually occurs right as I walk through the door before I’ve had a chance to decompress. If she does not get that attention she acts out in ways that is not only bad for her but further tests both my limits and my sanity. My soon to be 5 year old Christina is growing more and more independent every day. She doesn’t want my help getting dressed; “I can do it” is a phrase I hear quite often. She has a younger sister to play with so that takes up a lot of her time. But Tina often just wants to sit with me or just wants a hug and a kiss. Did I mention that she usually wants this while I’m sitting in the tub? I’m convinced that she only does this to soften me up so that I will give her access to my bubbles. Then there is my 2 ½ year old Amaia-Joi (AJ), what can I say about her. If she did not have her father’s features I would swear that she was switched at birth. There is not enough cheese in all of Wisconsin to go with all of the whine that I am subjected to on a daily basis. She whines and cries about everything. She is a very needy child and is still at the age where she wants to constantly be under me. I’m still working on potty training also which is very frustrating considering that my other two were both potty trained by the age of 2.

Notice I did not discuss my needs; that is usually because they don’t get addressed. I shop for myself maybe twice a year. It’s been about 6 months since I’ve gotten my hair done and I usually treat myself to a movie or a day out about once every 2 months. The biggest need in my life that doesn’t get addressed as they should, are my spiritual needs. I know that my prayer life and the time I spend with God are nowhere near where they should be. God instructs us that, “For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened” (Matthew 7:8 NKJV). Many days I find that I am too tired to knock on His door. Many days I find I do a lousy job at balancing the kids, work, and school and tending to my spiritual needs. This became magnified after I had my 3rd child. I don’t mean to sound down on myself and my abilities to juggle life’s duties; there is a bright spot in all of this. I have learned the importance of having a personal relationship with Christ. I would box Him into an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening but I have learned the importance of incorporating Him into all aspects of my life.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 instructs us to pray without ceasing. Now I know we can’t pray all day long but for me this scripture means every moment that we have we should be in constant communication with Him. So I will talk to Him in my car on the way to work, during quiet times throughout the day. This keeps me in constant contact with him. When I don’t do this I feel distant and disconnected and this leaves me ill prepared to handle life’s challenges and everyone’s needs. I know that this is only one season in my life and that my children will grow older and require less of me (I’ve already prepared in my mind the blog that I will write 8 years from now about how I am no longer needed). However I will use this season to continue to learn how to include God in my entire life and not box Him into spare moments. When I limit Him I limit myself and that is something I don’t want to do. I would rather experience the abundant life He has for me and I won’t find it in one hour in the morning or at night.




Peace & Love
Michele

I'll be back to share with you on, Wednesday, January 27th.

Thursday's Blog: We have a new member joining "The Kitchen Table" and her bio will be tomorrow's post...please stop by to meet this super sister!

5 comments:

Rita said...

I'm praying for you as you balance the needs of not only your children but yours also. I know women will be blest as they read what you have shared. Can't wait for your next post! Great job!

Tovah said...

You rock sis!

Unknown said...

Michelle,

Your issue of balancing life is an issue I believe is for every mom. Thank you for sharing. I believe mothers in any state of life will b able to relate, I know I do.

Cheryl

RISE777 said...

OH my friend,
I can relate to what you are saying so very well. It is hard for any mother But I can only imagine how hard it is for a single mother to have any balance in life. I will pray for you as you deal with life head on and beat the odds.

Maria Guzman said...

Michelle,

Thank you for sharing. As a mom, sometimes we forget ourselves and focus on the children, but I've come to realize that we are not the energizer bunny. We also need to have "me time" and recharge.

I agree with Cheryl on this, I can relate as well. Maria