My Plate Is Too Full!

I don’t remember using the phrase “My plate is full” until I became a Christian. I remember having plenty of time for me and the things that I liked to do before that. I started filling up my evenings with Bible Study, homework for Bible Study, going to different Women’s functions and then ministry work…phew! All of a sudden, “My plate was full!” And I loved it!! No complaints here. Well, not for awhile that is. But as time went on, I was asked to do more and more, and then all that joy and enthusiasm I had, began to turn to resentment and looked nothing like a labor of love. Of course as my mentor helped me to see, it was all my doing and no one else’s.

Yesterday Sasha talked about being tired and if you read between the lines, her plate seems to be piled high. So full to the point, she is not getting the sleep she needs. Not the sleep she wants, but the sleep her body demands. The truth is 4 or 5 hours of sleep a day is not enough to sustain the body, so she is not meeting her body’s requirement at all. Her blog made me think about what goes on in life that we find ourselves in such predicaments? Tired, and out of sorts.

We all experience seasons in our lives were we might lose sleep, and I think one of the biggest is motherhood. A newborn brings great joy to the family when it arrives, but one thing that is a given for all of them—they don’t sleep much. Their tiny little stomachs can only hold but so much milk, so they often feed every couple of hours or so. So sleep depravity is something all new parents experience. And it can get worse if you have to go back to a full time job outside of the home, or have other children to care for. But the good thing is, it does pass and kids do begin to sleep longer hours in between feedings, and then one wonderful day—they start sleeping through the night! We are anointed to be able to make it through those seasons. But just think if you had to do that type of schedule for say 5 years. I doubt we would make it.

There are other times in our lives when we don’t get much sleep. Mothering of young children and sick kids are defiantly on the top of the list and also caring for an elderly parent, or spouse. Being the caregiver of children with disabilities or who are fighting devastating diseases. If you talk to any doctor they will tell you that a lack of sleep was the norm, during their residency years. And we can’t forget the college student with mid terms and finals. The good thing is that all of these times are but for a season and I believe have a special anointing to see us through. But then there are those times that we fill up our plates without the wisdom or guidance of the Lord. And that is when we get into trouble.

When I found myself in a place where my plate “was too full” I didn’t know how to change that. Reason being, I thought I couldn’t say, “No” to anything. I thought I had to prove how much I was a good Christian, good mother, and great employee. I was driven and a works person. And you know what, a lot of us are—especially women.

As women, we have the tendency to over compensate in what we do at church, on the job, and at home. We must do it all, no matter the cost. Well, sisters I want to share with you, that’s sort of crazy thinking on our part. And the reason I say that is, because what it might cost is way too much. For one, when our plates are full and piled up with things to do, most often it cost us our time with the Lord. That is to high a price to pay if you really sit down and think about it.

Over the years I have learned to not be driven. I no longer have anything to prove to anyone. This change of mindset came about the more I began to realize who I was in the Messiah. Who God made me to be and what He expects from me and not what people thought I should do or be. God doesn’t put us in positions where He has not made provision. So, if you are in a situation that your plate is so full that life is not good, I do suggest you sit down and take a good look at everything that is on it. Look at each thing individually and ask yourself, “Why is this here?” You might be surprised at the answer?

For one, you have to see if everything you are doing is what you are supposed to be doing at this time. And if so, are you doing it “in your strength” or in the “strength of the Lord?” Are there things that you need to let go of or cut back on? Or is it just that you need to manage your time better and be more organized? These are question you should ask yourself and God.

One thing about a driven personality that really hinders us—we like to do it on our own, and then pray and ask God to help us make it through. We have a tendency to set everything up “on our own” and then as we become overwhelmed we start seeking God for help; when in fact we should seek God first. Also another really big part of the driven personality—Pride! Yeah, pride is a biggie, and one of our greatest downfalls. Because we have to “prove” and do it on “our own” pride sets us up big time. I have lived in this house, so I speak from great experience. So if you have a driven personality or you are one that sees your self-worth through what you do, then as you sit and look at the things on your plate, make sure to ask yourself “Is pride involved here?”

When life is overwhelming and you are not getting the rest and quiet time you need, it’s time to take a hard look at what's going on in your life. If you have so much to do and no time for God, then something is really amiss and change needs to be made—immediately. There are times in our lives when God will ask something big of us, but no matter what He asks, big or small, He always makes provision for us to succeed. He never sets us up to fail and not have time for Him.

For all you sisters out there who are tired and overwhelmed, STOP what you’re doing and find out why? Did God give you an assignment and you ran ahead of Him and set it up on your own? Did He give you an assignment and you are trying to do that while still holding on to things that you must let go of? What’s up?! There are always special circumstances and seasons in our lives when things might be turned upside down for a minute, but I’m talking about our mindsets and every day regular life here.

Just as a person who is trying to eat a daily diet of healthy foods in order to feel better and live longer, and watches what they put on their plates to eat, so should we spiritually. To sustain a healthy lifestyle we are told to eat something live every day, such as raw veggies and fruits. Our daily plate of life should always have the living Word of God. Just as lean proteins give us energy and build up muscle, so do prayer and our faith sustain and build our spiritual muscles. At a buffet you would look at your plate to make sure you have enough of the right foods. Well, the same goes for the plate of life, we should make sure it is filled with that which will sustain us spiritually and emotionally.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Wednesday's Blog: "Encouragement for single sisters to make change"

I'm TIRED!

Every couple of weeks, I try to bring you health or beauty issues that relate specifically to women. Usually, I don’t have a problem finding something to write about, but this month I struggled. Not that there isn’t anything that isn’t health relevant to discuss...for example, I could have easily blogged about it being Diabetes Month and brought some helpful information about the deadly and disabling disease—however, I am not!

The truth is I struggled with writing the blog this month because I have been simply to TIRED to think or do anything!!!!

As many of you may already know, I am a work-at-home mom who recently began homeschooling my 12 year old, 7th grade, daughter this fall. In order to accommodate this new venture, I changed my work schedule. God granted me the wonderful opportunity to work from home in 2008 and this past September, I made the decision to work during the night hours so I could not only teach my daughter but have more family time during the day. My work leadership allowed me to change my hours of work to 8pm - 4am, Monday-Friday. By working these hours, I am able to make sure my son gets up and out the door before he goes to school, get a few hours (very few) worth of sleep before I begin my day again around 9 am. My day is nonstop until I finally crash at 4am the next morning—with very little downtime. So most days, I get about 4-5 hours worth of sleep. Basically the plan has been pretty good.

However, I started noticing a few weeks into my schedule that my memory was beginning to slip. I began to forget simple tasks (like deadlines for this blog) and as time went on, I struggled constantly with fogginess and it became harder and harder to concentrate or remember anything. Next came the irritability which was followed by what I quickly identified as depression. I had no energy, constant body aches and pain, and I even began to pick up weight. It felt like I was constantly letting down family and friends because of my failure to meet my commitments or because I was too tired to talk or interact with them. I felt like I was going downhill fast. Honestly, originally I thought I was going through early menopause…LOL!

One day, the light bulb went on, “Girl, this isn’t menopause! The problem is you aren’t getting enough sleep!”

Sleep Deprivation is such a serious condition that it has it’s own website, (yep, found it during a google search) According to the site, “Sleep deprivation can have serious effects on your health in the form of physical and mental impairments.” Several of the “symptoms” that I was experiencing were listed as side effects of not getting enough sleep. The site goes on to say that lack of sleep can even be fatal! Check it out; there is some interesting information on there.
www.SleepDeprivation.com

As women, we tend to deprive ourselves of one of the most precious gifts that God has given us, the gift of SLEEP! I am willing to bet that there is not one of us who hasn’t sacrificed sleep to make sure that household chores are done, to stand watch over a sick child, and or meet the many other obligations and commitments we have outside the home. I think we are all guilty of trying to be superwoman at one time or another. As women, we will wear ourselves thin and often sacrifice our sleep in the process.

While writing this blog, I felt prompted to say something to the single mom’s out there who are struggling to keep it together and who are quite frankly, just TIRED. Don’t lose hope that things will change. As our children grow and become more independent many things do get easier. God hears our prayers and He sees our tears. Continue to trust in the Lord to get you through this season of your life. Stay encouraged!

I am still trying to figure out how to have a better work/life balance and I’m working on getting more sleep. I try to schedule naps throughout the day, even if it is just a 30 minute power nap. On the weekend, I am learning as well that it is okay to retreat to my bedroom and take a LONNNNGGG nap without feeling guilty about it. I'm still struggling with the side effects from lack of sleep, but hopefully I will see a change soon from incorporating these small changes.

Pray for me! ~smile~



Be blessed Sisters!
Sasha


Tuesday's Blog: Encouragement!

FREEDOM!

We are rerunning Pat Betters 3 part series “Freedom” for the next 3 Fridays. It seems so appropriate since we are in a season where we can become entangled with the things we have been freed from, or in some cases we still need to realize what our freedom is. Many of us are being pulled into the worlds system of this season, and if “The Kitchen Table” can encourage you to be free then we have accomplished the mission that the Lord has given us.


Galatians 5:1 (Complete Jewish Bible), What the Messiah has freed us for is freedom! Therefore, stand firm, and don’t let yourselves be tied up again to a yoke of slavery.

What the Messiah has freed us for is freedom—what does this mean? What kind of freedom is the Bible talking about? We know that depending where you live, who you are, what race you are, what gender you are, how much money you have, who your parents are, and how you look, may afford you certain freedoms that others do not have. The Bible couldn’t be referring to these types of freedoms because if the Messiah freed us, then it is available to all who believe in Him no matter what your social status or life circumstances. So what is this “freedom” we have been given?

Well, for starters, He has set us free in ways that life circumstances cannot take it away. We are free to forgive others even when they mistreat us, lie on us, steal from us and do unthinkable and heinous things to us. We are free from the opinions of others and we are free to walk in love when by most standards we should be crying for revenge.

In the many years of teaching Women’s Bible Study and studying the Word myself, I have found that we read scripture and say, “Amen,” but half the time we don’t understand or have a clue as to what we just read. We don’t think about scripture and meditate on it as the Bible instructs us to do. We like to push the “easy button” and let someone else tell us what scripture means. As God’s children, we are lazy when it comes to spending time in His “Book of Instruction”. Reading something and meditating on it are two completely different entities and I think that is where a lot of confusion comes for God’s people. I hear all the time how women make time in the morning to read their devotions (now this is a good thing), but often that is it for the day, and that’s the bad part. You read a devotional but you did not spend time the Word of God on your own. Time was not taken to dissect what you read, investigate and meditate on it. That is the difference between reading and studying. Even in school, if you read your assignment, but don’t really think about the meaning of what you are reading and how it pertains to the subject matter itself, you will not do well on any papers you must write or test you take. Why? You just read the content, but didn’t spend time thinking about what you were reading.

Sisters, I want you to spend time thinking about what is this “Freedom” the Messiah has given you? How are you free and how does this “freedom” affect your life on a daily bases? What does it really mean, “the Messiah has freed us for Freedom?”



Be blessed,
Pat

I will return Friday, December 3rd, with Part II of "Freedom"!
Hope to see you then.


Monday's Blog: Sasha "Healthy Lifestyles"

HAVE A WONDERFUL!!!

Today is the American holiday Thanksgiving. And though I don’t do the traditional feast and try to be thankful every day, I do enjoy the day off. So sorry, no blog today, but God willing we will be back tomorrow!



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Friday's Blog: "Encouragement"

Enjoy!!

Sometimes we just have to makeup our minds that we are going to enjoy life! Yes, some days it is just that simple for many of us.

As single women we need to make decisions that will ensure a better perspective on what we have to work with versus what we don’t have. We live in a time where women have many great opportunities compared to as little as 30 years ago. This day of technology has opened up many doors for us, and education wise the sky is the limit. It is common place for women over 35 to go back to college to start a new career. We are buying our own homes, income properties, cars, adopting children, traveling, presidents and CEO’s of our own businesses and nonprofits. We have it going on! Well, in a sense we do, because with all that some of us have, we are still not enjoying life, because we are still focused on what we don’t have.

I love to read, and I very seldom borrow library books for myself, because I read in bed a lot and some of the jacket covers are not the cleanest. I know, I know… that is my phobia. LOL!! So, I buy a lot of books, and I also by “Used Like New” from 3rd parties through Amazon and other used book sites. But even with all the great deals I find, I found myself not able to purchase a book I wanted a couple of weeks ago. What! I always have a book to pickup. In fact I have started using reading as a distraction when I feel stressed and want to eat. I pick up my book and read a chapter. It really has worked. So, the thought of not having a book to read, was a little scary. That would mean that I had to go through “book” withdrawal. Okay, so maybe I am stretching it a bit, but I read just about every day. But what this forced me to do was look at what I had, and you know what? I had a couple of books that were given to me that I haven’t read and a couple of books I picked up from the discounted bin at my local bookstore. I just finished one of those books and it was pretty good. My point being, I was getting nervous because I didn’t have the money to buy the next book on my list I wanted to read. But all along, I had something good that I had overlooked, forgotten about and taken for granted. Does this sound familiar? It may not be a book for you, it might be that you desire to be married, therefore you are not looking at what you have, but are focused on the fact that you are not married and there are no prospects. Maybe you want a new car, even though your car runs good and serves you well. It could be that you’ve had to cut your clothing allowance down or even out for this season, yet you have a closet full of clothes.

Sisters, make the decision that you are going to enjoy what you have and where you are as much as possible. Make changes where you have that option. But there are many things in life that we must wait upon the Lord for, and as we wait, we should not be sad, disheartened and lonely. We should be enjoying all that we have every single day that we have it. And really all we need is an attitude shift. A shift from an attitude of wanting to one of gratefulness for what we already are blessed with.

Enjoy: to have or use with joy; be happy with; take pleasure in. This is what we should be doing with our lives, taking pleasure in what we have, being happy with God’s greatness in what He has done for us, and live each day with joy.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

We are taking Thursday off for the American holiday, "Thanksgiving"

Friday's Blog: "Encouragement for all!"

So, What About Tuesday?

It often amazes me how our mindsets and attitudes dictate so much to us. Just take a look at how most of us view Friday versus Monday. I sometimes wonder how often the catch phrase “TGIF” (Thank God It’s Friday) is spoken, written, blogged, tweeted and texted every Friday. But I guess the good part of it is, we do have a slew of people thanking God for Friday, even those who don’t serve Him. ~Smile~ And on Mondays, you hear so many complaints. Oh, it’s Monday already?” “Why can’t we have two Sundays?” “I hate Monday!”

Wow, what a big difference 3 little days makes.

But what about Tuesday? How do we feel about Tuesday? I know that we pay homage to Wednesday, “Hump Day” because it is the middle of the basic workweek. But what about Tuesday? What would life be like if we had the same vim and vigor each workday that we do for Friday? What if on Mondays we jumped out of bed rearing to go like we do on a Friday payday? Do you think that is possible? I hear some of you moaning already...LOL! But I’m serious, how would that impact our lives?

I know that this is short work week for a lot of people in the USA, because of the Thanksgiving Day holiday. Some of us will have a 4 day weekend, so to speak. Thursday will seem like Sunday, Friday and Saturday both will seem like Saturday and then Sunday. We will be all confused about the days, but still enjoying having so many days off. But then will come Monday, and we are going to start wishing we had just one more day off. We are so fickled aren’t we? ~Smile~ But do you see how it is all in our mind? We make choices about how we view our days before they even come to us. Some of us start dreading Monday, Sunday evening. When you really sit down and think about that, we are negating the time that we are actually living in for a time that may not come. Hum, does that make sense?

I guess the point I’m trying to make is, if we viewed each workday with a grateful heart then there would not be dread, whining, and complaining. We would not spend precious time wishing our lives away. I see Facebook postings on Monday such as, “Why can’t it be Friday?” If that were so, you would have missed living Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. That is wishing your life away. I think today’s picture says it all…

If you have a job, be very grateful to God that Monday comes, because there are many who would love to have your job if you really don’t want it. If you are attending college, be grateful for the privilege and don’t complain because on Monday, you have exams. Didn’t you know that was part of being a college student? Then why complain about the days you have tougher classes or exams. If you are a stay-at-home mom, don’t complain about Monday because it starts off the school week and all the different things you have to do for the family. If you are blessed to have a car to take the kids to school, practice, rehearsals, and run your errands; be very grateful for that, because there are people who have lost their homes and now live in their cars with their kids.

We have the power to make our days better in many ways. For one, a grateful heart really helps to change our perspective. It helps us to find the good versus expect the negative. It helps us fight off depression and sadness about the things in our day that we desire to be different. It keeps us more centered on God and His goodness.

So, what about Tuesday—today? Are you wishing it away because you want Thursday or Friday to hurry up and get here? Or are you going to live today and enjoy it?

Try having a Friday attitude every day, and see what it does for your workweek!



Love & Hugs
Ponnie


Wednesday's Blog: "Single and Love It!"

WHAT IF?

It just dawned on me the other day that all year we have been writing about what to do with your money and being a good steward, which is a good thing. But!!! What if you don’t have any money to put in the bank? What if you are experiencing your utilities being cut off? What if your unemployment compensation is running out and you have no other source of income? What if your rent or mortgage has gone up and you don’t have the extra money? What if you’ve lost your job and are in your 50’s? What if your retirement fund went out the window last year? What if your husband has left you and the kids high and dry? What if you’re in debt so bad, you feel as though you are drowning. What if you are now standing in food bank lines in order to feed your family? What if, what if, WHAT IF???? What if you are beginning to think that God doesn’t love you? What if you feel He cares for others more than you? What if…you feel like giving up on the world and God. What if you see no way out? What if?

The world economy is experiencing some very trying times and it has affected just about everyone in someone way or another. My 17 year old has even seen a big decline in her babysitting jobs the past few months. She was booked almost every weekend with at least one job, but most weekends she had two. Now if she gets two gigs a month she is doing good. People are not going out as much as they used to and therefore they don’t need babysitters.

Going to the movies which is one of the great American pastimes cost a family of four around $30.00 just to get into the movie. And that price is for a matinee and searching for a good price, because depending on the movie house it could be almost $40.00. And that is without purchasing anything to eat. Times are tight all around and it’s hard to watch a TV program or read articles on how to manage your money when there is none to manage. So, today I would like to spend a few minutes trying to encourage you if you are finding yourself in that place.

Hard times come basically in two ways. Our own poor decisions or they just happen. Some of us are in financial trouble because of things we did that have put us there. Not paying our bills when we had the money, refinancing our homes to get extra money and buying things we really didn’t need, but just wanted. Using credit cards as if they were free money, with little regard to the fact that we would have to pay the bills eventually. Not living within our means, never saving and living from paycheck-to-paycheck because we were wasteful. I myself have been guilty of many poor decisions in my life when it came to my finances. I often think about all the money I have wasted over the years (and not having anything to show for it) and what I would have now if I had saved and put money into an IRA account for myself.

There are also other ways we get ourselves into trouble, and that’s not being obedient to God’s Word or waiting on Him. But then things just happen that we have no control over and we did nothing to bring these hard times into our lives. And sometimes that is the hardest scenario to withstand. But nonetheless, we must.

At age 39 I found myself, pregnant and alone. I was a baby Christian at the time and really didn’t know God that well. I knew of Him, but I didn’t know Him and His ways. So, when I found myself in that predicament, I didn’t think He would help me. But He proved me wrong. I could no longer do my job, (assistant manager at a retail store) because of the long hours and I had a high risk pregnancy. I’m going to have to give you the condensed “Readers Digest” version. I did get another job, making half of what I was making in retail, was sick and hospitalized off and on (if I didn’t work, I didn’t get paid) had a preterm baby, lost that job had to go on welfare couldn’t pay my rent and was facing eviction. Now these were all consequences of my sin. But God had asked me to trust Him and not get an abortion, and I had agreed. But trust me when I tell you, it looked as though He had abandoned me, most days.

Just when I had resigned to the possibility of going into a shelter, a miracle happened. I received a phone call concerning an apartment through the HUD program and I hadn’t even signed up for it. My sister had been on new job for only 2 weeks and an opportunity opened up where I qualified for an apartment that I would be able to afford. I had to sign everything without seeing the apartment, and within a few weeks I was moving into this amazingly beautiful apartment. My 17 year old was 4 months old at the time and we lived there for 12 years. I was able to homeschool her and only work part-time and still pay my rent and other bills.

After leaving that apartment to move into one that was better suited for homeschooling and much larger, my landlady stopped paying her mortgage and she lost our home to a Sheriff Sale. She continued to collect my rent without telling me what was going on. And I found myself in a desperate situation of having no place to live. Now what happened here was not my fault and I hadn’t done anything for me to lose my home, since my rent was paid faithfully every month. But even so, I had to move in with a young couple from my church for several months and then with my oldest daughter. I was displaced for a little over a year and a half. It was not fun being in my 50’s and living with others and losing all that I had. But at the end of those long 18 months, I was blessed to move into a house that had just been completely renovated. Everything was new and I even have a Jacuzzi bathtub! I’ve been here for 3 ½ years.

The point I am trying to make is that God is true to His Word. And no matter what you are going through He has not forsaken you, even if it is your fault. God had His reasons as to why when it wasn’t my fault I had to endure the hardship that I did. I found myself living in a place that was very depressing and wondering why God? Why? But of course hindsight is 20/20 and He used that time in my life to burn off the dross, and grow more in His ways. I got to see both ends of the spectrum that Paul talks about in Philippians 4:12 (NIV) when he tells us how he learned the secret to being content in having and in not having, and that we can endure all things through Christ the Messiah.

Hard times do come in life, they are part of the trials and tribulations the Messiah warns us we will encounter, but He also admonishes us to be of a good cheer for He has taken care of it.

You may be feeling pretty low about life right now, but I want you to remember that God is faithful in taking care of His own. It may not come the way you would like it, but His provision does come. Of course most of us would much rather work and pay our bills and have money to buy food, versus standing in food lines or having an agency dig into our personal lives in order to help us have fuel for the winter or pay our rent or mortgage. But it really doesn’t matter how our needs are being met, as long as they are. Maybe you would like to take your kids to the movies, but you can’t, but I’m sure you have much to be grateful for. If you are able to read this blog online, that is a blessing in itself.

Sisters, I don’t want you to feed into the lies of our enemy. No matter what your circumstances may be, God does love you. He loves you whether your circumstances are the consequences of your sin or poor decisions and He loves you if they are not. Job did nothing but be a man that God could trust to withstand the test. Don’t give up on God and His love for you. You must continue to “Fight the good fight of the faith!”

Ladies, if there is someone you know who is having a hard time, please help them if you can. The past couple of months I have been blessed by the generosity and love of my sisters who have helped me and Tovah. It is not the first time and it may not be the last. But I too have helped many over the years. That is what we are supposed to do. Even if you don’t have much yourself, please share and or ask some of your friends and family to pitch in and help you help someone.

Jesus says, “The world will know that you are mine, by the way you love one another.
John 13:35 [my paraphrase]



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Tuesday's Blog: "Encouragement”

“Something” Is Better Than “Nothing”!

Unrealistic expectations set us up to fail all the time. How many of us made New Years resolutions on January 1, 2010 and did not see them through? Yup, just as I thought, way too many! Mostly we do this every year because the world has so much hype about it. We get caught up and carried away. Not really thinking through a plan of action that makes sense. Just as the Christmas shopping season is the make it or break it money time for retail, so is January for weight loss centers, gym memberships and exercise equipment. It is their biggest money making time of the year. Why is that? Because so many Americans (ranked #1 as the most overweight country in the world) decides it is time to lose weight and get fit. That is a good thing, but the problem is the way we approach it...Hype, hype, HYPE!!!

As a Believer we should approach our issues and problems from the standpoint of trying to get to the root cause of the problem. Excessive weight (if not due from medications or a medical condition) is a symptom of a larger problem. Women overeat for different reasons, but there is still an underling problem or root cause.

Setting a certain number of pounds we want to lose in a certain amount of time can be defeatist from the very beginning. And the reason I say that is because it doesn’t look at what has brought us to the place of being overweight. It was a lifestyle of something that helped us put on the weight and it will be a lifestyle change that will help us get it off and keep it off.

Setting goals: Let’s make our first goal, “We will no longer overeat!” So what does that entail? Counting calories, counting fiber, cutting out or cutting down on sugar, eating smaller portions, and ditching junk food and take out? No longer overeating is going to mean something different to each of us, but it is a good place to start in the natural. Spiritually we should be praying and seeking God as to why we are using food in a way that is not healthy.

I’ve found that single women without children, young children or only one child, have a tendency to eat takeout more than cook. They often opt to buy lunch versus pack a healthy meal from home and pickup food (a few times a week) on the way home for dinner instead of cooking. This is not only expensive but also not the healthiest of lifestyles. So this would mean they would have to come up with a plan for healthier meals. Picking up a roasted chicken from the market is easy and inexpensive and adding a fresh salad, steamed veggies a little pasta or baked sweet potato is an excellent meal and you still don’t have to cook a lot. Baking fish is quick and easy; add a salad and small whole grain dinner roll and you’ve had a great heart healthy meal. Cooking for one or two can have its challenges, but there are websites with all type of suggestions and quick recipes.

Women who have husbands and families find it very challenging to eat differently without cooking two separate meals and that can become a drag and expensive after awhile. But there is hope for you too sisters, you just have to do your research and network to come up with healthier low fat , whole grain, flavorful meals that you and your family both will enjoy. Thank God for the “World Wide Web” and great cook books!

If you are one who doesn’t like to cook, then prayer to help you overcome that is needed, because the best and healthiest foods will come out of our own kitchens.

Making change is usually never easy, but a must in this life we live. So once you can begin to see that it has become easier to not eat after a certain time of night, or that you are not craving something sweet all the time and you’ve replaced mindless eating with something productive, then it is time to add another layer to your new lifestyle. Physical activity is a must for better overall health. Walking does wonders for you and if that is all you are able to do then do that. Everyone can’t afford a gym membership (and even when we can they often go to waste) but most of us can walk. Zumba (dance) classes run around $5.00 per class and that might be an option for you once you build up your stamina. If you are having problems with your knees or joints, look into water aerobic classes.

Sisters, doing one or two things slowly is better than doing nothing at all, which is usually where we end up a month or so after our great New Years resolution to do it all in one big swoop. We peter our and give up. But we can avoid that this time if our approach is different.

If our goal is to get healthy spiritually, mentally and physically, then the weight loss becomes the gravy of it all, not the heart. Finding out why we do the things we do that are not good for us is very important in living the good life that the Messiah died for us to have. Taking one step and one day at a time, most often reaps the best benefits in life.

So don’t put expectations on yourself that you cannot keep and set yourself up to fail. Start with prayer and the desire to change that which hinders you, in your relationship with God and others. And then just take it one day at a time with the Holy Spirit guiding you along the way.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Monday's Blog: "Encouragement on our Finances or Lack of!”

Let's Play Hooky!!!

Did you ever play hooky when you were younger? I did once, and of course I got caught. I was in 9th grade (Junior High) and I wanted to see my best friend who had tired to commit suicide over the weekend. My mother forbade me to go because she was in the psychiatric ward of the city hospital. But being the determined teenager that I was, I called my friend’s mother and told her it was okay with my mom. Well, to make a long story short, my sister had her tonsils taken out that day and my mother called my school to have them tell me to go to my aunt’s house when they informed her I had not shown up. It turned into a real nightmare and that is a story for another time, but “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” it wasn’t. But yes, I did get to see my dear friend!

I went to boarding school for High School and the best you could do was pretend you were sick. But that really wasn’t any fun because we didn’t have computers or lap tops back then and it wasn’t likely you were going to get to watch TV in the rec room; so your only option was to stay in bed and read. I never pretended to be sick, it was just too boring. To me playing “hooky” should be fun or have purpose to it. And since I never got to enjoy it during my school years, I made sure in homeschooling we did!

In my second year of homeschooling with Tovah I decided to give her a “hooky pass” to use whenever she wanted to as long as there were no test she had to take or special deadlines we needed to meet. She would get her pass after the first report card period. I also gave her some type of reward at the end of the school year. It wasn’t because she had all A’s but it was for working hard and applying herself. She could have had all C’s and received the same reward. It was something small, thoughtful and inexpensive. I don’t believe in giving children money and big things for their grades or schoolwork. I’m old school and believe that you should strive to do your best no matter what. So she would get something like a set of chopsticks in a beautiful box. She learned how to eat with them at a young age and still does. Me, well all I have to say is, “Bring me a fork!” LOL!!!

Tovah wasn’t the only one who had a hooky pass, I gave myself a couple during the school year. On my good hooky days, sometimes I would surprise her with a movie in the middle of the week. We still talk about how we used to be the only ones in the entire theater sometimes. She loved it, as for me, I prayed a lot and we sat close to the exit…LOL!!! And then there were those days, I just didn’t feel like doing schoolwork and I knew we wouldn’t do well with my poor attitude, so Tovah got to sleep in, read books and pretty much do what she wanted to that day. On those days we most often didn’t put on any clothes, I mean what would be the point? We weren’t going anywhere. I still had to work, but at least I didn’t have to work and homeschool. I could usually call it quits early and we could crawl in the bed to watch movies or TV and just hangout. I loved playing hooky!

My granddaughter and I haven’t had the pleasure yet, but once we are a little more into the school year, she is going to a “hooky pass” and so am I!

The phrase “hooking school” has always had a bad connotation about it, because it means “Ditching school” but when you give permission it takes on a whole new meaning. So, I suggest you find out what it feels like to "hooky” school one of these days! Enjoy!!


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Next Thruday, is the American holiday "Thanksgiving!" Sorry, no blog will be posted.



Friday's Blog: An encouraging word for all!

Boy, Do I Need A Vacation!

Ponnie is standing in for Jennifer today.

“Boy, do I need a vacation!” Are the five most common words single moms often say to themselves, but many times it doesn’t happen for us. I’m talking a vacation without kids. LOL!! But I’ve found with the right planning and creativity there are ways for us to have mini vacations without needing a hotel room. ~Smile~

The key is planning and maybe even scrimping to make sure we have some extra money, but sisters, it can be done. All you need is a Friday evening, and all day Saturday. It’s a real bonus if you can get Saturday night too! You might be saying to yourself, “Where can I go for one or two nights?” Well, you don’t have to leave town at all, you just need to have a plan for some “Me time!” Most of the time what we really need is a break from the every day rituals of single motherhood when we feel like we could use a vacation. No cooking, cleaning, taxi service, homework, or any of the many other things we do on a daily bases. Yes, a trip out of the country would be nice, but sometimes we have to take what we can get, and if it means a break from ordinary life, we should grab it.

When was the last time you shipped your kids off to a relatives for the night or weekend? Well, there is much fun to be had if you can work that out. But you must have a plan!

If you can swing a night and full day by yourself have a "Plan A" and a "Plan B". Why? Because life is full of surprises and the best laid plans do fall apart. For one, don’t plan any household chores or errands during your time alone. In fact do your food shopping after work on Thursday and don’t leave your wash for the weekend. Cook Sunday’s dinner Thursday evening and anything else you might want to eat during the weekend. No chores! No guilt!!

Friday night after the kids are dropped off or picked up, jump into the first part of your plan. It could be getting ready to have a night out with the girls or a hot bubble bath with candle light and soft music. Treat yourself to a new pair of jammies or night gown for the occasion just as you would if you were going to a hotel. Maybe you’ll stop on your way home from work at your favorite seafood place to pick up dinner or maybe Chinese.

Sleep in a little on Saturday but not too late, you don’t want your free time to slip away. Eat breakfast out, even if it is just a cup of coffee and bagel at your favorite coffee house. And then have a plan to meet up with a friend to hangout or if you are one who loves being alone when you can, go to a movie, get a massage, a facial, a manicure or pedicure. There is so much you can do when you don’t have the kids, a plan and a few dollars in your pocket. When was the last time you went bowling with the girls or to a museum? You can make this time whatever you want. You can just hangout with you, hangout with your friends or a little bit of both. But no matter what you choose to do, make sure you don’t do one chore! Also have a plan for when the kids are back, pizza and a movie. Make it simple and not much work for you. Remember, you are on vacation from your everyday routines. Okay, so maybe by Sunday evening you will probably have to pack lunches and make sure you and the kids are ready for Monday, but like all vacations—they do come to an end! ~Smile~

Hope I have inspired you to plan a mini “Me” vacation that will at least give you a little peace and quiet and time for yourself.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Jennifer will see you in 2 weeks, December 1st!

Thursday's Blog: "It's Homeschool Thursday"

Excuse Me, “Got a Light?” Part II

See Part I Monday, November 15, 2010

There seems to be a great debate as to whether or not smoking is a sin, since the Bible doesn’t say, “Thou shall not smoke!” But God says, “Thou shall have no other gods (idols) before me!” And if you are a smoker, then you have an idol that you have put before God. Anything that controls us is an idol. Also it is very bad for your health, and Romans 12:1-2 says we are to offer up our bodies as living sacrifice holy and acceptable to God. And last but not least, smoking does affect your testimony to others. Why should they believe that your God can deliver them from drugs and alcohol when you’ve been a Christian for sometime and still smoke? How can you encourage others about the Power from the death of our Lord when you haven’t tapped into it yourself? Non-Believers most often do not read the Bible, but they read us. That is why, how we live is so important. Therefore how can we be a good example to those who are lost when we are standing out in the freezing cold to smoke a cigarette? How can we share the gospel effectively with our coworkers when they think we’re nuts for freezing our butts off and standing in the rain day in and day out to get a smoke?

If you are a smoker, it is time to let your cigarettes go! Not tomorrow, not next week, not waiting for the New Year, but right now! The first step is to make the decision in your heart that you want to let go. That they will no longer be something that you put before God. Next except that your addition to cigarettes was taken care of at the cross. You have to believe that you are delivered and then you must begin to walk that deliverance out. What do I mean? Now you have to start being a non-smoker. Say it, “I am no longer a smoker!” “I will no longer defile my body!” “I shall have no other gods before God, Creator of Heaven and Earth!”

Everyone is different and I have met many who just prayed and threw their cigarettes way and it was done. But I have also met those who have had to fight the temptation to smoke in order to be free. My mindset is get rid of your cigarettes and go “Cold Turkey!” Sometimes playing around with something that is not good for us, keeps us in bondage and we never totally get free. I know a woman who started weaning herself off of cigarettes. She cut herself down to ½ pack (10 cigarettes) a day and then it was two less each week until she only smoked after meals and then she cut it down to one cigarette after dinner. But she smoked that one cigarette for a couple of years. The bottom line was, she still held on. She may have cut her risk of lung caner down, but she still hadn’t moved into a place of complete trust in God with this issue as she held on to that one cigarette. Now it was my turn to say something, “Why do you still smoke at all,” I asked her one day? Her reaction was very similar to mine, in fact she was even more indignant because she had went from smoking a pack a day to 1 cigarette a day, how dare I question her!! But a couple of weeks after our conversation she called to tell me she was done. The seed had been planted and she realized that there was something amiss in her that she still felt she had to have that one cigarette a day. You would think it would be easy, to let go of one cigarette, but yet she found herself in a battle for a few weeks to not smoke it. So, my best advice to you is to give them up all at once and tough it out if you have to.

Getting a plan together is your next step. You might want to make sure you focus on how the emotional or psychological addiction might affect you. Here are a few suggestions to help start you on your way.

•Pray seeking help from the Holy Spirit.
•Tell someone who has your best interest at heart you’ve stopped smoking, to ensure accountability, and have someone praying with you.
•Prepare yourself emotionally for the times when you may be tempted to light up. As smokers we have triggers and habits that set us off to want to smoke. After eating a meal a cigarette really seems to help our food digest (not true but still that is how it feels). What are you going to do to replace this? Overeating is often a replacement in this area, but you want to make sure that doesn’t happen to you. What about getting up right after eating and doing a chore? Put a load of clothes in the washer, wash the dinner dishes even if someone else in the house is supposed to. Make your hands and mind busy.
•Learn some calming techniques to replace the coping skills that smoking filled for you. We often reach for a cigarette during stressful times, as overeaters reach for food. So, you are going to have to pray for guidance and wisdom during these times, and reach for your Bible.
•For the oral fixation you might experience. Eating carrots or celery sticks is a healthily substitution. Also sucking on sugar free lollypops or hard candy can help.

The side effects of quitting smoking are positive, such as a healthier outlook, increased lung function and better-smelling clothing, but sometimes it can also cause mild depression, anxiety and stress. This is where an exercise plan can really come in handy or spending time with others who are not smokers.

Prayer is going to be your greatest weapon of all. There might be a time when no matter what you try, the cigarette demon just won’t get off your back, but I can assure you that as 1 Corinthians 10:13 states, there is no temptation we encounter that God has not already made a way of escape for us. So some days, prayer alone is going to get you through.

When I stopped smoking I was smoking almost 2 packs of cigarettes a day. I would hate to think about what condition my lungs would be in from almost 40 years of smoking. Also, the expense! I don’t see how I could truly say that I was being a good steward over my money. Not if I were literally setting fire to it. Smoking isn't just bad for your health; but bad for everyone around you. It also adds to overall bad health in general and leads to many different illnesses other than lung cancer. Below is the link for the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, and the page for information on the ill effects of smoking. The facts are devastating to say the least.

http://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/data_statistics/fact_sheets/health_effects/effects_cig_smoking/

My prayer is that you become the person who says, “No” when asked, “Do you have a light?” And not the one who is asking.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie


Wednesday's Blog: Jennifer "Working Single Moms"

Excuse Me, “Got a Light?”

Good morning Sisters, Ponnie is standing in for Sasha today. She will be back in 2 weeks.

Whenever I’m asked, if I have a light, I love to say, “No,” or “I don’t smoke.” But that wasn’t always the case. I smoked cigarettes for over 19 years.

I was blessed to have found the power of the Cross before everyone started banning smoking in public places. I never had to stand outside of my work in order to grab a smoke. Also what I paid for a carton with 10 packs of cigarettes, would only buy you 2 packs today. But I must admit I loved my cigarettes. They were the last thing I touched at night and the first thing in the morning after brushing my teeth. Oh, how good that first cigarette tasted in the morning. How wonderful the second with my coffee and that is how my day started—puff, puff away!!

I started smoking in 1970, because I wanted to be cool and sophisticated. Too bad January 1, 1971 was when the cigarette industry was no longer allowed to advertise on radio and television. But by then it was too late for me, you see, I had already grown up watching the rough and rugged Marlboro man, riding his horse, making smoking one of the most desirable things to do. The constant TV commercials had already drilled in my head, “That’s the kind of guy I want to hangout with!” And if you didn’t ride horses but were still the rugged type then you smoked filterless Camels. Tareyton smokers would rather fight (have a black eye) then switch, and only the most sophisticated and sexiest of ladies, smoked Virginia Slims or Benson & Hedges Gold. And if you were really cool and hip, you smoked Kool menthols!!

Such a dumb reason to start smoking, but at the time smoking in the USA was as common place as apple pie, and no one told you that you would become addicted to nicotine, and the longer you smoked the better your chances of dying from lung cancer. It wasn’t until January 1, 1996, did the Federal Cigarette Labeling and Advertising Act take effect, and cigarette companies started labeling cigarette packages that smoking was hazardous to your health.

On Sunday, December 10, 1989 when I moved into agreement with God that I needed to be saved and decided I wanted my name in the “Book of Life” I was a heavy smoker and drinker. But on that day, immediately, I was no longer a drinker, but I still loved my cigarettes. One Sunday before the New Year, I went in my purse to get an ink pen and one of the church members saw my cigarettes and said, “You need to stop smoking and get rid of those cigarettes!” At first, I was enraged! “Who in the #!$?!!@!! does she think she is to be telling me I need to get rid of my cigarettes?!” (Remember, I was a babe, so my thoughts and words had not changed too much in that short time.) She saw the look in my eyes, yet proceeded to tell me that smoking makes me a poor witness to others. At the time I really didn’t understand what she was talking about, nor did I care. But the seed at been planted and every cigarette I smoked after that, just wasn’t as enjoyable as they had been before.

My pastor at the time was a mighty teacher of the Word of God, (and still is to this day), had been teaching on the power of the Cross. Did I understand a whole lot at the time” No, but I took to heart what I did and on December 31, 1989 I found myself on my knees praying in the New Year and telling God I didn’t want to smoke anymore and asking the Holy Spirit to help me. I got up off my knees, crumpled and tore up every cigarette I had and threw them in the kitchen trash can. And that was it for me. I didn’t go through a lot of changes or struggles, I believed with all my heart it was a done deal at the Cross. Now I wish I could tell you that was it for me, but then again, if it had remained so easy, I wouldn’t be able to encourage those of you who will have a struggle.

Three years after being cigarette free I ran into a huge obstacle in my life and I started smoking again. It lasted all of 6 weeks, but to my surprise, when I came to myself and crumbled up my last few cigarettes, there was a battle to be had. You see, it wasn’t as easy as the first time. Why? Because I chose to undo that which had already been done. This is when Matthew 12:43-45, opened up and had a very practical meaning to me. I had to pray constantly to not smoke. I gained about 12 lbs in the course of that battle, and there were days that I was down right miserable, because I wanted a smoke so bad. All the old triggers were back with a vengeance. After I ate a meal, the desire to smoke almost overwhelmed me. And to top it all off I was still dealing with the stressful situation that started it all! And the urge to smoke most days hounded me like a bill collector. It was ugly. But nonetheless, I still had the victory and did not go back to smoking again. It is now almost 2011 and I am still smoke free! Praise God!!

Also picking up smoking again, opened my eyes to the fact that if others knew I was smoking, it would tarnish my reputation as a Believer. For one, we are not as compassionate a people as we should be and instead of being concerned that something must really be wrong, we judge. I had an Aunt (who professed to be a Christian) who found out and she couldn’t wait to talk about it and try to rub my face in it. Of course she was after the fact and I had stopped, but I knew when I started again not to smoke before going to church and not in my car. (I didn’t want people to smell the cigarette smoke on me.) I knew that others were watching me and it wouldn’t look good, because they had seen a great change in me over the years and I had been talking to people about the great power of God. So not only was I smoking again, I was being a sneak about it. Well, so I thought anyway.....

Stay tuned tomorrow for Part II tomorrow.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Sasha will be back in 2 weeks, on November 29th


Tuesday's Blog: Part II "Excuse me, "You Got A Light?"

Why Are You Waiting?

We have 49 days until New Years, and many of us by then will have our New Years resolution list in hand. But I want to know, why are you waiting until the New Year to make change? If you see a need for change in your life, why not start now?

Out of curiosity I googled to see what are some of the top 5 New Years resolutions people make. After looking at 4 different lists I took the best of the best and most common and came up with my own.

First List:
1. Lose Weight
2. Travel
3. Buy house or new car
4. Find Love
5. More money

Second List:
1. Spend more time w/family and friends
2. Get fit
3. Lose weight
4. Stop smoking
5. Enjoy life more

Third List:
1. Eat more veggies
2. Try something new for exercise
3. Drop a bad habit
4. Cook more meals at home
5. New Years Solution “Pick it & Stick to it”

Fourth List:
1. Lose Weight and Get in Better Physical Shape
2. Stick to a budget
3. Reduce debt
4. Spend more time with family and friends
5. Find my soul mate

Ponnie’s List:
1.Lose Weight and Get in Better Physical Shape
2. Stick to a budget
3. Reduce debt
4. Stop Smoking
5. Enjoy life more

I think my list sort of covers it all, except the “Find my soul mate” rubbish. So, let’s take a quick look at my top 5 resolutions and think about why not starting now.

If losing weight and getting into better shape is going to be a top priority for you when the New Year rolls in, why not start making changes now. I’m trying not to eat sweets at night after dinner, and stop eating all together by 7:30pm. I chose that time because you really shouldn’t eat 2 hours before you go to bed, and it’s hard for me to stay awake to 10pm most nights. I’ve also noticed that since the weather is colder I haven’t been drinking much water and so I’m making an effort to change that. These are small changes, but they are still somewhat difficult to make and I’ve found that I must push myself. Once these changes become an everyday part of me, I can add something else to the mix that will help me reach my full potential.

Sticking to a budget is something we all should be doing, and if you’re waiting for the New Year to start, I say “Don’t! Start now!” Why wait? Are you putting it off so that you can spend, spend, spend for the holidays? If you start now you will more than likely not over spend during the holidays and that will set you up to start your New Year off on better financial footing.

Focus on reducing your debt now and you will not make mistakes in the next few weeks that may cause you grief. Often our New Years resolve to pay down debt has a lot to do with some of the debt we ran up during the holidays. But if you put a plan in place now—more than likely you won’t feel so blue when the January bills start coming in the mail.

I know a little bit about the bad habit of smoking and the addiction and pull it has on you. Monday’s blog will be about the ill effects that smoking has on our testimony, our health and our emotional well being. If you are a smoker, it is time to start doing something about that now—Today! See Monday’s “Healthy Lifestyles” blog for encouragement and tips on how to be free.

Enjoying life covers a broad spectrum so individually we have to figure out what that looks like for us. It could include travel, spending more time with friends and family, trying something new in life, walking away from those things we know are not good for us. Some of us would enjoy life much more if we were better organized or our homes were neater and clutter free. Maybe advancing our education or changing careers and earning more money will help us enjoy life more. But whatever it is that you feel you want to do, why not start working on it now? Why wait 49 more days? For what?

I have a question, knowing that there are things in your life that you would like to change and waiting 49 days to begin; does that fall under the heading of “procrastination”? Or are we just so caught up in the world’s way of doing things that we don’t really think about it?

So, I’m going to ask you one last time, “Why Are You Waiting? Why Not Start Now?”



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Monday's Blog: "Healthy Lifestyles"

Is It Time To Mix Things Up A Bit?

Over the years, I’ve found that like life, our homeschooling routines need to be mixed up or changed. I don’t know about anyone else, but I always had such high expectations in the beginning of the school year. Yet, as time would pass, I found I needed to come down to earth and look at what we could do in a more realistic manner. I’m a dreamer and though it has served me well, it can also be my downfall. But as a homeschooling grandmother, I’ve mellowed out and we started off the school year with our focus just on getting the work done and finding a good rhythm to achieve that.

After three months of intense work, it is time for a mix up of sorts. Being ahead in schoolwork affords us the freedom to get out once or twice a week without fear of falling behind. Two days out of the week we start school at 9am, versus 8am, which allows my granddaughter to sleep in a bit. I often take one of the mornings to sleep in myself, but I still get up before her, which gives me a little “me time”, before our day starts.

I’m really overjoyed that we have found a good rhythm for us, but I noticed a couple of weeks ago, that I was sort of bored. At first I couldn’t put my finger on what the problem was, but one of the things that occurred to me, is that the house was too quiet. I’m used to music, and I was missing my music. Headphones don’t work for me, I like the music floating from room-to-room, and “NO” I’m not the neighbor from hell with the loud music. LOL!! But it just wasn’t the silence; our routine was boring to me. I found I was sort of stuck in a rut with what I was doing. Time for a mix up!!!

Like decorating, you don’t have to do something grand to make changes that achieve great impact! So, using that mindset, I knew I didn’t have to redo or revamp our routine, just mix things up a bit for me. This week I started walking a couple of mornings, before school starts to shake the cobwebs out and get the creative juices flowing. That has really been good for me. The morning air was crisp and sunny, and felt so invigorating to say the least. Starting next week we are going to test having my granddaughter do a good portion of her schoolwork in her bedroom two days out of the week. Her room is bright and sunny and this will give me the opportunity to play music, or bang around the house. I can’t say whether this will work or not, because I don’t know if she will be in her room daydreaming or doing schoolwork, but time will tell. ~Smile~

If there is something about your school day that could use a little mixing up, then go for it! As I stated, it doesn’t have to be a huge change that will take a month to implement, just something that makes life a little easier or fun. It might be that you as the administrator/teacher could use a morning or afternoon to yourself. The kids could sleep in later or they could have a movie afternoon where they can’t bother you for 2 hours. Remember, just as hanging new drapes and adding a few throw pillows can greatly change the appearance of a room, so can doing something different just one day a week. A couple of little changes can make life better for everyone.


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Next Thruday: Another great homeschooling story, but you will have to tune in to see who writes it! ~Smile~

Friday's Blog: An encouraging word for all women!

I’m In a Relationship

Don’t you just love how on Facebook they have a “relationship status”? Yes, I’m sure it is on the top of your list of great things this world has to offer. LOL!! But, no seriously, it is very important to a lot of women, especially when they get to change it from “single” to “in a relationship”! Whoo Hoo!! All of a sudden life is grand and they have moved into the élite status of “not alone”!

Single sisters you know that God has given me the task of encouraging you to embrace and enjoy your singlehood, so you have to know, I’m going somewhere with this and it’s probably not where you think. ~Smile~

As daughters of the King, we are all in a “relationship”! The problem is many of us don’t acknowledge this fact or we don’t want to accept it. We are not so much focused on our relationship with God as much as wanting to have a relationship with a man.

Let’s take a look at Hannah — Samuel’s mother. She was his father’s first and number one wife, and he adored her even though her womb was barren; and she had given him any heirs. He was a man of great means and he lavished her with his love, attention and wealth. Even though his second wife kept popping out the babies!! Hannah’s husband did everything he could to make her happy, but even he could see that her desire to have a child was something he would not be able to compensate for. Yes, eventually the Lord did bless her with a son (Samuel) but God had a His timing and special plan all along. (Read I Samuel chapter 1)

I used Hannah’s story because she is a great example of how our human nature works. We are always looking at what we don’t have; convincing ourselves “I’ll be happy when….” She had so much to enjoy and be grateful for, but as you see she was still very unhappy. And like Hannah, we are still the same today. Just as she lived life not really enjoying her relationship with her husband to the fullest for many years, we too don’t often enjoy our relationship with the Lord to the fullest.

Sisters, we are in "Relationship" with the God Head, now how great is that?!! There will be none who can love us better. This truth is something we should spend time meditating on, so that it is deep in our hearts.

Marriage is not two half people coming together to make one whole. No, it is two whole people in the Lord who come together in Him to become one (a triple cord). And if you know anything about rope or cords, a triple cord is very strong and can withstand a lot and is hard to snap. Broken and unhappy people who come together are just two, broken and unhappy people, there’s no strength. So, if you are one of the many hundreds who are under the misconception that “marriage” will make you happy, then you will be very disappointed to find out that is not true. If you are unable to find joy, peace and purpose in your relationship with the Lord now, you are always going to be chasing that “something” that will make you happy. For instance, now you’re married—not quite as happy as you thought you would be but things will be better once you get that house. Hum, now you have the house—something’s still missing. Yes, you want to have a baby. Okay, so now you have the husband, house and baby, but you will be happier when there is more money coming in. See when we depend on people or things to bring us joy and make life complete—we are never satisfied.

Just as Samuel’s father could not fill the void that Hannah felt from not being able to have children, there is no man who can fill the void that is the special place for fellowship with God.

I challenge you to change your Facebook “single” status to “in a relationship” for 24 hours. And when your friends start to write you and want the 411 on who it is or start congratulating you, tell them some of the great attributes of God. Don’t say it’s him, but write something like, “I am so happy because He really loves me!” And then at the end of the 24 hours change it back. And when they want to know what happened???? Let them know who you really belong to! I know, I know…you have to be bold or playful for this one…LOL!!

By the way, how are you doing on the TV challenge from October 27th, What Do You Embrace? Are you seeing anything new in your life since you dropped a TV show and replaced that hour with spending time with the Lord? I sure hope that some of you took the challenge and have hung in there. We must work to make change in our lives. It doesn’t come by Osmosis. ~Smile~


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Hope to sit with you again on Wednesday, November 24th.


Thursday's Blog: Ponnie, "Homeschooling Granny"

What It Takes To Refine a Precious Metal

Over the years as a Believer, I’ve heard our learning process referred to as, “God is turning us into a vessel of honor, taking away all the dross.” Dross: the waste that comes to the surface of melting metal. Gold bullion usually has base metals such as lead, copper, iron, often bismuth, and traces of other stuff as well. Since I really don’t know that much about refining gold I decided to google the subject just to see what I could come up with. Well, it is way too much to explain in a blog…more like a 4 page term paper...LOL!!! But it did give me insight as to how precise and time consuming it can be.

Gold boullion melts at 1,102 degrees C or 2 015.6 degrees F. So just imagine the furnaces needed to melt down the bullion in order to become gold bars or prepare it for coining. And then there is the process of stirring the melted mixture with a lead spatula that has to be heated until it glows bright red. All the dross (waste) must be dredged off the top and — it requires practice and dexterity to take the melting-pot from the furnace (using a pair of long tongs) to cast the bars, so there is no spilling or chilling (cooling before it is poured) of the mass. Wow!! So when you think of this process in terms of God working to refine us and bring all the dross (waste) to the surface and then mold and perfect us, no wonder the learning process can seem so hard at times.

The reason gold has different Karats is due to the purity of the gold and how many times it’s been refined. So, 24 karat gold goes through much more than 14 karat or 10 karat. That is why you pay more for it. And just as it didn’t become 24 k with the first melting and firing up, neither do we. Sometimes the melting of gold is a long and slow process. Sound familiar? Sometimes life’s trials and tribulations are long and seem to take their sweet old time coming to an end. And when we are in the midst of it, we most often do not see the benefit. It is not until after things have calmed down, (begin to fall into place or our mindset and attitudes begin to change) do we see the benefit of what we have been going through.

I would have to say that the year 2010 has been a year where God has had me in the melting pot and has been slowly skimming off what He considers to be dross — my imperfections that are hindering my relationship with Him. We have a tendency to look for the beautiful finished object of great value when precious metals are refined and made into something. But I am beginning to think that our thinking might be off a bit when it comes to that analogy with God, because we rarely see what He sees in us. So for me, it seems that my refining is helping me to see the great beauty in God. After the hardships of the past 10 months, I am beginning to see God in a different light. He has brought to the surface my unbelief and how much I compartmentalized Him. He’s inspired me to see who He is in totality and not in the way I have been churched to do so over the years. I’m just beginning to get a glimpse of something new with Him, but I do know for sure it was the hardships of this past year that has brought me to this new place. That hot consistent slow fire needed to bring all the guck to the top. Those hidden issues of my heart.

As I’m writing this blog I have a chicken carcass simmering on the stove to make chicken stock. Once the water comes to a boil you must immediately turn it down to a low simmer. Why? Because a boil will make the fat and other guck keep moving around, but you want it to float to the surface so that you can keep skimming if off. And this process takes at least 2 to 3 hours, maybe longer because the simmer is slow and you want a good flavored stock.

Contrary to popular belief there are some things in this world that cannot be rushed. Life with God is one of them. There is no formula (as much as we try to have them) to manipulate God to move on our behalf. Rereading the Old Testament is showing me things I had not see or understood before. I think because I am seeking to know God for Himself and not in the way that I have been taught by others. I am beginning to see how much the organized church is so busy with church that we are missing God in many ways. I’m not judging or criticizing, I’m just stating a fact and if you disagree, I suggest you begin to read your Bible with new eyes. Read it like it is your first time (and for some of you it will be), forgetting how people have pulled scriptures out of context and built ministries on it. Read your Bible and begin to question why we do some of the things we do in church? And where did it come from?

Example, many churches (even large churches on the internet) have a practice of after the collection of tithes and offerings the congregation is asked to stand and declare a declaration of what they are looking for from God for bringing their tithes to Him. (Usually read off a screen) And at the end we finally get around to saying we look to have money to spread the gospel. Mind you, at the end, not the beginning. And so you have new converts (Christians) who come to the Lord and start doing this every Sunday without knowing why? So immediately we are teaching the saints to think that God owes them something or is obligated to do something because they are bringing money He has made a way for them to have. This is wrong. Who came up with this and why do so many churches have this practice is the question we should be asking? Read your Bible in totality, not picking out scriptures for this or that. I hadn’t planned to go here, but I write according to the prompting of the Holy Spirit, so please don’t be upset with what I wrote, just take a good look at why you do what you do and where it is coming from.

It takes God’s timing to create in us that which we were born for and though we have the ability to prolong things, we don’t have the ability to rush things before its time. So if you have been in the valley or wilderness for what seems like a long time, and you are striving to live a life of obedience, don’t be disheartened because it seems that God doesn’t hear you or care. It is not that at all. In fact His love for us is so deep He will allow the hard times if at the end it serves His purpose. The refining process can be lengthy at times and if that is what is needed for us to get to where God wants us to be—then so be it!



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Wednesday's Blog: Ponnie "Single and Loving

Swipe, Swipe! Where Did It Go?

Hi ladies, I’m standing in for Sharon today. But I’m just giving a different point of view on her blog “Teach the Children” posted Monday, September 21, 2010. Sharon’s blog talked about teaching our children about money and managing their finances using envelopes. It is a great system because I used it more than 10 years ago with Tovah and I’m using it now with my granddaughter. But when I thought about it, I used it many years ago for myself (before ATMs and debit cards) to budget and keep track of my cash. And lately I’ve been doing it again. Why? With using a visa check/debit card all the time — my money has a tendency to get away from me. Swipe, swipe! It’s gone!

In so many ways, “Direct Deposit” is great!! But depending on who you are and how good you are at managing money, it sometimes backfires on us. You wake up in the morning and your money is there…off you go. “I think I’ll treat myself to breakfast this morning.” “I’ve been brown bagging it all week, so today I’m going to buy lunch.” “Let’s see I can’t get to the market until tomorrow or the next day, and I really don’t feel like cooking—hum, pizza or Chinese?” So, we’ve already spent $30.00 without blinking an eye. Swipe, swipe — it’s gone!

Paydays are all over the map for people. It is common place for nurses to get paid on Wednesdays, city and government workers on Thursdays, and Friday is a big pay day for many. How often we get paid also varies, some of us get paid every week, some biweekly, others on the 1st and 15th of the month and a huge group in academia gets paid once a month. This translates into, the further apart your payday, the better steward of your money you must strive to be. That’s if you don’t want to be broke before your next pay. ~Smile~

Cash in hand helps us to better see where our money is going. How many of you have overspent using your check/debit card? I’m laughing to myself, because probably a lot of you have raised your hands, or cried out, “I have!” I’m not suggesting you hoard cash in the house and carry a lot on you, but I am suggesting that maybe before you go to the market have a budget and pull the cash out at the ATM first. If you have a day of running errands, calculate how much you will need, and use cash that day. Hanging out with the family or friends, decide what your budget is and take cash only, and when it’s gone it’s gone. Don’t run to the machine for more, or give into the temptation to swipe your card. Stick to your cash budget.

I know that in the mornings our favorite coffee and breakfast haunts have that little machine where you swipe your card and the line moves so much faster. The check card folks (visa) had a commercial on how the lines run so smoothly when you swipe your card and then some dummy comes along and pays cash and messes up the works. The big financial institutes know that by convincing people to swipe, swipe, SWIPE! We spend more, more, MORE! And before the government came down on the banks about how they were giving us money that we didn’t have and charging us astronomical fees to boot, they were racking millions each year on those overdraft fees. How many of you have swiped your card, went over as little as $2.00 and had to pay a $30.00 fee? I’m pretty sure most of you have had that experience at least once. Truth is, we may not have thought about what we were doing every time we swiped, but the financial institutes sure knew what they were doing in encouraging us to swipe.

Paying cash can be twofold. One, it will help us not to overspend and two; we are helping the world still remember how to count money. LOL!! I mean, it is getting pretty bad with some of the cashiers I have run into lately. They can only count what the register tells them, so don’t you dare give them change after they have put in the bills….they just can’t figure it out. ~Smile~

Some of us are begging God right now for an increase in our finances, but the truth be told; we aren’t handling what we have. Learn to be faithful and a good steward over what you have, then expect more.

I know we are living in a world that is trying to go paperless, but I think we still need to see what paper our money is printed on. Capiche!


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Sharon will be back in 2 weeks with more great "Financial Wisdom" for us"

Tuesday's Blog: Ponnie will be writing all blogs this week and I hope to inspire you as much as the other sisters do. ~Smile~