The Lines Are Getting Blurred

For many Christians the lines between what is Sin and what is not are becoming blurred. And this is a big problem for the Church and us as individuals. For one, we watch way too much TV and it is a vehicle of getting the world’s point of view across in every single media that it can. And since most of us spend more time watching TV or being on the internet than we do reading our Bibles, we process more of what the world has to say then what God has to say. That really is the basis or root of the problem.

A few weeks ago a young man attending university in my area committed suicide because his roommate and another person fed a live broadcast on the internet (through a computer webcam) of his sexual activity with another man. What was done to him was unconscionable to say the least and my heart aches for his family because as with all life he had such great potential. But instead of focusing on the invasion of privacy and lack of respect for human rights there was a chain reaction and outcry from all over the United States, about the bulling of homosexuals.

Personally I don’t think bulling should be tolerated on any level to anyone. And since we are instructed as Christians to treat others the way we want to be treated, and love our neighbors as we love ourselves, then it is safe to say that God is not pleased with that type of treatment of another human being either. In the past few years there have been several incidents where both boys and girls have committed suicide because they were bullied at school and cyber bullied. But this recent incident seemed to spearhead an agenda for the homosexual lifestyle. Not just for consenting adults but for teens. Now am I the only one that has a problem with kids having a sexual orientation whether it is heterosexual or homosexual? They should have a sexual gender, but that should be about it. This new tolerance that is being taught goes against all that God says, “Sex outside of marriage (a man and a woman) is sin.” It is that simple.

I’m not sure that this same type of incident would not have provoked the same response of a married woman having heterosexual relations with a man who was not her husband if it were broadcast live on the internet. Even a pastor of a church having sex with a woman who was not his wife might fall into the temptation of suicide because he could not bear the shame of it all. What about a married couple into role playing or bondage and slavery. How would one of them react to their children, family and friends seeing this on the internet, when they thought it was in the privacy of their own home? It was curl what this young man’s roommate did to him, but I don’t see where it was bullying and how it opened up such a forum for gay sexuality?

As Christians are we to bash and condemn people because they live a life of sin? NO!! Because before I was saved, I was hanging out and sinning with the best of them. And the Messiah died on the cross for all even while we were in our sin, and it is God’s desire that all men be saved. But we are given choices. No matter how deep the scars of life are, the Blood of Jesus can heal them. No matter what the generational curse is that has plagued your family over the years; the Blood of the Lamb can break that bondage. Many of us before coming into the Kingdom of God, shacked up and played house, (like the woman at the well) had children out of wedlock, (like Tamar the daughter-in-law of Judah) used drugs, tried bi-sexual relationships, watched porn, prostituted ourselves, had abortions, were thieves, drinkers, and so on. But just as we have been delivered, forgiven and set free, we must not forget the Blood of Jesus still holds that same power for — ALL!

It is not okay to let the world teach our children that having two mommies or two daddies is okay, unless their parents are divorced and we are talking about step parents. It is not okay to accept the world’s philosophy and point of view on same sex marriages. We are not to buy into they were born that way and therefore God is okay with this. That’s a lie! God is not okay with Sin. We seem to be partnering up with the world more and more. Yet, our Bible assures us that “Christ is coming back for a church without spot or wrinkle.” So, are we delaying His coming to get us by our watered down stance of the Bible or are we putting ourselves in a position of judgment from God? That’s something to really think about.

It seems more-and-more; that we are standing side-by-side with the world and trying to convince others that God’s love covers the homosexual lifestyle. God’s love covers the sin of man…Period! But we need to read our Bibles and see that it tells us that there is sin unto death. So, He has not turned a blind eye to the sin of this world and though He is a God of love, He is also a God of judgment. That’s the part we don’t really want to look at, but it is true. Sin, is judged by God. We as Believers are to convey what God has said, it does not mean we are making judgment on people, because God is the one who has already judged it as sin and wrong. The judgment is not passed on the person but the behavior. God judged the act of homosexuality as sin way before any of us who are living now were ever born. Read the book of Genesis if you think I am incorrect.

Now you might be the parent, relative or friend of someone who is living a homosexual lifestyle, and I want you to be encouraged that God is able to deal with it. But they have to come to realization that they are a sinner just like everyone else who has come into the Kingdom of God. There are no free passes on acknowledging that you are a sinner and need Christ. I read a book almost 20 years ago by Barbara Johnson. She went home to be with the Lord 2007, and some of you may be familiar with her from the Women of Faith Conferences. The book is Stick a Geranium in Your Hat and Be Happy (John, Sally) by Barbara Johnson. She talks openly about the emotional roller coaster she experienced when she found out one of her sons was living a secret homosexual lifestyle. It wasn’t pretty, but it was real. You will cry and also find laughter and hope in this book. And especially if you are a mother who has a child living this lifestyle and feel hopeless or don’t know what to do; I think you will be encouraged in a big way.

In the Body we have Christians that are all the way to the right, and think showing love means to be tolerant of all kinds of sin. But we also have Christians who are all the way to the left and are anti-gay, and have no mercy or love for the person. As with all things we need balance and the balance for us is what the Word of God says. But the truth is so many of us don’t really know what it says. Why? Because in America, we are just too lazy to read what it says for ourselves. We want to let our pastors spoon feed us, (and some of them need to know more about what it says themselves) or read books about the Bible, but not the Bible itself. God has judged the act of sin, whether it is rape, incest, adultery, fornication, homosexuality, pedophilia, stealing, lying, murder, gossip, envy, lust, jealousy, unforgiveness, anger, rage, back biting, persecution of the brethren, assault, pride, haughtiness, laziness, rudeness, cheating, I mean, the list just goes on, but the bottom line is….SIN is SIN and God has spelled it out for us exactly what that entails.

We are to be a light unto the world which is dark. But because we are all over the place and have so many blurred lines we are not the light that we should be. Picture it...Judgment Day! You are standing before the Messiah giving account for your life, and He informs you that because you turned a blind eye to the sin of someone close to you and did not tell them the truth they are now going to spend eternity in hell and it was going to be held against you? Take a moment and think about that….

The Priest Eli (the one who raised Samuel) had wicked sons (who were priest) and they were doing some really nasty things to the people (in the name of God), and as their father and head priest he did not call them on it and God, ended Eli’s life for that, and killed his sons. In fact He cut off the bloodline. When we read the Word of God in its totality we begin to see how God works and know exactly what the Bible says, and not what someone else has told us it says.

We are to be gentle and kind to others. We should season our words with love, and live a life that reflects Christ, but we are not to accept sin and try to convince others that they should too!

What are your blurring lines? How much do you really know about what God has to say about things? If you are not sure — Read your Bible.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Monday's Blog: Sasha, "Healthy Lifestyles"

Thing Are Starting to Come Together

My 11 year old granddaughter and I started homeschooling Monday, August 30th of this year. She really didn’t have a say in the matter because it was the best decision for her 6th grade education at this time. Now, like most of us she was not happy about being told she didn’t have a choice and this is the way it was going to be. But that is the reality of life. So, we started our school year off with a girl who didn’t want to be homeschooled, live with her grandmother, and not that enthused about school in general. Need I say this all translated into a very bumpy start!

I was not new to using cyber school to homeschool. My youngest daughter and I used it for 2 of the 6 years we homeschooled and it was pretty good. The reason I chose cyber school back then was because I wanted to use the “Calvert Curriculum” and it was available through the PA Cyber Charter School, which saved me money I really didn’t have. So I felt confident in doing cyber school with my granddaughter. Well, things do not always turnout the way we think they are going to. We are in a different cyber school, and personally I think their system is very overwhelming. I would hate to think how it is for someone who has never homeschooled before and coming in at grade 6. So, not only did I have a child on my hands that I had to pull along, I was also hating this particular cyber school and the way they did things. That bumpy beginning took a huge turn for the worse.

If I hadn’t known for sure that this was something the Lord had asked of me, I really don’t know what I would have done??? But even with the security of “This is what I am supposed to be doing” I still had great days of frustration. But I wasn’t alone, my granddaughter was also very frustrated and this combination made for long hard school days. And to top it all off, she had gaps in math and grammar…errrrrr!!! There were many tears for her and some for me too those first few weeks. It seemed as if we were doing schoolwork 7 days a week, just for her to keep up. Wait! We were doing schoolwork 7 days a week! And to top this off, the cyber school added even more on my plate with attending so many different sessions that I had to keep rearranging my life. Another pet peeve of mine about this school was they were very last minute with a lot of stuff, too much overlapping of things and just a royal pain in the butt! If I could have gotten out of this someway, I would have bailed. But I couldn’t and I didn’t!

But about 2 ½ weeks ago, things really started coming together for us. We made it through the first round of her turning in certain work for a portfolio to her teacher, and we were no longer carrying leftover work from one week to the next and for the past 2 weekends, we did not have to do schoolwork to keep up. In fact we are ahead in some subjects! Yes, praise the Lord!!!

I focused on how hard and frustrating things were in the beginning to encourage anyone who reads this blog and is having a hard time at it, (especially if you are a first time homeschooler) to not give up and hang in there. Things do get better. I think sometimes as human beings we get confused when we enter into a new season of life were God has ordered our steps that it is somehow supposed to be easier. But that is far from the truth. Life can be very challenging with God’s blessings. Jesus warns us, “Their will be trails and tribulations!” Most Believers #1 reason for homeschooling is to make sure that their children are raised with good Christian values and a focus on living for the Lord. So, we must remember we have an enemy who is not pleased with a choice such as that because it will bring harm to his kingdom. Therefore, as many obstacles as he can possibly lie before us he will. But in all of it we must remember that we can do all things through Christ according to God’s will for us.

Prayer is key in helping us not to become so overwhelmed we want to give up. If you don’t have a person in your life (homeschooler or not) who you can talk to and cry with and will encourage you, then my prayer for you is that you seek God for such a friend.

My advice to new homeschoolers is not to give up and keep seeking new ways to make things work for you. Sometimes you might need to change your curriculum or how you are using it. It could be the cyber school that you are using, because they are not all the same. Like anything in life, you have your good ones and you have your not so good ones. It is still very early in the school year, so don’t let the everyday struggles make you feel defeated or that you made the wrong decision. Remember why you decided to homeschool and keep that in the forefront to encourage you to forge on.

Please look for my upcoming eBook “Single Parents Can Homeschool Too!” Coming in the early part of 2011.


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Next Thruday: Another great homeschooling story, but you will have to tune in to see who writes it! ~Smile~

Friday's Blog: Tackles are hard subject, but sometimes we need to go there. Please stop by to check it out.

What Do You Embrace?

What is it about being single that you embrace? Embrace: figurative…to take up; take for oneself; accept. What is it about being a single woman do you accept? I ask this question because I’ve noticed that single women who are unhappy have a root issue of non-acceptance of being single. But once we can “embrace” our singlehood then life can be so much better.

We all embrace something in our lives, beyond our Christianity. Too often we find ourselves embracing things of the world versus things of God. Whether good or bad, as humans we embrace cultures, theories, religions, Sin, reality TV, ways of dressing, speaking, looking, I mean the list goes on forever. So, again, “What is it that you embrace about being single?” I know that’s a tough question for some, because you really don’t embrace singlehood. In fact there are those of you who loathe the fact that you don’t have a man. You beg and plead with God every chance you get for a husband, while your days just quietly slip away not being lived to their fullest. But then there are those of us who love being single and “embrace” it wholeheartedly. Yet why is it so hard for those who embrace the single life to convince their unhappy single sisters how great it is? The culprit seems to be a hardened heart. Just because you are a Believer, doesn’t mean we don’t have places in our hearts that are not still stony and hard.

Our human nature and flesh love to go against what God says. It is a battle that Jesus instructs us to pray about in Matthew 26:4. So when we set our minds (souls) to what we want it is rather hard to be persuaded to something else. It seems almost impossible at times to try to get unhappy single women to see the benefits of the single life in Christ. I fault both the Church and the world for that. But you ladies don’t get off totally free either. The Church really does not promote and uplift single women. And even the individual church congregations are not much better. You have so many married women in the Body worrying single women as to when are they are going to get married? Or what they need to do to try to hook a husband. The church congregations are so very concerned for married couples (like they are the, be-all to end-all) and have plenty to help them grow in their marriages. But that same church will not have Women’s Bible Study or anything of substance for single women to help them grown and flourish in who they are. And the sad thing is most are not really interested in making a place for single women. Churches basically have, married couples groups, youth groups, children’s church and seniors groups. But what about us single gals? And we cannot all be lumped together either. You have your young women, widows, middle aged women, and in this diversity there are different struggles. Jesus was very concerned about single women just read the gospels of Matthew, Mark, and Luke.

Now the world is crazy and is on its way to judgment and hell, but we still follow behind so much of what they do. We make a steady diet of feeding off their foolishness. The world says that everyone should have somebody. You can be an adulteress and share someone’s husband, and when you get caught, you are rewarded with a reality TV show, a book deal or magazine spread. You might even be able to sue your former lover and get rich off of him….or her! If you are tired of men, then you should try being loved by another woman, and if that doesn’t really float your boat then try a young boy. We love the soaps, reality shows of misbehaving fouled mouth women…and joke “Well, that is my one vice...LOL!!” But all of this craziness that we keep feeding on only adds to the fuel of our flesh warring against the Spirit of God.

Okay sisters, it’s your turn. You have to want to be more in tune with what God says about your life. You have to make choices that are better for you spiritually. If you are one who is always hanging around married couples and this causes you to covet their lives, then it is time to do something different. If you TiVo the soaps and watch them every day, it is time to give then up. They only confuse you and make you desire things that are make believe. So, again I ask, “What is it that you embrace about being single?” For all of you who are single and not experiencing joy in your singlehood; it is time to re-evaluate what it is that you are embracing in life. Are you embracing what the Word of God says about being single in His Kingdom, or are you embracing the foolishness of the world and others?

I have a 3 week challenge for you. Pick an hour TV show that you watch every evening or day, Monday through Friday and replace watching that show with reading your Bible, praying, listening to Word messages (via cds, mp3 or internet), or listening to Christian music that will minister to your soul. Pick your most favorite shows that are off the hook! Pick a show you know is so far from anything God says, or that show that makes you long for things you don’t have. Now your flesh is going to rebel, because we know how we act when the cable or satellite dish goes out for a day or two. But we also know that we didn’t die because we didn’t have TV for awhile, so one show each evening, 5 times a week is not going to kill you. In fact, I am prayerful it will help you to let go of things you have been embracing that are harmful and begin to embrace that which is good in your singlehood.

So please take the challenge!


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Hope to sit with you again on Wednesday, November 10th.


Thursday's Blog: Ponnie, "Homeschooling Granny"

Fessing UP!

Lately I’ve been feeling a little blue and disconnected in life and yesterday it tried to overtake me. I think it started with not having had a goodnight’s sleep for 3 nights in a row. I found myself waking up about every 2 hours and by 4:30am I was wide awake and not able to go back to sleep. It seems that I kept dreaming about things I’ve secretly been anxious about. It was one of those times I really needed to talk to someone, but—I couldn’t get in touch with the one person I knew would be a good listener and have great godly wisdom concerning my dilemma. After the 3rd try and no answer, I knew then that somehow God wanted me to talk to Him. BUT, I didn’t want to pray, I needed to talk so that I could hear myself think things through. You see, the Holy Spirit has been bringing things to the surface and I needed to face as much of it as I could handle in one setting. That is why I couldn’t pray about it, I really wasn’t sure what it was? It was all meshed up inside of me. What was I to do now? I needed some sort of immediate release or I thought I would just scream. Now that might have worked if I were somewhere that others wouldn’t have been frightened or concerned by my screaming, but I live in the city, and blood curdling screams often prompt my neighbors to call the police. So what did I do? I wrote to God.

I was sitting on the side of my bed when I grabbed a composition book and started writing. There was nothing elegant about my words; it all came straight from my heart, emotions and mind. It was open and honest. I wasn’t concerned with what God thought about my writing and I didn’t have to worry about my spelling, grammar or punctuation. None of that mattered one bit. My biggest concern was to keep writing as fast as I could through all the tears. I really don’t like writing longhand and write all my blogs by typing them out on the computer. I took shorthand back in high school (the late 60”s) but I only half remember it, so when I have to take notes, it is a combo of the real stuff and my stuff. ~Smile~ But I was moved to write everything out in longhand, no shortcuts, no abbreviations.

The exact details of what I wrote is between me and God, but I will share that writing down on paper what I felt helped to soothe the rage and sadness. I was able to tell God how bad I felt and in doing so, I could see in some respects, why? But then on the other hand, I asked God more than once, “Why?” I want to know, “Why me?” “How come and how long?” It felt good to talk about something that after 18 years seemed to be getting harder. It really helped me to say that “Today” I didn’t feel I wanted to go on anymore. I could feel the pressure ease as I questioned God as to why I had ever been born. I think that some of you understand that question especially if your childhood was one that scarred you for most of your life. I was able to write that I was tired of caring for and encouraging others but others not caring about me. I wasn’t ashamed to cry and say that as a mother I often felt like a failure as to the task that God has given me. And the letter went, on, and on, and on!! And at the end, I felt so much better!! God, the Messiah and Holy Spirit had all listened to me open my heart, display my fears and doubts and cry my eyes out all at the same time. They didn’t interrupt me, they didn’t give me Bible verses, they didn’t tell me clichés or give me a formula of how I can get God to move on my behalf. Nope, they just listened intently. And that was what I needed at that moment.

No, this is not the end, because God always responds to us, and I wrote for one half an hour to Him, and I know that He is going to address every single thing with me. How He will do that I’m not sure, but I know it will take time. Yet, I am happy about all of this, because now that I have admitted my true feelings and stirred up a hornets nest, so to speak, I can begin to get to the root of the problem. Most of the stuff I talked about are symptoms of something much greater.

I shared this today, because I know that on any given day, we as God’s daughters have feelings about life we might be ashamed to confess in a public forum or think we can hide from God. But the truth is we can’t hide anything from Him. The Lord was not upset with what I said, in anyway. Why? It was old news to Him. I was the one that had to come to grips with what was in my heart. Will He punish me for anything that I said or felt? Nope! Through His loving kindness He is going to help me through this season in my life. In fact, He knew that this was the time for Him to pull these things out, so that we could sit down together and begin to sort through all of it and put things in order.

Yes, my life is very hard right now and has been most of my life, but that is not unique to say the least. I don’t see anyone in the Bible whose life was all that easy. Even the greats of the Bible had hard times, trails and tribulations. I would have to say that Job caught it the most. He did absolutely nothing other than be a man that God knew could stand the test. Will things get better for me? I have hope that it will, but I am trying to learn that even if they don’t, to continue to live a life that trusts God. Meaning that even if He chooses not to change my circumstances, accept His way as best for me.

Sisters, I pray that I have encouraged you who are experiencing a heavy heart about life, to talk to God about what you are feeling in an open and honest way. If you are angry with Him, then say it, because if you are, you need to take a look at why? God is not going to be upset because you express that you are angry, hurt, tired and fed-up! Nope! He already knows. But He needs you to bring it to Him so that it can be worked out. In other words—we have to fess up to what’s on our minds and heart.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Wednesday's Blog: Ponnie "Single and Loving

Four Steps to Simple Record-Keeping

If any of you are like me, paper is a little hard to tame if you don’t have a good system. There is nothing new under the sun. As such, I found the below advice from Mary Hunt’s Debt-Proof Living website. I trust that it will help you stay organized as you wade through financial waters.

If the paper monster has buried you under an avalanche of receipts, bank statements, ATM slips, investment records, paycheck stubs and bills, the good news is you can probably throw most of it away without worry. But before you fire up the shredder, you need to know what to toss and what to keep.

Step 1: Toss all you can.

Monthly. Once you have reconciled your bank and credit card statements, you can shred ATM receipts, bank deposit slips, credit card receipts and sales receipts at the end of each month. Keep receipts for purchases that may be tax deductible, those that involve warranties and any item that has a replacement cost that exceeds the deductible on your homeowners' or renters' insurance.

Yearly. Once you reconcile your W-2 against your paycheck stubs, you can toss those stubs for the year along with monthly credit-card and mortgage statements, phone and utility bills and quarterly and monthly investment reports. The same goes for other statements that detail the entire year's activity on a final end-of-the year statement.

Step 2: Keep what you must.

Three to seven years. Hang on to year-end statements for credit card accounts, mortgage statements, investments, W-2s and 1099s that recap the year's activities. Keep these for at least three years, along with canceled checks and receipts for deductible expenses, retirement account contributions, charitable donations, child-care bills, mortgage interest and all other items that support your income tax filings. The IRS has three years to examine your tax return for errors and up to six years if there's reason to suspect that you underreported your gross income by 25 percent or more. Until all possible audit windows close, you should retain all supporting documents.

Indefinitely. Keep tax returns for the long haul and receipts for major purchases and home improvements as long as you own them. In the event of an insurance claim, you may need to prove these purchases or your heirs will need to know how much you paid for them for tax purposes.

Step 3: Pick a spot.

If you don't have a designated place for paperwork, it's going to end up in piles all over the house. The secret for taming the paper monster is to designate one room, corner, drawer, cabinet or closet where you store all of your bills, current records and paperwork. You'll need a trash can, file folders and a container to hold them. Keep all of your important papers in this one place. For paperwork that you will keep longer than one month, create a file folder. One folder might be labeled "Tax Deductible," another "Insurance," and so on.

Step 4: Stick to it.

Get into a routine of tossing what you can and filing the rest. Keep your system simple and you'll stick with it.

You'll be amazed at the difference a little organization will make in your life. You'll be less likely to misplace bills, miss payment deadlines or forget to take valuable tax-deductions. The biggest payoff will be peace of mind.


Peace & Blessings
Sharon

I will have more for you on Monday, November 8th! Until then keep working your plan for financial peace and freedom.


Tuesday's Blog: Ponnie has a special blog for us

What's on Your Christmas List?

I guess you might say this is a week of list for me. ~Smile~ Tuesday, I talked about our To-Do List, and today I want to talk about our Christmas List. Today’s blog has something for all women, but I am really speaking more so to single moms.

In about two weeks, we (in the USA) will be bombarded with advertisements for Christmas shopping and the countdown will begin. K-Mart already has commercials about laying away items over an 8 week period, which is not a bad idea if you are on a budget and not trying to have credit card debt. But very soon, we are going to have it coming at us from all ends.

The American economy is far from good, but that does not mean everyone in the States is broke or destitute? No, there are those who are getting richer each day just like so many are getting poorer each day. But it has been very hard for some of us to let go of the so called, “American Dream” and as long as we hold credit cards, we are still easily drawn into the spirit of “spending money we don’t have” during the holiday season. We can even get so caught up in things that we put off paying bills in order to have money for Christmas shopping. My goal today is to give you food for thought on being a good steward of the monies God has given you, and if you do not have money to spend to not be discouraged or depressed about it.

First I want to give you a little background concerning my personal views about Christmas, so that you can have a better understanding of where I am coming from.

At this point in my life, I really don’t celebrate Christmas. For the past several years, Tovah and I have gone to the movies on Christmas day. It’s hard to find a church that has services on Christmas morning anymore if it doesn’t fall on Sunday.

With my first daughter who is 35 years old, I was very foolish in running up debt and not paying all my bills the month of December. I did this in order to buy plenty of stuff for her, my friends and family. With Tovah, my 17 year old, I was a new Believer when she came along and I was beginning to see that not being a good steward of God’s money and not paying your bills on time was not how the Lord desired for me to live. Also, I read in my Bible that the Messiah is absolute in the fact that when we feed the hungry, visit the sick, visit those in prison, clothe the naked, we do that for Him. Well, people are hungry, sick, imprisoned and in need of shelter and clothing 365 days a year. And since we mostly buy gifts for our kids and other people, we are not really honoring the Messiah. And last but not least, December 25th is not when He was born, so how about that! Now I don’t tell people what they should or shouldn’t do concerning the Christmas holiday, but I do try to help those who are locked in the bondage of what the world is doing to be freed. There is such freedom in not being caught up in the so called “spirit of Christmas,” which really is a spirit of “the lust of the eye and give me”

One year we adopted a single mother and her 2 year old who were in a women’s shelter we used to support. Tovah (who was 9 at the time) took her own money to buy the baby outfits at K-mart. But we also did many different things for the shelter throughout the year. We’ve done the “Samaritan Purse” Christmas boxes. But our biggest gift to others was our “Christmas Eve Suppers for singles.” Each year we had a big bash for singles, (men & women), because there is a large group of single people who are very lonely on Christmas Eve. They don’t have children or their children are grown, some are living with their other parent, or their family is in another country and most of their invites are for Christmas day dinner.

We didn’t hold back one iota with the suppers. I pulled out my best china (still cheap stuff…LOL!!), shined the many pieces of silver I owned back then, set the most beautiful table, lit about 25 candles (yes, we ate by candle light) and fixed a lavished seafood dinner. I baked homemade cookies, cherry cheese cake and sweet potato pies. And I waited on everyone as if they were in a fine restaurant. Every seat at the table was filled and I ate when everyone had left for the evening. It was always so much fun and each year there were familiar faces, but always someone new. The table was comprised of people ranging in ages 19 to their 60’s. And everyone took home a special baked goodie just for them. But most of all, they were not lonely. That was the best feedback I received. By the time they left, they had laughed a lot, been fed well and didn’t mind going home to be alone on a night the world projects should be so magical.

After everyone left, Tovah would open up the few gifts she received. We had a deal, if we were going to celebrate the 25th as the Messiah’s birthday, then any gifts we wanted to give each other would have to be opened on the 24th. It’s really funny how just recently Tovah noticed she basically received the same thing every year. Books, music CD and a Nancy Drew logic game…LOL!!! She was a homeschooled kid; her gifts had to be about learning on some level…hee, hee! I really didn’t spend very much on her. But her birthday was like most kid’s Christmas. She was allowed to make requests for things she wanted, and I never had a problem finding any of it, because by April whatever had sold out at Christmas that had everyone in an uproar of how to get it, was back on the store shelves in abundance.

Last year I did something different and gave Tovah one logic game for her DS and a visa gift card, which she used after New Year’s (waiting for the good sales) and she cleaned up on clothing. A light bulb went on for her! Wow, this is the time to buy my winter clothing. The blessing is that since I did not raise Tovah to expect anything for herself for Christmas, it has never been a problem when my funds were low. She was always very grateful for whatever little thing she received, because she knew “it was not about her.”

Just for fun this year, we are going to celebrate “Hanukah!” A friend gave me a Menorah and a book on Hanukah. Since Tovah and I have been associated with Messianic Jews (Jews who believe that Yeshua the messiah was crucified on the cross for our sins) for the past 5 years, we thought it would be fun. At first Tovah was ecstatic because she thought she was going to get 7 gifts…LOL!! One for each night, but she did agree that 3 of the gifts would be handmade, 3 small gifts would be purchased and together we would do one big gift to spread the gospel. I guess the most exciting part of it is that we are going to try to have guest every night for supper and the lighting of the candle. No seafood, but latkes, homemade applesauce, roasted chicken and meat loaf. We purchased two Jewish holiday cookbooks (used) and since we both love to bake, our gift to our guest will be a homemade goodie. Fellowshipping and introducing people to something new seems like it is going to be a lot of fun.

A couple of years ago a friend was just too overwhelmed with trying to figure out things for Christmas, sat down and realistically looked at her finances (or lack of finances), she made the decision to buy things to redo her teen daughter’s bedroom. It was on her things she wanted to do in the house list, so instead of waiting for the spring that was going to be her gift. She really didn’t spend a lot because she purchased the paint on sale, found the loveliest bed in a bag set and matching drapes on clearance. She made throw pillows for her bed and bought a couple of inexpensive throw rugs from IKEA, a bed lamp and book case from Wal-Mart. All this for a little over $100. The day after Christmas the two of them prepped and painted her room and by day 2 it looked like a totally different room. Other family members gave her daughter gifts and some money. But what she loved the most was how great her roomed looked and that she and mother had done it together.

Single moms, I admonish you to think about Christmas in a way that can bring peace and joy to you and your family. If you have young children, don’t raise them to expect a bunch of stuff under a tree each year, it will save you a lot of heartache and disappointment through the years. And if you have older children who were raised to expect a lot but you just can’t do that this year, then it is time for them to grow up and accept that fact. Put your thinking caps on as to how you guys can enjoy the holidays and have fun. Here in Philly we have a lot of free things to see and visit. What does your area have? Homemade gifts are wonderful and A.C. Moore and Michael’s have so many ideas and crafts.

Now is the time to really make some decisions as to how your holiday is going to be. Stop thinking about what your kids want and the world says you have to do and focus more on how your actions are viewed by God. And no, God is not interested in our kids having a bunch of stuff for one day. And if you don’t believe me then read the Bible and see what it has to say, about our responsibility to our children and how we are to raise them.


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Monday's Blog: Sharon will be back with more great "Financial Wisdom" for us"

I Must Confess!

I have a confession to make.

A couple of weeks ago I woke up with such a feeling of dread and self doubt over the decision I made to homeschool my daughter, Mali.

It was crazy!!

I was preparing to start our school day when all of a sudden it hit me like a bag of bricks! I began to think that keeping Mali home and homeschooling her was the craziest idea I ever had, and I was wrong to think this was what was best for her. I began to have thoughts of her not learning enough and to think that she was behind other children her age. In that short period of time, I had convinced myself she needed to go back to a brick and mortar school environment and be taught by a REAL teacher. Yes, I even had thoughts of inadequacy to teach my own 7th grader.

I began to pray, “Lord, help me even in my periods of doubt and unbelief!”

Have you ever been there? Have you ever prayed to God for direction as to which path to take or how to handle a certain situation? You received an answer from Him, but then begin to doubt that it was God who has provided this revelation?

You don’t have to answer that question but I am sure that I am not alone. LOL!

So here I am praying and asking God to take away my moment of fear and doubt. The truth is...I knew this was just another trick of the enemy in an attempt to distract and take me off track as to what God had clearly outlined for me and Mali. My decision to homeschool was not made lightly and after much prayer I was assured this was the path He wanted me to take. Therefore since I knew all of these things to be true, it would reason the doubt and fear I felt had to be a lie and not from God.

I would like to describe my moment as a moment of temporary insanity! LOL!

I felt so ashamed over my little episode; I posted about it on the local homeschool message board to see if I was alone in having this type of experience. Well, the response was immediate! I was so relieved to find that MANY parents have had this very same experience. It’s so funny because one parent even wrote that she has been homeschooling for many years and still suffers with moments of fear and doubt. She says that it typically happens 6-8 weeks into the school year initially and then again sometime around spring break. Ironically, my little “attack” happened right around the 6 week mark. Wow, that must make me normal! LOL!

Stories began to pour in about all the different reasons people chose to homeschool, and each parent explained it was because of those reasons they are reminded that their decision was the right one. I began to reflect on my own reasons (social and academic) and reminded myself why I made the decision to provide Mali with an education that caters to her individual learning style and protect her from some of the social issues she has encountered. I researched and found all the right tools to create a great curriculum for her. I have fully invested my time and efforts to make sure that the plan is a success and most importantly, I have prayed fervently for direction.

I then began to reflect on what we have accomplished so far.

Mali is LEARNING! She is a beast when it comes to math and aces all of her assessments. She also loves science and is learning and retaining everything that we have covered so far. She doesn’t care too much for studying grammar, vocabulary and language arts. And as a result we often find ourselves in a daily struggle to make it through those subjects. Fortunately, I see what the problem is and I’ve been able to take the time necessary to work with her and she is making progress. The truth be told, the school year is going great!

So why did I ever allow myself to become a victim of fear and doubt?

I don’t know? I will probably have several more moments like this one. Why? Because I love my daughter and I really want what’s best for her. I want to help her to reach every goal and become the successful young lady that God has created her to be. I don’t want to fail her. I just have to remember that the Lord is my strength and I can do all things through HIM!


Until the next time,
Sasha

I will be back very soon with another "Single Homeschool Mom" blog, hope to see you then!


Friday's Blog: Ponnie, has a special blog that you won't want to miss.

What's for Dinner?

There’s one question that echoes through my mind several times a day—first thing in the morning, midday at work, and even as I’m drifting off to sleep. And it’s the one question I can guarantee Kaiya will ask every single day. “What’s for dinner?”

Breakfast is usually easy, lunch is mostly leftovers but what’s for dinner? Is not always so easy to answer. I’m a pretty decent cook, if I say so myself. I learned from my mother who learned how to cook when she was so small she needed a step stool to reach the stove! My mom’s innovation is one of the reasons why I’m interested in nutrition as a career. She switched to whole wheat bread and brown rice years before the current “whole grains” movement. She also stopped using fatty meats to season her vegetables and replaced them with smoked turkey. When Crisco shortening and vegetable oil were still the most common oils used for cooking, my mom was already using olive and canola oils well before they became popular in the United States. So, hats off to you mom, I salute you!

Back to “What’s for dinner?” Most days I’m a combination of G. Garvin, Paula Deen (minus the extra butter and bacon) and Rachael Ray (minus the perky cuteness). I must admit there are days, (at least once a week) where I can barely muster up the energy for Chef Boyardee, and opening up one of his canned meals. LOL! (By the way, he was a real person; google him when you get a chance.)

Last night my Facebook status read: “I really need to start intensive cooking classes with the kid... I would prefer to eat a bowl of cereal and some fruit and be done with it tonight. Oh well....” But I’ve also “facebooked” about the Dinner Fairy, asking people to please return this elusive imp to my house so she can cook for me and my family. Judging from the feedback concerning the Dinner Fairy, I’ve found that I’m not alone when it comes to not having the time, energy or creativity to fix a home cooked meal for my family. So, what do you do when faced with the question “What’s for dinner?” And you find yourself drawing a blank? Here are a few suggestions I hope will help us working single mom.

1. Leftovers – Yes, the sometimes dreaded leftovers. If you’re eating a meal for more than 1 day in a row it can become despised and cause a revolt, LOL! However, Kaiya and I will actually have leftovers tonight; a meal we’re looking forward to. I made chili using ground turkey and added lentils to the kidney beans for extra protein and fiber. I only have to drum up a vegetable and starch. Delish!

2. Half cooked meal – I’m not suggesting you eat foods half cooked (smile), I’m referring to buying your entrée at the supermarket or restaurant (rotisserie chicken, or whatever tickles your fancy) and cooking your sides at home. You have a mostly home cooked meal without all of the fuss!

3. Fend for yourself night – Now this only works if you have a child who can make a sandwich, pop something in the microwave, or fix a bowl of cereal. If you have small children, please hold off on this tip. ~Smile~

4. Breakfast for dinner- Now this is one of my favorite things to do. Most mornings I grab cereal or a boiled egg and off to work I go; however dinner time is the perfect time to fix all of your favorite breakfast treats that would normally have you feeling sleepy by 10 A.M., LOL!

5. Ask your friends what’s on their dinner menu- Seriously, ask them! My creativity has soared many times while talking to friends. Friends are good resources for tried and true recipes, and meal suggestions.

6. Slow cookers are your friend - Slow cookers are awesome but neglected appliances. Put your food in before you leave for work; come home to a house smelling like someone slaved in the kitchen all day long. How cool is that? It also frees your time so you can complete other chores or spend quality time with the family.

7. Have the family help you in the kitchen- This is the tip I personally need to follow. Granted it’s usually easier and faster to throw a meal together solo; but cooking together is a great way to bond with your kids and teach cooking skills at the same time.

Do you have any tips or creative ways to deal with dinner? If so, feel free to comment on this blog. Instead of trying to pull a rabbit out the hat every night, I will reflect on these tips (and I hope you will too) when faced with that dreaded question: “What’s for dinner?”


See you in 2 weeks,
Jennifer

I'll be back on Wednesday, November 3rd, hope to see you then!


Thursday's Blog: Sasha "Single Homeschool Mom"

What’s On Your To-Do List?

Most days I have a To-Do List whether it is scribbled in the recesses of my mind or on an actual piece of paper. This I find to be the case for most women. We might call it by different names, but a daily planner is still a To-Do list. It doesn’t matter if you are in Corporate America, the medical field, self-employed, a homemaker or retired, we all seem to have that list of things we have to get done, need to get done, want to get done, should get done and hope to get done in our daily lives.

If you are a woman who works outside the home full time you still have a list of things you need to or would like to accomplish in the evening and most times your weekend is full of things to do. If you are a stay at home mom and or a homeschooler, that list really seems to be long most days because on top of all the things you must do to run your household, you also have to school your children. The more people in your family, the more loads of clothes you have to wash, dry and iron. Dirty dishes appear every day no matter what. Meals need to be prepared, floors mopped, bathrooms cleaned, carpet vacuumed, furniture dusted, food shopped for, and that’s just the beginning; we haven’t even looked at errands to run….phew!! Retired women in most cases (not all) seem to have the best To-Do lists around. I’m sleeping in today, and going shopping with my girlfriend later on. Not cooking tonight, hubby is taking me to dinner. Single retired sisters, hum getting up early, fixing a nice breakfast, watching the Today Show, taking a shower, putting on a nice lounger and putting around all day long…LOL!! There are days like that but then again, retired doesn’t mean empty days of nothing, it often means days filled with great things to do.

We are the most busiest people in history. Well, that’s my opinion…LOL!! But what I want you to do is take a good look at your daily To-Do List and see how often you have listed a kindness for someone outside of your immediate family? How often each week do you take time to show love toward others? I ask this, because there seems to be a disconnect with us as Believers toward other people. The church building is becoming way too important to people versus what we should be doing outside the church building. We do all kinds of stuff in the church building with church people, but what I’m seeing is, we are not doing a whole lot for those on the outside. And in many cases we are forgetting those inside the church building as well if they are not around.

Even with our busy schedules (To-Do Lists), we should be finding time to minister to others. People are not impressed with us going to church. If you don’t believe me, just ask one of your unsaved neighbors how they feel about you going to church. But what people need to see is The Church in us. You know “The Church” the Messiah is coming back for. The one without spot or wrinkle, not the fine buildings we are so proud of. There are many people who are lonely whether they belong to a church congregation or not. It is very sad that Saints are lonely, but even more so for the world, because we are to be the light that draws them. How many of us who live in the city are praying for God to give us a home in the burbs because we are tired of the noise, drugs and mayhem? Can we all leave and the cities become even darker than they are? How many of us go to churches in neighborhoods that are not ours? So how can you be involved in that community if once church services are over you hop in your car and drive off? How well do you know your neighbors? I realize that everyone doesn’t have a neighbor right next door. Your closest neighbor could be 2 miles over and your church 15 miles away, yet it is still a community setting. But in most urban areas it is a different story all together.

With the upcoming holidays we have a tendency to be able to add quite a bit extra to our To-Do List, to accommodate our traditions, family and fun. And there is nothing wrong with that at all, but we also have a tendency to go back to life as usual when the holidays are over. And that leaves all the people who are hungry every day still hungry because we are no longer concerned with feeding them like we are at Thanksgiving and Christmas. Why do we think is so important to feed people for one day, versus every day? Seniors are still lonely because we have done our duty and visited and taken them gifts for the holidays. Mothers and their children are still living in shelters needing a helping hand to get on their feet.

‎When Mother Theresa of Calcutta was awarded the Noble Peace Prize (some 31 years ago), she said "If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one." You know what; we can do that one-by-one! We can volunteer in a soup kitchen or we can feed from our own kitchens.

I want to challenge us to make sure that we share the love of Christ on a daily basis as much as we can. The challenge is, starting next week, Monday to Friday; let us make sure that we add something to our daily To-Do List, which entails spreading the Love of our Lord. It could be a simple phone call every day to someone who is lonely, a card in the mail, inviting a sister over or out for a cup of coffee. It could be paying a bill for someone who is struggling, or buying them groceries. We are all at different stages in our lives and so are our finances. It doesn’t always take a lot of money to show the love of Christ. A kind word, a hug, a listening ear cannot be bought or stamped with a price tag.

How much of God’s business is on your daily To-Do List?



Love & Hugs
Ponnie


Wednesday's Blog: Jennifer is back for the "Single Working Mom"

Oh NO! It Can't Be! Part II

Part I posted on Monday, October 4, 2010

Hi Ladies, I promised to come back and finish sharing my experience of finding a lump in my breast on September 12th. So here I am....and here is the Part II of my testimony.

I pushed for my doctor to write orders for me to have a diagnostic mammogram. I couldn’t wait any longer! Fortunately, I was able to get an appointment that same day. My doctor stressed that she wanted me to have both a mammogram and an ultrasound.

Ladies, I have to admit, I was petrified while sitting in the waiting room. I may have seemed cool, calm and collected on the outside, but on the inside, I was a nervous wreck. The next hour would determine my future. I kept reassuring myself that no matter what, I was victorious in the Lord, and in the Spirit strong! Oh, but my flesh was weak.

I began to look around at all of the other women who sat in the waiting room with me. Black, White, old and young. I honestly thought I would be one of the youngest, but there was a young girl who looked to be in her early 20’s. Why is she here? I started praying for her and all the other women as well—praying for them seemed to help calm my nerves and take my mind off of me.

Okay, so finally it’s my turn. “That’s weird;” the technician says she doesn’t see anything. Well, good thing there was an ultrasound scheduled too because OBVIOUSLY the lump is a clear indication that there is something there, duh! The order was only written for the affected left breast, but the technician said, “We need to do the right one as well so we will have a comparison.”

As we proceeded with the ultrasound—there it was! On the screen for all the world to see. (Okay, not all the world, just me and the tech). “Hmmm,” the technician whispered, “Let me go get the doctor”. With those words my heart sank and I began to pray, “Lord, prepare for whatever news I am about to receive.”

The doctor came in, introduced himself and asked for permission to feel the lump. He then proceeded to redo the ultrasound exam, once again putting my lump on display. At that point he began to explain to me what he was seeing. “See this spot here (he pointed to a black hole on the screen), this is probably what we are feeling.” “And you see all of this here (pointing to a shadow behind the black screen); it looks like whatever it is, it’s starting to resolve itself.”

“LORD! Am I hearing this man correctly?! Resolving itself—does that mean it’s going away?!”

The next words the doctor spoke was just what I needed to hear, “I can assure you 99.9% that it is NOT cancer.” “There is a cyst but even that appears to be resolving itself” “Let’s do this again in 3 months to make sure there aren’t any changes and to see if it is completely gone. But otherwise, everything is okay.”

“THANK YOU JESUS!!!” All is well.....or is it?

I got dressed and went to go tell my mother the good news (she works in the hospital). I had just given her the news when my phone rang. It was the technician. “Sasha, come back. The doctor reviewed the film of your right breast and he found something and wants to do an ultrasound on that breast as well”. My quick celebration immediately turned to an “Oh, No!” They weren’t even supposed to scan that breast!!

Well, long story short, it turned out to be another cyst in my right breast as well. We will do a follow up on that in 6 months. I only inserted this piece of info to remind you that mammograms are necessary to screen for any abnormal changes. Women need to make sure that we not only do self breast exams to feel for lumps but also need yearly mammograms to detect anything that we can’t feel. I didn’t feel this lump with a self-exam.

So that’s my story. Today, I am well and cancer free! Hallelujah and Thank you Lord!! Am I going to spend time worrying about the outcome 3 months from now? NOPE! Because God is teaching me not to worry about tomorrow. And as a good friend told me to do during this trial, I am striving to live in the today!

My story has ended on a positive note, but I realize that there might be someone reading this whose story ends differently, it could be that you may have recently found a lump as well or gotten a call back for an abnormal screen. I want you to know that if your first thought is to be afraid and scared that is a normal and a most human reaction to the situation. I know, because that’s what happened to me. When I first found the lump, I was ready to cancel my birthday celebration (which I didn’t by the way). I was sad, depressed and had a serious woe is me attitude initially — that’s until God gave me the scripture 1 Peter 1:6-9, but I want to share verses 6. So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while.

My best advice is that you must fight to cast down your thoughts of fear and depression and bring them unto submission to Christ. And yes, it might be easier said then done. That is where you need your friends and family to help you stay strong and agree with you in prayer. Sisters, may you find peace and comfort in knowing that God loves you. The diagnosis, the prognosis and the treatment may be hard at times, but God is in the midst of it all, despite what it looks like. Strive to place all of your cares on the Lord and enjoy the life that God has given to you TODAY, trying your best not worry about tomorrow...He has each day under control!

A special note to the sister who thinks something might not be right (feels any type of abnormalities), GO GET IT CHECKED OUT! Don’t be afraid! Early detection is key to a good prognosis. If you don’t have insurance, please go anyway! There are several programs available to help the uninsured or underinsured. I am attaching a link that has FAQ’s about mammograms and resources: http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/factsheet/Detection/mammograms

One last thing, please do me a favor—as soon as you finish reading this blog. If you don’t know how to do a self breast exam, google “Self Breast Exams,” and perform one on yourself. Do it today, and then do it monthly. Again…Early detection is key!



Be blessed Sisters!
Sasha

I will be back on Monday, November 1st, hope to see you then!


Tuesday's Blog: Special blog by Ponnie

Batten Down the Hatches!

First I must warn you that I really don’t know too much about “Maritime” history, but from all the movies I’ve seen that had to do with ships and bad weather, there is one call that has been constant, “Batten down the hatches!” What does, “batten down the hatches!” mean? In a nutshell, “prepare for trouble!” I’m not sure the ship Nehemiah tried to hid from God on had hatches or not, but I am sure if they did, everyone was trying their best to batten them down. ~Smile~

Life’s journey often runs into stormy waters and if we not careful to batten down the hatches, we could lose a lot.

The disciples were on a ship with the Messiah (He was asleep) and when the storm began to toss their boat to and fro they became afraid and cried for Him to do something. Do we not find ourselves fearful and afraid in the midst of trials and tribulations? Of course we do. I know, I know, I Timothy 1:7, tells us that God did not give us a spirit of fear, (that afraid fear) but He knew that fear and being afraid was something we as human beings would have to deal with in our lives. Why else would there be so much in the Bible about “fear not” or “don’t be afraid”? So the next time someone tells you they are fearful or afraid about something, don’t be so quick to tell them God doesn’t give us a spirit of fear. Instead listen! See if you can encourage them to transfer their fear and anxiety onto the Lord. Yes, Paul tells us that God does not give us a spirit of fear, but it doesn’t say we won’t be fearful. Paul wanted us to know where that afraid kind of fear came from. But there is also a good healthy fear. Oh yes, because what kind of fear do you think Proverbs 1:7, is speaking of when it says, “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge?” It can’t be the shaking in your boots gonna pee your pants; I’m scared kind of fear.

Fear and unbelief are something we battle with all through our lives. No matter how spiritual you are or how long you’ve been walking with the Lord, it comes up and we have to deal with it. When trouble strikes we are going to have some type of reaction to it. You get a pink slip and lose your job. Your first thought is, “Okay Lord, I know you have this covered. Might be a surprise to me, but it is not one to you.” You start the process of skimming the fat in your budget, because unemployment is only a percentage of what you were actually making on your job. You sharpen up your résumé and begin sending it out and applying for jobs. You have faith in God and your trust is in Him. You have done all that you know in the natural to “batten down the hatches”.

The jobless days begin to turn into weeks and the weeks begin to turn into months. The seasons change and now you have high heating bills and in the reality of ends barley meeting you are watching your bank account begin to dwindle away, and it’s all starting to take its toll. Things are compounded with the realization that your unemployment payments will soon end. I would be hard pressed to believe that in this situation that fear and unbelief have not been rearing their ugly heads. I don’t think one could honestly say that it has not been a daily struggle at some point to “batten down the hatches” (close down) on fear or unbelief. So, again I admonish you to not be so fast to quote “I Timothy 1:7” to your sister when she is riding out a storm in her life and she is afraid. Please listen!

Whenever you are watching a movie where a ship is in trouble the captain is usually shouting at the top of his lungs, “All hands on decks!! Batten down the hatches!!” You will notice that everyone jumps to save the ship and their lives. Even if there had been conflict between each other earlier, everyone at this point is on one accord. That’s the way it should be for us as Believers, we should jump to help our sisters “batten down their hatches” in the midst of their storms.

Times are very hard right now for a lot of people all over the world. And maybe even more so for our sisters next door or the sister who sits next to us every Sunday in church. As daughter’s of the Most High we should ban together to help out one another, (all hands on deck). When the storms, trials, tribulations and troubles of this life go on for a length of time, that is when we begin to grow weary, and our faith can waver, and we might even begin to doubt God’s love for us. Depression, anxiety, and fear can also begin to set in. This is why we need to be there to help each other “batten down the hatches” so we don’t feel so alone.

There are many ways we can help one another. For one, become a safe place where people can talk honestly without fear of judgment. Be an ear where someone can cry and share how they are afraid, or they are doubting God’s love for them. We all have some type of understanding in that area, because I’m sure that all of us have been afraid, and have doubted God’s love at one point or another in our spiritual walk. We may not be so quick to own up to that fact, but nonetheless it is true. Another way is pitching in to be of assistance where we can. And last but not least, if they are having financing hardships we should be willing to help. Everyone in the Body is not financially strapped. Some of us do have money in the bank or a few extra dollars we can give to someone else if we make a sacrifice. I have been in situations where I have needed big bucks and times when $10 in the mail, was like someone sending me $100. We can be a very selfish and self-centered as people when we want to. That is why James warns us that to see someone in need and we don’t give, it profits nothing. James 2:15-16

Just like in maritime times, everyone is needed to “batten down the hatches” in order to save the people and the ship, so is it the same for us when trouble comes. We need each other to ride the storm or troubles out. We need “all hands on deck” so that a sister will not fail in heart and begin to lose her faith as she becomes overwhelmed trying to “batten down her hatches” all by herself.

My prayer for you today is that if you are someone who is in the midst of a storm and needs a helping hand; do not be afraid to ask for it. Seek God’s guidance as to who you should ask, (that is very important). And if you are one who can be of help to someone (more than just praying for them) then step up and help your sister. All hands on deck!



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Monday's Blog: Sasha, "Healthy Lifestyles" Part II of her story on finding a lump in her breast

How Long and Why?

How long should you homeschool? I think a lot of people aren’t sure what the answer to that question is. The truth of the matter, there is no one size fits all answer. You could homeschool to prepare your children to attend school; it could be for one semester to fill in for an energy situation. It could be for just one school year, or until they are ready to attend high school. And often it could be for their entire elementary education, until you see them off to college. There is no one size fits all.

The above picture is of my 5 year old granddaughter on her first day of school this past September. She was excited and rearing to go. How did she come about this great confidence and preparedness? I homeschooled her for 8 months preparing her for that day. When we started out she could not use scissors, tie her shoes, draw, identify money or read. But she is a very bright child, she had just not been taught these things. But then on the other hand she could count up to 100, spell her name, recognized all letters of the alphabet (upper case and lower case), knew all shapes and colors and she was so eager to learn. What I found early on in teaching her, was that her self-esteem was low and when she didn’t master something right away she became frustrated and felt she would never learn. During that 8 month period, I constantly told her how smart she was and that she would know how to read before she started school and everything else we were going over.

Her last day with me and 2 weeks before she started school we celebrated all her achievements by going out to lunch and letting her buy a couple of things at the dollar store with the money I had given her. She was so very excited because she was reading, her imagination had been stimulated and her drawing ability had soared. She could tie her shoes, sit and watch a movie for 1.5 hours, follow instructions and glowed in the daily routine we had setup. And today she loves school and is having a wonderful time! A lot of what they are doing is things she has already learned and her self-esteem continues to flourish.

Tovah (my youngest) was homeschooled until she started 8th grade. I started teaching her at a very early age; she could read before she was 5 years old. And though in her early years she went to preschool, I did not rely on them to give her what she needed, I still taught her in the evenings and on weekends.

I have friends who homeschooled their children from preschool to 12th grade. And I know of a family that homeschooled their son for only 1 year because the school they wanted him to attend did not have room for him in a particular grade and he had to wait a school year.

One year I helped a woman transfer her son into Cyber School because she was afraid that he was going to be attacked by a gang of boys. He had not attended school for over 4 weeks.

Contrary to popular belief, you do not have to homeschool your children for their entire elementary education if that is not what you want to do. Personally, I had no idea how long I would homeschool Tovah and even when she did start attending school, I still did not know until last year that she would not return to homeschooling. For one, it has been a financial struggle to pay tuition, and each year I had to see what God said about it. And each year someone has aided with tuition. Even last year her principal gave Tovah a substantial scholarship because it really looked as though she was going to have to leave and finish up high school as a homeschooler. It was a door that I did not close until 11th grade was well on its way.

The option to homeschool can be a God send to a child who is in trouble. I often wonder when I hear of a young person who commits suicide from being harassed and hounded in school, why didn’t their parents take them out of that environment and homeschool them? I have come to the conclusion that often people don’t really know that this is an option for them. And if you are in public school, they are not going to tell you it’s an option because they don’t want to lose the funding when your child transfers.

If you have been sending your child/children to private school and they close or financially you can no longer afford it, most often you may not want your child to attend the public school in your area and homeschooling is an option until you can figure out something else that is more conducive for your child and family.

How long you homeschool can range from 1 semester to 15 years (including preschool and K).
Why you homeschool can be anywhere from religious beliefs, getting a better education, special needs, to fear for your child’s safety.

Today my goal was to hopefully broaden peoples understanding and perspective on homeschooling, to see that it is a viable option for many people, not just a particular group of people.

I have an upcoming eBook “Single Parents Can Homeschool Too!” Look for it in the early part of 2011.


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Next Thruday: Another great homeschooling story, but you will have to tune in to see who writes it! ~Smile~

Friday's Blog: An encouraging word for all women!

I Love Me Some ME!!!

On Face Book a friend’s profile information begins with…I love me some Me!!! And any given day she will post it as her profile status. It seems to be her theme for life and at times she makes it a daily reminder. So, thinking about us as single (and married) women in the Body of Christ—I think all of us should have that mindset. What about it sisters? Should we be proclaiming on a daily bases that “I Love Me Some ME?! I say, “YES!”

After making the decision to write about this catchphrase, I wasn’t sure what the next step should be. So, like any up-to-date, savvy internet person (LOL!!), I did a google search. Yes, I know, so very creative. ~Smile~ Well, a slew of junk came up but what caught my eye was the “I Love Me Some Me” group Tyra Banks started back in March of this year. Click—and I was in. What I found were about 178 messages and I started to peruse through them to see what the ladies were talking about. Sad to say, “I was very disappointed.” Most of the messages had to do with loving your body or not loving your body. Message after message talked about struggling with weight and low self-esteem, and then I realized that was the theme of the group. Ooops! It was “I Love Me Some Me…Body!” Kiss all the body parts that you can and tell yourself, “I love me some me.” But there was one woman who wrote about how she had experienced some very hard times in life and found herself broken at times. And yet, she is now learning to love herself and be strong through the things she learned in the hard times. Wow!! Now you’re talking.

Loving your body for what it is definitely is part of loving yourself, but it can’t be the main focus. There are just too many things about the human body that we have no control over—parse. The average woman cannot afford massive plastic surgery, nor should we want it, but that is what our world becomes when we focus on the outward body — when we make it an idol of sorts. The main focus on our bodies should be that we take care of them the best we can. We should love ourselves enough to work on getting excess weight off, exercising, eating for health, and looking our best. But, our self love must run much deeper than our outward shell if it is to transform how we live and enjoy this life that God has given us.

Exactly what does “I love me some me,” mean? I would think it holds something different for everyone, but there are some common threads. For starters we should accept who we are. This doesn’t mean there is not room for improvement or change, but that we stop looking at what is not right or what we feel is not working and take a long look at, what is good and working for us. That we begin to believe what the Bible says about us and rebuke what the world says. Make ourselves a top priority in our lives. This does not mean we are to be selfish and self-centered, but it does mean that we nurture and care for ourselves as we do our children and others. In other words, stop putting ourselves on the back burner of life.

As I looked at myself I realized there is a combination of outward love and inward love that needs to happen to make us whole and gives balance to our lives. But a total focus on just one or the other will leave a gap. I know women who make sure a good portion of their wages are spent on their hair, nails, makeup, perfume, clothes, shoes, entertainment and shopping. Yet, they still are empty inside though outwardly they are done to the nines. On the other side, I know women who dedicate their lives to serving the Lord and neglect their outward selves and it shows in their lack of confidence around other women, because they stand out as frumpy or not well kept. As with everything in life, even in our self love we need to strive for balance.

I’m in the process of reading a cookbook, (Yes, I read cookbooks…LOL!) The Perfect Recipe for Losing Weight & Eating Great by Pam Anderson. She is a renowned chef who for years struggled with her weight and self-esteem, but lost close to fifty pounds in a year and at the time she wrote this book she had already kept the weight off for five years. It is a good book and if you desire to lose weight by changing your lifestyle (not dieting) then this might be a good match for you. I purchased it used, (used like new) from a 3rd party at amazon.com and it was the best few bucks I’ve spent in awhile. One of the things she talked about was starting with working on the outside you, because that is something we can do immediately. We can start with something as simple as putting on lipstick and decent clothes if you are one who is home more. That’s me! I have days when I know I’m not going out, I tend to not care so much what I have on, and lipstick never enters the picture. But she made a valid point of starting out with little things to encourage yourself. So starting next week, I’m going to make sure I dress every day unless we have a day of heavy rains. Then I like to stay in my jammies. ~Smile~

You might be one who is a high maintenance sister, and really doesn’t need to change much on the outside, but there is not one of us who does not need work on the inside. After all, we are a work in progress.

My prayer for you my dear sisters is that you will begin each day by proclaiming, “I Love Me Some ME!” and you begin to peruse just exactly what that entails for you as an individual. I have a feeling that with our focus directed on us in a more positive light, you may find more satisfaction in your life! And as time goes on that satisfaction will turn to joy, and we won’t have so many single women in the Body of Christ who are miserable and so very joyless. I Love Me Some ME takes time, effort, and work, but you are worth it!


Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Hope to sit with you again on Wednesday, October 27th.


Thursday's Blog: Ponnie, "Homeschooling"

People of Our Word!

What I have noticed of late there seems to be a rash of people in the Body who are not people of our word. We say we are going to do something and we don’t. Some of us will at least apologize or make excesses as to why we didn’t come through or are late, but then there are times we act as if we never gave our word and “So what!”

When I was growing up I often heard the saying, “A man (or woman) is known by their word.” Or “A man’s word is his bond.” It was very important to be known as someone who did what they said they would. It was sort of black and white back then, either you told the truth and were dependable or a liar and not trusted.

One of the biggest and most consistent lies I believe that is told inside the church building is, “I’ll be pray for you!” Those five words just roll off the tongue like butter, but often they are not true. Now when we make this statement do we plan to do it? I think in most cases we do, but we just too often don’t. I feel that if we stop telling people we are going to pray for them and just stick to I Timothy 1:1-3, we will be okay.

James instructs us to always make “If God wills….I will” the “precursor” to any plans we make regarding the future. I think because we often omit “If God wills” we set ourselves up to fail. Anything can happen or arise in the time you have told someone you would do something. Prime example, on Friday, October 29th, a girlfriend of mine plans to drive me, Tovah and my granddaughter to Baltimore, MD, for an open house at Loyola University. We have both agreed, “If God wills, it will happen.” Why? Because between now and then anything can come up that would prevent her from driving us. Would she be a person who did keep her word? Nope! Since we agreed that if God wills this trip will happen, then if it doesn’t no one is going to be bent out of shape. See, how He takes care of us! If only we would follow what He says. ~Smile~

Why is it important to be people of our word? Because we are imitators of Christ and He was a person of His word on this earth. We are instructed to walk in love with one another, so to say we are going to do something and don’t just because we changed our mind or didn’t feel like it, is not walking in love or being honest. Also when we don’t keep our word, people are disappointed and often have some kind of feelings about us. Their perception can range from “You are a liar. You lied to them and you lied to God! Or, grace and mercy can step in!” But too often our flesh takes us in the opposite direction of grace and mercy. ~Smile~

Personally at times it is a struggle for me to not want to hold people accountable when they don’t come through, but as I’m growing in the Lord I’ve learned to give grace to the offender. But there are times we need to hold someone accountable, especially when we see a pattern of this behavior. In other words, we need to pull their coattail—But in love of course. Not when we find ourselves angry or upset because they did it again. As parents we need to make sure our children understand how important it is to “think before they agree to do something, and to keep their word as best they can, once they have given it.” Hold them accountable.

I have a question for you my sisters, how are you known for your word? Are you dependable to the point that people know when you say you will do something as long as it is within your power they can count on you? Or are you the last person people come to when they are really in need because you are just not dependable? Do you tell people you will be somewhere at such-a-such time, but you leave them hanging because you are always late? Are you a woman of many excuses because you are forever not keeping your promises? How often do you disappoint your children because you say you are going to do something and then you don’t?

Not being people of our word, is a very poor testimony as to how we are living to please God.

If any of this has hit home with you, I hope you will begin to not be so fast to say you will do something without counting the cost, and when you do say you are going to do something then strive to keep your word.

My grandmother had an old saying about folks who didn’t keep their word. “Her word is like a pie curst—easily broken”

All of God’s daughter’s should be known as “People of their word!” Can that be said about you?



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Wednesday's Blog: Ponnie "Single and Loving It!"