Lord, Help My Unbelief

There was a man whose son was processed by an unclean spirit, which made him do all sorts of things. He brought him before Yeshua (Jesus) to be healed and after the father answered the Lord’s question of how long the child had suffered with this, their conversation went something like this…Yeshua said to him. “If you can believe all things are possible to him who believes.” Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, “Lord I believe; help my unbelief!” Read Mark 9:14:29

Personally I think we would all fair well to incorporate into our daily prayers, “Lord, I believe, but help my unbelief!” We all struggle with some level or form of unbelief in our lives.

The truth is none of us really knows how deep our faith is until tested. It is easy to say, “I know that God loves and cares for me” until your husband leaves you for another woman or man. It’s not hard to say, “I trust you Lord” while you are getting a paycheck each week—but, when you lose your job and end up living in a shelter or your car, it is a different story. It is easy to feel that God is a caring and loving God, until the unexpected loss of a child. There are so many things in this life that can sake our faith, if only for a minute. But most of us struggle on a daily bases to “believe” something!

How often do we lose sleep after the monthly bills come in? How much time to we spend worrying about past due notices or our children? Have you ever faced the possibility of eviction? Trust me, it is not pretty. The thought of living in a shelter is not something most would want to do, but to come to the place of acceptance that if that is where you have to go—and it must be okay with God is huge. I’ve lived many years and the one thing it has taken me almost a lifetime to know without a doubt…is that God’s ways are not my ways. His plans are not my plans. And truthfully most of the time, I don’t have a clue and all I can do is my best to believe God’s Word. So when things are looking askew I often find myself asking God to help me in my unbelief!

When I agreed to not have an abortion (at age 40 and unmarried) and have my baby (Tovah), I had no idea how things would play out. And trust me; it has all been a great surprise to me. I was a manger for a large retail chain, making good money. I had worked hard all my life and was just starting to see some of the fruits of my labor. But then with one poor decision with man and one right decision for God it all seemed to go south. I had to give up that good paying job, couldn’t pay my rent, etc. There is much more to the story but we don’t have time, so I’m going to do a “reader’s digest” version. Life was never the same once Tovah was born, we lived in subsidized housing for several years, I worked part-time for a few years and then we started homeschooling. I was also involved in inner city missions. Financially I never recovered. It seemed that I was always one step away from being poor. And some days it seemed as though I was poor.

Today, I know that He used these years to build up my trust and faith in Him. He used many scenarios (some I would have like to have skipped) to build my character and use me to help Tovah be the young woman that she has become. I’m not sure I would have been able to assist her and instill the laws of God the same way if I were working long hours and she was in the “before and after” school programs on top of a long school day, or home alone as a teen? Only God knows and He chose to do things differently then I would have thought.

Tovah will be going off to college in a few months and I have no monies saved for retirement. There are times “self” wants to fret and worry about that, but I must remind “self” that God has always been faithful to me and I must continue to “believe”! But on those days I find it hard to remember, I cry out, “Lord, I believe, but help me in my unbelief!”

Sisters, if you are finding yourselves in a place of “unbelief” don’t continue to stay there. Get into your Bibles and read! Pray! Remember the things that God has already done for you! Talk to someone who has a greater faith than yours, so they can encourage you. I’ve found that those with great faith in God, have experienced some hard times walking with Him and they have a great testimony for us.

Lord, we believe, but help us with our unbelief!



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

See you Monday!!!