A Mother's Love

Repost from May 2010...enjoy!

In celebration of Mother’s Day, I am tasked to write this month about a mother’s love. I must be honest...this has been one of the hardest blogs for me to write so far. For days, I have been thinking about what I wanted to write about...even prayed that God would give me the right words to say...but nothing came to mind. As much as I love my children, Zachary and Mali, I simply could not determine what to talk about!

Do I talk about the day that they came into my life and changed me forever? Do I discuss the day that I met each of them and instantly fell in love with them? Or should I discuss the day that each of their adoptions became final and how emotional I felt when the judge officially made me their mother?

They are 13 and 15 now...maybe I will write and reflect about the infant and toddler years. How happy I was when they said their first words or how proud I was the first time that they rolled over, began to crawl and took their first steps. The kids love for me to tell them stories of when they were “little”. I thank God for all of those memories and for the chance to experience each one of them. So many milestones achieved during those early years...too many to put into a blog...

So what do I talk about?

Maybe I will talk about their school years. More major milestones achieved! I can remember how emotional I was the first time I dropped Zachary off at his Kindergarten class. I am sitting here and I am reminded of how, after many struggles in Kindergarten, Mali finally realized that she could read and how my heart swelled with joy. I have to smile when I think about the numerous violin and band concerts, PTA performances, dance recitals and how, no matter how many kids were there, I only saw mine. (I loved to see their faces light up when they saw me in the crowd.) Even now...I tear up ever time I see Mali dance...she is so graceful...more than I will ever be. And to this day, I think Zachary is by far the BEST alto sax player in his band...I’m just saying. *smile*

All of those things are great…but they don’t really talk about a mother’s love, do they?

Let’s see...maybe I will talk about the sacrifices of a mother to show a mother’s love.
The nights that I didn’t sleep because I chose to sit up all night holding Zachary up during his bouts with asthma and bronchitis just so he could stop coughing and get some sleep...or the nights that I walked back and forth to Mali’s room just to make sure she wasn’t having a seizure. The many nights staying in a hospital room on the pediatric ward...the many doctor’s appointments. The decision not to date in order to protect their hearts and to spend more time with them. Not buying that Coach purse because the kids needed new shoes. Taking trips to Disney World and buying LOTS of souvenirs when I would have much rather gone on an adult trip to the Caribbean....I’m STILL making sacrifices for one or the other, year after year!!! (But they will only be kids once, right?) *smile*

All examples of a mother’s love...but I wouldn’t dare write about those experiences because I don’t want to come across as complaining. You see, even though I made those sacrifices for them....I am thankful for the opportunity and I would do it all over again...so, I won’t write about them.

I know...I know...maybe, I will talk about a mother’s love and the power of a praying mother. Maybe I will talk about the countless hours of praying for them to be healed...and once they were healed, praying that God would keep them healthy. Perhaps I should talk about how I begin to pray the minute they walk out the door to go to school for their protection or that they will make good decisions while they are there, the many prayers that they will pass their test or that a friend (or foe) won’t hurt their feelings today. I’ve prayed many times to parent them effectively so that they will grow to be a strong, successful, Christian man and woman. And I’ve prayed about the many times that I may not have parented them so effectively. Seems like so much of my day is spent praying for my babies....but maybe I won’t write about that because isn’t that what a mother is supposed to do.

Maybe I will talk about the pain of a mother’s love. Last night on the news they reported that a mother’s son was found after missing since Jan. 31st. His truck and body were recovered from a lake behind the college that he attended as a freshman. I cry because I have babies too and I can only imagine her pain. It’s a mother’s love that makes you cry when you hear of another mother’s pain...

Hmmm...maybe I should talk about how even while writing this blog, the tears begin to flow...because I am so thankful for my babies.

Sigh...I’m so frustrated. I love my children more than anything...they are two of the greatest people that I have in my life. As I said before, I love the fact that God chose me to be their mother and I thank Him everyday for the opportunity to parent them and yet, I can’t figure out not one thing to write about to express that love.... HELP!



Until the next time,
Sasha

Wednesday's Blog: Cheryl...being raised by a single mom

They Always Seem to Have a Song

This past weekend I was awaken Saturday and Sunday by a bird singing its heart out before 6am. I didn't mind so much Saturday, but by Sunday morning I felt myself becoming annoyed with all the noise it was making—Errrr, I wanted to sleep in a little bit! But then it hit me, this is God’s creature and it seems to be very happy that it is alive. Also, it was sitting on top of utility wires, in the back of the house were there are no trees. So, not only has this bird taken up residency in the not so plush back alley, it has a great song to sing. Wow! That made me think about us as God’s children and how we don’t sing and praise Him so much through the hard and lean times.

There are huge trees right outside my door, yet this bird loves singing in the back where there are no trees. I have owned a couple of parakeets over the years and found that birds are very social creatures, whether they are domestic or free. Years ago, I lived on the top floor of a five story brownstone which had a back balcony off my kitchen. One day while preparing breakfast, I head a bird singing and I wasn’t familiar with the sound it was making and when I peeked out the door, it was a bluebird. They are here in the city of Philadelphia, but you don’t see them that often. I stood there and he sang for me. I remember feeling so blessed by that. Well, he started coming every day as long as it didn’t rain and he would sit in the tree across from me and sing until I came to the door. He did this from the spring until the fall of that year.

Birds are not only social they mate for life. When they are flying south in the fall, if a bird is sick or becomes injured the mate and one other bird will leave the flock and stay with them until it’s able to fly again or dies. The two left will join another flock going by.

God put such creativity and beauty into creating his birds, and made such provision for them from the very beginning—just as He has for us. But the one difference between them is…they don’t complain. They don’t feel sorry for themselves and they have a song in their hearts to sing each day. Wow….we can learn so much from them.

You know what? I want to be like that bird who sings in the back of my house. I want to be able to sing God’s praises no matter what is going on in my life. I want to have a song at all times for God. I want to be content with plenty or with a little. And most of all I want to believe with all my heart what Yeshua (Jesus) tells us in Matthew 6:25-26, 25“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food and your body more than clothing? 26Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are?” (NLT)

Do you wake up in the morning with a song of praise in your heart, or are you plagued with worry, doubt and unbelief? Do you grumble because it's Monday? It’s one thing to sing because we’re happy, but it sure is something else to sing when times are hard.



Love & Hugs
Ponnie

In honor of Mother's Day (USA) this upcoming Sunday, the next 4 blogs will be reposted blogs from our 2week Mother's Day special in 2010. Enjoy!

Tomorrow: Sasha Brown: A single mom of 2 adoptive children

The Love of a Teacher

This blog first posted February 10, 2010

Teacher….one that teaches; especially : one whose occupation is to instruct

I’ve wanted to be a teacher for as long as I can remember, right after wanting to be a ballerina and a princess of course. I grew up admiring the numerous teachers that I knew and also admiring my mom since I was homeschooled. Teaching seemed like a dream job to me. At first my thinking was, “You get to be the boss and everyone has to listen to you!” But as I grew older I realized that teaching is huge responsibility because you are instructing and molding the minds of others.

One of the major things that I LOVE about my school is how caring the teachers are. Pretty much any teacher is willing to help you outside of class, they all offer free tutoring, and they give you their personal phone numbers and email addresses in case you need to reach them. I love that they are all willing to go the extra mile to ensure that you succeed. My teachers demonstrate on a daily basis how much they love and care for us and want us to be the best students that we can be.

Job 36:22 says “God is exalted in his power. Who is a teacher like him?” God is the greatest instructor that we could ever have. God shows us how to live in His image everyday, and He is constantly testing us on what we know. I don’t know about you, but I have probably failed most of those tests. That’s why He left us a lesson plan for our lives, The Bible. Yeshua (Jesus) is also referred to as “teacher” numerous times throughout the New Testament. God sent Yeshua down to earth to teach us that we could not reach the Father but through Him. God is our ultimate teacher and I hope that we are all improving our grades on a daily basis.

However, there’s a big difference between our schools and God’s school. While you may be a bright intellectual and excel in a certain area, but in God’s school of learning you can’t skip a grade. You may have to redo a lesson 10 times before you get it right. You may be spiritually in the 10th grade for six years if that’s what it takes for you to grow to where God wants you to be. There is no easy way out when it comes to what God wants us to learn, but I for one cannot wait until our eternal “graduation” when we can sit before the throne of God and know that we have pleased our Father.

As I am now looking at colleges, I have all intentions to major in early childhood education. I aspire to be as great a teacher as my teachers have been to me. God has instilled a love of children into my heart and I cannot wait to be a teacher. Even at the school where I internship now, I lovingly refer to the children as “my kids.” Have you thanked some of your past teachers for the influence that they have had on your life? Have you taken the time to thank your head instructor, God, for the lessons that He has instilled in you? Why not take a moment to let them know that they are appreciated.

I am happy to report that Tovah is graduating from high school June 2nd and leaving for college August 25th!



Until next time...Love ya,
Tovah


Monday's Blog: Ponnie


The picture is: Tovah and Blanca of the singing group, "Group 1 Crew" at the 2009 Philadelphia "Revolve Tour"

Sometimes It Takes Years

There’s a part of my life that is very exciting right now. And it all has to do with a personal promise that God made to me almost 19 years ago.

When I found out that I was pregnant at the age of 39, not married and in the Church—fear said, “You must have an abortion!” But God and His love through others said, “Trust Me. I will not fail you.”

I was a baby Christian and I really had no point of reference what it meant to trust God? I didn’t know God and His ways. I knew of Him, but I didn’t have a clue as to who He really was. So, to agree to trust Him was a huge step for me. And in the beginning there were days along the way that I thought I had made the wrong decision. But I didn’t, because over the years I have learned that He is trustworthy and He is faithful!

It has been a long and rough road being a single mom at 40 and raising a child according to God’s blueprint for her life. I’ve had to make many sacrifices along the way. Please don’t misunderstand and think I’m trying to say, I have done so much more than anyone else. This is not the case. I know that all parents make sacrifices for their children. I’m just talking about the things that God asked of me. We did not live what is considered the normal route of life. We did full time missions, homeschooled, part-time missions, homeschooled and more. And all along the way, God has kept telling me to “Trust Him!”

When Tovah was around 5 years old, the Holy Spirit told me one day that she would be a teacher. Okay, we all love it when we receive something like that from God! And it is exciting when He lets you in on his plans—but as life moves on, we can begin to doubt. But I say, “Continue to believe!” As the years progressed and there was no college fund, let alone a savings of any kind, I knew that God was going to have to do something out of the ordinary for us. And He did!

Tovah’s move in date for college is August 25, 2011. She was awarded a full tuition honors and leadership scholarship at a Christian College. Through various grants her room and board and books have been covered. In an economy where jobs are hard to come by, (especially summer jobs for students) she started a part-time retail job this week and she still has a few more weeks before she graduates from high school.

I am so proud of God and Tovah—God because apart from Him, none of this would be happening and He has taught me how faithful He is, and Tovah because she is following God’s vision for her life. Her major is Early Childhood Education.

As I look back over the years and the many hard times we’ve experienced, I can now see how it all played a part in God’s master plan for Tovah’s life. How only He can get the credit for all that is unfolding.

Sisters, I want you to be encouraged and faint not when it comes to the promises of God. It may take years for things to come into play, but we must wait for God’s perfect timing. When you think about the promises He made to Abraham. Abraham never got to see all of them come to fruition—yet, he “believed God” and it was counted as righteousness to him. (Read Genesis)

Maybe you are one who is becoming tired and weary because it seems that nothing changes and life is just so hard all the time. I’m a living witness to tell you to not give up on God. He is faithful! And His plan for us does not always mean life will be easy. I can tell you for sure that the great promise He made to me when asking me not to have an abortion, never included the word “easy”.

God loves us, so very much that He sent His only begotten son (Yeshua/Jesus) so that we can have eternal life. And He didn’t stop there! He also sent His Holy Spirit to live within us so that we would experience the comfort and peace of the Lord until our Messiah’s return.

It has taken almost 19 years for me to see what God had promised me to bloom into the flower that it’s becoming. It was years of Him weeding, tilling the soil, and sending others to plant seed and water it for Him. It has been a along haul, but He has never failed me once in all those years.
Sisters, sometimes it take years for it to all come together and while we wait on the Lord, He ask that we not become weary and trust Him.



Love & Hugs

See you tomorrow!

Men and Women Do Make Great Friends!

This first posted September 1, 2010.

Contrary to popular belief – men and women can be just friends. I’m not talking about that kind of stuff where someone has been a lover and now you want to remain friends and become friends of the new girlfriend or the new boyfriend. That is a worldly concept and a bunch of mess. I’m talking about two who belong to God. Let me say that again, “Two who belong to God!”

I have a friend who is like a brother to me. We’ve known each other about 13 years and have been friends for close to 11 of those 13 years. And, “No” we have never been romantically involved and “No” he is not gay! But what he is, is a man of God. He just doesn’t say he’s is, he lives it. And that is very important my dear sisters. I want to share a little about our relationship (yes, I have his blessing) because we have lived out a great godly love for one another. And if we can do this, so can others because we all serve the same God whose desire is for us to live a holy life unto Him.

We’ll call him Jim. When I first met Jim it was in a Christian environment. We kept running into each other around other people and I could see that there was something different about him. For one, he was single had a lot going on for himself and yet he seemed to be oblivious to the women that kept circling like vultures because they deemed him, “a good catch.” He was too cool to be gay, so what was it about this guy? What I saw was the anointing on his life. And without a spiritual eye, you would have just thought it was his natural persona. ~Smile~

As time went on our friendship just sort of happened. No dates, no fantasies, no crushes, it just happened. So sorry if you thought there might be some romance in my story, because we all know that I love to write stories. In fact I consider myself to be a great storyteller, but today my dear sisters; I want you to get this in the reality of which it lives.

The first time we hung out was at a computer show, and Tovah was with us. It was just friends hanging out. I knew several people who knew him and they vouched for him as a man of valor with a heart for God. I didn’t meet him and then have to try to guess who he was so. I was privy to the inside track. Why? Because God would not have any of us to be deceived. Remember we have an enemy who is a great deceiver, just read what Eve had to say about him. Plus Tovah was used to being around him already through a school and church environment.

As time passed we began to hangout more and more, especially after he found out that I was a woman of discretion and not desperate for a man. See, I wasn’t trying to hook him—at all! He didn’t have the luxury of people vouching for me and my character; he had to wait to see who I really was.

Let me fast forward and sum it all up for you. Over the years we have been to the movies umpteen times with and without Tovah, car trips, all different aspects of live theater, play cards at my house, eat out, eat in (at my place) and just a lot of hanging out. We do fireworks most 4th of Julys, and a host of other fun stuff. But it is just that, plain fun. Most of the time we are impromptu with things we do, sometimes tickets are purchased in advance and also forgotten…LOL!! And we have a great love and respect for one another. And best of all, Tovah has been able to witness the gift of our friendship. She knows without a doubt that men and women can be “just” friends. And I can’t leave out the best part of our relationship and that is he has the gift of helps and he has been very instrumental in helping me over the years in ministry. It is nothing for him to help me pickup women who need to be rescued or take them places they need to go. There isn’t anything he wouldn’t do to help me and there are no strings attached to his love for me and Tovah. Yeah, it is the pure love that Timothy talks about…treat older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity. (see Timothy 5: 1-3 NIV). And the flip side of that coin is that I treat him as a brother with absolute purity. The purity that Timothy speaks of is “Purity of heart” and that is what we have toward each other and our relationship.

On thing I have learned over the years, and that is most people do not believe that a heterosexual male and a female can just be friends, “No”, not even in the Church do they just let you be friends. You get questions like, “Well, what’s going on with you and Jim?” Or I loved it when I had a new girlfriend and one day when we were just hanging out and having fun, she asked out of the blue, “What’s wrong with Jim?” I’m like, “What?” “You know, what’s the story, how come you two haven’t hooked up?” It was too funny, but it was also sort of the straw that broke the camel's back for me. So, now I always refer to him as my brother with people who don’t already know him. That way folks hear me talk about “my brother” and when they met him (we don’t look like we are related) that’s when I share that he is my brother in the Lord. Well, by then they don’t have any preconceived ideas or notions about us because they only heard “my brother”.

Sisters, the key to having a male friend in the Lord is that you are not searching for him. You are not one who is desperate for a man or to be married. As Elisabeth Elliot says, “A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man has to seek Him in order to find her.” Stop listening to a world racked with sin as to how your life should be. Don’t allow the well meaning sisters in the church who keep saying dumb things like, “We gotta get you married” or push you to feel desperate or unhappy about your position as a single (unmarried) woman. STOP listening to the voices! Learn to be content in your season of life. Now my situation is unique because we are both destined to be single, but I have friends who are married, that had the same type of friendship with their husbands before marriage. In fact one of my friend’s was having such a good time living the life God had given her as a single woman that when her husband asked her to marry him, she wasn’t sure she wanted to get married? God had to tell her, “He’s the one.”

I have been very blessed to have my friend “Jim” and that my daughter thinks of him as an uncle after all these years, but don’t take that I’m telling you to bring men into the lives of your children. In fact, I warn you very strongly to be very careful about that. It takes time to get to know people, and never rush into anything with anyone. A friend of mine shared that her pastor preaches that single women with children when being courted should spend a year of courtship before ever bringing their children into the relationship. And when I think about that, it makes an awful lot of sense to me. Sometimes as single moms, women are too quick to try to have some type of family and jump to incorporate men into their lives and the lives of their children. This is not good sisters. Why? Because you are to never intentionally let a wolf into the hen house. Why? Because he will destroy them. And Jesus warns us that there are wolves in sheep’s clothing “deceivers” and we are to be aware.

Today I wanted to share how you can be just friends with the opposite sex, but there is a criteria for it to work. First your heart must belong to God, and you are trustworthy. Meaning, you won’t drop God like a hot potato when a man comes a calling. And you will take things slow, allowing God to order your steps and be willing to walk where He leads. There are times when friendships turn into love and marriage, and then there are times when friendships just continue to grow in the realm of friends.

Sisters, God is in control and when we let go of the reigns, step back and allow Him to be God, life has the potential for the sky to be the limit!



Love & Hugs

See you tomorrow