Taking a moment to taste our words beforehand gives us time to judge how bitter or sweet they may be and choose whether or not to serve them. Being slow to speak keeps us from sin.
Our tongues like anything else in this world has a flipside to God’s intended use. We can use it to build up or tear down. It has the potential to be, lying, boastful, accusing, gossiping, slanderous, and or cursing. Or it can be a soothing ointment to a wounded spirit, helpful, encouraging, and full of blessings. But the power lies within us whether or not we are going to use it to be a tree of life or crush a spirit.
Growing up in a home of physical, emotional and mental abuse, I know all too well what harm a mother’s slanderous, mean spirited and hateful words can do to the spirit of a child. My mother’s daily communication of how I was useless and meaningless as a human being took its toll at a very young age—even more so than the beatings. I grew up to be a very wound bird until the love of Christ showed me how wrong she was. I share this because I know some of you have lived the same type of life and some of you find yourselves in the same role as my mother. The abuser! Why? Hurting people hurt others and there is healing needed in your life.
I stated in last week’s blog, anger and unforgiveness are root causes for hurtful and cutting words. And once spoken, once put into the air, we are never able to take them back. I have long forgiven my mother and I am healed of the great pain and damage her words did, but there are still times, the enemy tries to use them against me, and I am 60 years old.
As daughters of the Most High, we must continually strive to be like the Proverbs 31 woman… When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly." Proverbs 31:26 (MSG)
It is very important our speech is worthwhile—valuable and of great use and service. They need to be beneficial , rewarding, advantageous, positive, helpful, profitable, gainful, fruitful, productive, lucrative, constructive, effective, effectual, and meaningful to others. This is why it is so important we take a moment to make sure we will be building up and not tearing down before we open our mouths.
Usually our families and those closest get the words we don’t take time to taste beforehand. At work or in public we aren’t necessarily as quick to say what we are feeling at the moment. But at home it can be a different story. We yell at our children out of frustration and disrespect our husbands in our anger. How often have you said something you have regretted? We are all guilty! But it is still not an excuse to continue allowing our tongues to have rule in a way that is not pleasing to God and harmful to others.
I live on the Northeast corridor of the USA, so if I were to plant a rose bush in December with below freezing temperatures it would die. It would yield nothing because it was planted out of season—same with our words. Timing is everything! Proverbs 15:23 says, “A man has joy by the answer of his mouth, and a word spoken in due season, how good it is!” There is a time to be quiet and a time to speak and we need to know the difference, because even when what we are saying is truth and good, if out of season—nothing beneficial is produced.
There was a period when I found myself constantly in verbal arguments with my youngest daughter’s father. I was at a point in my walk with God I knew something had to change for me. I was sick of it!! The Holy Spirit led me to study the book of Proverbs. Using a paperback version of “The Living Bible” I highlighted everything concerning the tongue, speech, talking and my words with colorful markers. Not only was it eye opening, but also helped me change to the point where he could no longer bait me into arguing with him. Well, most times that is…LOL! And it made for a wonderful study guide anytime I needed to be reminded of how I am to handle my words and control my tongue. All I had to do was reread all the highlighted scriptures.
Sisters, next time you are tempted to scream at your kids, jump in your husband’s face, or argue your point to someone, take a moment to taste your words and remember Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
If you feel led to do the Proverbs study, I guarantee, you will be blessed. One chapter a day until you finish. Not only will you learn how to watch your words, but reading Proverbs will enlighten you in more ways than you can imagine! Amen!
Next week’s blog expounds on our words a little more, “Advice versus Opinions”….be blessed!!
Love & Hugs
Ponnie
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