Don't Wait to Love Yourself....Love Yourself Now!

By the time this blog is posted we will be in the month of November and well on our way to thinking about Thanksgiving, (for those in the USA), Christmas and the New Year! For many of us instead of the holidays being a joyous season it’s a time of stress loaded with low self-esteem issues.

I pray this blog will encourage you to change the way you view yourself—especially if you are one who struggles with your self-image or health.

Shortly we’ll be bombarded with ads of what we should look like for the holidays, and then before we get a break—all the major weight loss companies and products will be bombarding us with deals to join so we can lose weight and love who we are! Well, sisters, we better start loving who we are today!

Too many of us have made the same New Year’s resolution to lose weight over and over and still find ourselves in the same place, or worst—we have gained more weight. There is an old cliché attributed to Albert Einstein…“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results.” For some of us, this has become our cycle of life.

Personally I need to get back to a much healthier lifestyle. Does that entail losing weight? Yes it does. But the weight loss cannot be the main focus, making changes (no matter how small) that will become my new way of living is what is important. Loving me from the inside out is what’s most important.

In the next few months we are going to have many different voices trying to sell us gym memberships, exercise equipment, exercise and dance DVD’s, yoga and zumba fitness classes. Well, some of us may not have the money for memberships, classes or equipment. Our food budget may not include fixing meals other than that which the entire family can eat and they are not going on a diet. So, what are we to do? We are to exercise wisdom. We can start now so we don’t get caught up in the whirlwind, of spending or charging money we don’t have for something we will use or do for a month or two.

First we must start by accepting who we are today! That doesn’t mean we stop wanting to make changes for the better, but we cannot continue to put off loving ourselves until, “I lose weight or have more money to spend on me.” That is just an unacceptable mindset in the Kingdom of God!

Start today with something small that won’t cost you a dime! How about swapping out sugary drinks for more water (that includes diet drinks too)? What if you put a play list together of your favorite music and dance (at your pace) for 20 minutes a day? Cutting down portion sizes of what you eat will help, and having a cut off time at night when you stop eating. Begin to limit your sugar intake each day. Walk in the evening after dinner—there are so many little changes we can make that will start us on the road to “healthy” and “self-control”. If you are home most of the day, still put on lipstick and decent clothing—don’t wait until you have somewhere to go. Put on your best perfume just to smell good for yourself. No matter how small the start, it is a beginning and that is all that matters.

Seeking God as to what the problem is and why we are overeating or not satisfied with who we are is a very big part of the process. Is food a self-medication for you? What are the triggers in your life that cause you to eat, or feel bad about yourself? These are some of the hard questions we must ask ourselves and put before the Lord.

Getting to the root cause for sin in our lives is the best thing we can do for ourselves. Why? Because the end result is Freedom! And through Freedom comes acceptance and joy.

One of my BFF’s has lost a lot of weight the past year. In fact in August when she helped move Tovah back to college I complimented her on a new pair of black jeans she was wearing. Well, I saw her recently (almost 3 months later) and she had a belt on to keep the pants up…LOL! She has been a great inspiration to me. How? In the way her focus has been to be healthy and learning new things when it comes to what the body really needs to function and stay healthy.

My friend started posting pictures on Facebook of all these different smoothies she was starting make, and doing vegetable cleanses. She grew veggies, herbs and tomatoes in her garden this summer. But most of all she started training to run in races. And she will tell you herself, the only running she ever planned to do, was run if someone was after her...LOL! She was having trouble sleeping through the night and feeling rested during the day—that is no longer is a problem. Sleep is sweet for her, and she attributes that to eating differently and exercise.

Now, I’m not trying to convince you to run a race, but I am trying to help you see that it is not too late to make changes that will be lasting and profitable in the long term.

The beauty of being a daughter of the Most High God is everything is a custom fit for us as individuals. God will supply all our needs right where we are. You can work out with Him what it is you need to do. Memberships are good for some people because that is how some are wired, but they are not feasible for all of us. All we have to do is stop buying into what the world says we need and should have and focus more on the leading and prompting of the Holy Spirit of God to do that for us. I have two cookbooks

I would like to recommend to you, because they both talk so much about loving yourself, being healthy and yet have two very different approaches, which are both gentle.

The Perfect Recipe for Losing Weight and Eating Great, by Pam Anderson: Pam Anderson is a renowned chef who lost over fifty pounds by making certain changes in her life and has kept the weight off. I love this cookbook because her introduction talks about her journey of being overweight and her feelings…excerpt from the book “My desire to change my life began more than two years before I shed a single pound.” She talks about loving yourself right where you are and then begin to make small changes. This is not a jump in starve yourself kind of book and you will be able to cook good food for you and your family. I give it 5 stars for sure.

The Beauty Detox Foods, by Kimberly Snyder: Kimberly Snyder is one of Hollywood’s top celebrity nutritionists and beauty experts. This is another great book about health and love for oneself. This book is geared more for those who want to make big changes in the things they eat. Her focus is healthy from the inside out and how certain foods change your outward appearance for the better. Kimberly gives a lot of nutritional information that I found to be very encouraging to help me make changes that are very doable for me. And if you have an interest in cleansing and detox drinks and smoothies…this is a great book for you. Another 5 stars!

If we can start making decisions about ourselves today instead of waiting for January 1st, we will be well ahead of the game and will not fall into the same old trap we’ve might have been captive too before. Start being your best friend with a great big dose of self-love!

Until next week, Part II….be blessed!!

Love and Hugs
Ponnie

God Sees

Many of you are constantly being good to people, going out of your way to be a blessing, making sacrifices nobody knows about. Nobody may be singing your praises, nobody may be calling your name, but God sees what you’re doing. The scripture says in Matthew 6:4, “Your Father, who sees what you give in secret, will reward you in the open.” ~Joel Osteen~

When January 4, 2013 rolled in and I celebrated my 60th birthday you couldn’t tell me this was not going to be a bang up year and my season!!! Now did the Lord tell me this? No. But in my mind it stood to reason, it was time for me. Well, it hasn’t turned out as I had hoped; in fact it has been harder than the past few years have been with many sacrifices made. In many ways I felt as though I were going backwards versus moving forward. I was beginning to have thoughts that God had somehow forgotten about me—so when I read what Joel had posted on his Facebook page it was as if Lord had him do it just for me. I don’t care about folks singing my praises, but I needed to be reminded of God’s Word and what it had to say about my situation—He Sees!

Living in God’s Kingdom and imitating His MO, (Motive of operation) is not easy. In fact the world’s MO by many standards is much easier. You might go out your way a few times for someone, but then you get to say, “Ah, the heck with you!” You can stop speaking to a sib, parent or relative until Jesus comes back! You can be selfish and self-centered if you choose to. You can have a nasty attitude and tell people off, without regard to their feelings whatsoever. You are allowed to be petty, vindictive, mean and unforgiving. You can mistreat and cheat on your husband if you feel like it. If someone wrongs you, you can cut them out of your life—for good! But not in God’s Kingdom—that just won’t fly!

As Believers we have people in our lives God has put there and we can’t cut them off, (Even though the temptation is there). We are not to be selfish and self-centered. We are to be Christ centered and therefore must care for others, forgive, lend a helping hand, sacrifice our own comfort, time and money. We can’t tell someone off when they have been rude to us. We are required to put away filthy language and speak in love to others even when we feel like smashing them in the face. God’s standard for living in His Kingdom is high, and we must strive to live a life of obedience, and please Him.

At times we can begin to feel, as if we are always giving in and doing more. But do not become discouraged. If you are walking in love and the wisdom of the Lord then no one can really take advantage of you, even if it may seem they are. Yes, people may mistake your kindness as a weakness, but in truth it is one of our greatest strengths. So, therefore their misconception is on them. We may never know the outcome of the seeds we plant along the path of life in following God’s MO—but God does—because He gives the increase.

I believe if we stay focused on “Our Father, who sees what we give in secret” we will not be discouraged as often in our love walk. We won’t be so disillusioned with our husbands and or children. The way we look at our bosses will change and envy will not consume us when we are passed over for a promotion on our jobs or a certain position at church. The temptation to whine and complain will not find victory in our lives. People should see more joy in our lives, even when times are hard or difficult. It should bring us great comfort to know God not only sees all that we do to help others, how hard we work and the sacrifices we make, but that He sees when we are mistreated too. Nothing gets pass Him.

Sisters, keep the Word of God before you. It is our greatest weapon (along with prayer) to living as we should. It gives us hope, peace and a confidence, which equals—the JOY of the Lord!

Special Note: I got the job!! And they didn't even check one reference! Only God can do that...Amen!

Until next week….be blessed!!

Love and Hugs
Ponnie

From the Inside Out

While searching for a photo of a confident plus sized woman, this one took my breath away. Because immediately, I could see she feels beautiful, not because of what she has on (a simple black dress) but there is a confidence shinning from the inside out. That was me this past Saturday!

Most of us live in a society where we are bombarded daily with images of stick thin women (who mostly starve themselves to look like that) and these images often translate that if you don’t look like this you are fat or ugly. In other words we are not worthy. The sad thing is, there are way too many of us and our daughters who are buying into this foolishness and we must begin to view ourselves as God does. We must work on loving and embracing ourselves from the inside out.

This past Saturday, I went to a job fair at a retail chain. Leading up to that, my self-esteem had been pretty low, I was battling depression and feelings of hopelessness along with being too old and fat. Key words “was battling”! Because by Saturday morning, I had the victory!!

Of course our enemy gave it one last shot. When the alarm sounded at 6am I woke up to a throbbing sinus headache. That was not good! I lay in bed and prayed and fell back asleep until 7am. I felt better, but still not 100%, so I spent another 15 minutes talking to God about how great He was and thanking him for my impending interview. By 7:15am I was good to go and got up.

I didn’t get to piddle or really enjoy my coffee as I had hoped, (halfway through it was cold) because I had to fill out the application, which by the way I had had for over 2 weeks. Yes, I had skimmed over it and thought to myself, “No problem I'll fill in the information from my résumé.” Hum, it took longer than anticipated. Note to self—don’t ever do that again! Nonetheless I was determined to not be flustered by my own doing, so I forged on.

There was an almost overwhelming confidence radiating from inside that wasn’t there the day before. I realized I was no longer concerned about my age or that the black dress slacks I was wearing were about 7 years old and my brocade blazer was even older. These were things I had struggled not to think about all day Friday. I just keep addressing each issue with what the Word of God had to say about me. And I kept my focus on what God’s favor means and the power it has. And low and behold girls, this was the confidence that was whelming up inside me.

Instead of driving my daughter’s car, I opted to walk and enjoy the beauty of the fall flowers and the changing colors of the leaves. The closer I got to the store the more confident I became. I wasn't concerned if I had to stand in line for hours; I was prepared, able, willing and ready! All in the power of being confident in who I was—a daughter of the Most High God!

I arrived five minutes after it started and got to speak with someone right away. I was hoping to snag one of the seasonal part-time jobs they were offering, but they felt I would be suited to work in the pharmacy as a pharmacy technician. The interviewer felt as though I would be a good fit helping the elderly and sick clientele. God reminded me, He is capable of doing—much more than I had hoped for.

The job is not mine yet, but I made it through the first step, came home and took an online test for them and will have my second interview prayerfully sometime next week.

Sisters (especially my more mature sisters) don’t buy into what the world says is beautiful; embrace with every ounce of your being, what God says is beautiful to Him. When our confidence is in the Lord, we cannot lose! If you are in need of paid work, don’t let the world tell you that you are too old, not attractive enough, or you are lacking because you don’t have a college degree. Don’t listen to the lies—don’t allow the latest fashion trends to dictate how you are going to feel about yourself! It doesn’t matter if you are just getting out of school, are overweight or haven’t worked in years; it is nothing God can’t handle.

How we really feel about ourselves becomes obvious on the outside no matter who you are. I know physically beautiful women who have low self-esteem, and that just goes to show it is not so much about what we look like as much as it is what we think and believe about ourselves. Once we can begin to love who we are from the inside then it will manifest itself on the outside. There will be a great aurora of confidence that people will see and feel. Yes, the confidence of others does rub off on you just as their negativity can.

You are worthy because God says you are, not because of anything you have done. We are privileged because Jesus died so we would be. We just need to work on living the royal life we are entitled to from the inside out!

1Peter 3:3-4 (NIV) "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight."

Until next week….be blessed!!

Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Favor Makes the Impossible Happen

For the past couple of weeks, I’ve had to fiercely battle depression, despair, hopelessness, low self-esteem, a lack of confidence and the feelings of being useless. Is any of this true if we are a child of God? Absolutely not! But it doesn’t mean that emotionally we cannot be overtaken  by our feelings if we give into the temptation to do so. I have lived long enough and walked long enough with the Lord to know it was not an option for me to give in, so that meant I had to fight. And truthfully, it has not been an easy battle—it went on for a few days.

I grew up in a household of physical and emotional abuse. From as far back as I can remember, I was told I was “nothing” and would never amount to “anything”. I was raised to believe I was useless and one of the biggest mistakes God every made. As a young woman I made poor choices based on looking for love in all the wrong places. For many years I was a people pleaser, trying to be accepted and appreciated. But nothing I did ever worked out for any length of time. There were many years as a young girl; I would lie in my bed thinking of ways to either kill my mother or myself. As a woman, suicidal thoughts often pledged me when life seemed too hard or I experienced another devastating disappointment. But the good news is…Jesus changed all of that!

After Jesus became Lord and Master of my life, I have never, ever, had another suicidal thought in my life. I no longer had to deal with that particular aspect of depression again. Does that make me more special than anyone else? Of course not! God seems to fix certain things immediately for all of us once we enter into His Kingdom. He knows what we need individually to be set free of so we can move on and grow. I remember being asked in women’s Bible study to name something God healed me of or did for me without me asking. I remember answering, “He healed my night blindness and my bad feet!” At the time I was a babe and had yet to realize the spirit of “suicide” no longer had rule over me.

My night blindness hindered me from going to Bible Study once time changed and it was dark driving home. God healed me on the night I had to drive in sleet and ice to the hospital to say good-bye to my mother—she had passed and was going to be cremated. I prayed so hard all the way, because I could barely see in front of me. But halfway there all that changed and I could see everything! That was over 23 years ago and I am still healed. I had an operation on both my feet when I was 22 years old, but the end result was not what I had hoped for, and often I was in pain. One day my feet stopped hurting and that was the end of that! As for the spirit of suicide leaving—when I look back, I believe it happened the same moment the Holy Spirit moved in.

Now as for the many other things in my life I needed to be healed of and delivered from, it has been a work in progress and still is. It was not until my fifties I truly forgave my mother. It has taken many years for me to agree with God that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and my self-esteem lies in Him—and not in how I look, what I wear or what others think of me. As the old Virginia Slims cigarette commercial used to say, “You’ve come a long way baby!” So, I was more than a little surprised when it seemed the flood gates of hell opened up and, depression, despair, hopelessness, low self-esteem, a lack of confidence and the feelings of being useless showed up all together and bringing a few friends to boot!

Praying was hard, so I ran to my sisters-in-Christ because I knew I didn’t have to pretend to be strong, when I was feeling so sad. We talked, I cried and we talked some more, until I was encouraged to remember who I belong to and what that means. (See August 16th blog, “Collective Wisdom”)

At the age of 60 and looking for temporary work, is not as easy as it used to be. For one, I’m of the generation where you had an opportunity to present yourself in person. Now it is look on line. The more I tried adapting to the world’s new way of doing things, the less confident and hopeful I felt. Why was that? I had become distracted and was forgetting that all I need is—God’s Favor!!!

There is a place of business I had hoped to find seasonal work at for the past 2 weeks, (they were only hiring for managers) but Saturday they are holding walk-in interviews. I will be there bright and early looking for God’s “Favor”! Does this guarantee I will be hired? Nope, because this may not be where God wants me, (I do have other irons in the fire) but I will still go remembering who my Father is, and what He is capable of doing.

Sisters, if things are looking hopeless, just remember God’s favor can open doors and make things happen when there seems to be no way!

Proverbs 3: 3-4 (NIV) 3 Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. 4 Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man.

Until next week….be blessed!!

Love & Hugs
Ponnie

We Need an Unshakable Confidence

The weekly blogs are usually written a couple of weeks in advance, but for those of us living in the United States, which is entering its 11th day of a government shutdown, I wanted to write something current to encourage us through these parlous times. Monday a dear friend sent me an email to encourage me, which I didn’t get to read until this morning (Thursday)…what a blessing and great reminder of what we need to do.

“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.” (Hebrews 10:35, NIV)

Unshakable Confidence…When God places a promise in your heart; you have to come to the place where you believe it’s going to happen so strongly that nothing can talk you out of it. It may seem impossible. All the circumstances may tell you that it’s not going to happen, but deep down you have to have this confidence, this knowing, that God is still on the throne. He is bigger than any obstacle. He already has a way, and at the exact time, what He promised will come to pass. You have this unshakeable confidence. You know that God is fighting your battles, arranging things in your favor, making a way even when you don’t see a way.

Instead of being discouraged, you get up in the morning thanking God that the answer is on the way. Instead of talking about how big the problem is, you go through the day talking about how big your God is. Your mind is set in one direction: victory, favor, healing, and restoration. It may be taking a long time, but God didn’t bring you this far to leave you. You’ve seen Him do it in the past, and you know He will do it again in the future. You are fully persuaded because when you know your God, you have unshakeable confidence! by Joel & Victoria Osteen

Sisters I know some of you are going through some very trying times at the moment, and you are not alone—I also find myself in a place of having no income. I’ve been here once before, a little over 21 years ago. Is it scary? Yes, to say the least. And it has been a great struggle to stay in the present praising God for what I have and how all my needs are being met today. My heart and soul want to look at tomorrow, (as if there is anything we can do about tomorrow) through eyes of hopelessness. I live with my oldest daughter and her children. You might think, well, you’re okay—but not really. I am a burden to her, and that doesn’t make me feel good at all. And my youngest daughter is a college junior.

Looking into tomorrow or next week or the week after looks dim and frightening based on current, trials, tribulations or tests we may be experiencing. Because we find ourselves having to contend with questions such as: How will I make it? What if I lose everything? Supposed I’m not healed and my medical coverage runs out? This is why; looking ahead based on today’s circumstances is not good for us, nor does Jesus recommend it. Reason being, we do not have a clue as to what tomorrow will bring and today has enough in it to deal with. Truth is all we need is one word from God, to change everything around. That could be our government getting their act together so that people are called back to work, or those working without pay will see a check for their efforts. All veterans and those on disabilities and social security will receive their monies on time, and all unemployment benefits received as expected. The next doctor’s report says, your cancer is gone! For me and all the others looking for work, it could mean that phone call, “Your Hired!” or it could be that we must continue to wait a little longer. But the more we strive to live in “today” and not worry about tomorrow, the better off we are.

I have seen hard times before, so this is nothing new, but at 60, the world and others say, “You’re too old and useless for work.” But Jesus says, “Have faith in God!” Who do I choose to believe? Jesus!! God has made a promise to me and He has also told me something about my upcoming season in life and it looks nothing like what I see today. So, what does that mean? It means? “Instead of being discouraged, "I’m going to get up in the morning thanking God—the answer is on the way. Instead of talking about how big my problem is, I’ll go through the day talking about how big my God is. I am setting my mind in one direction: victory, favor, healing, and restoration” Amen!!

Be encouraged my dear sisters that God is near and hears your cries. You may be facing losing your house or eviction from your apartment. In a few days your utilities might be cut off or you are having a hard time feeding your family. It may seem that your healing is never coming, or your marriage is never going to be mended. You look around and see others seeming to prosper when you are going backwards and it hurts and causes you to question God’s love for you. Well, don’t give into those feelings—rebuke them with every being that you have! Do not roll up in a ball of despair, instead get up and praise God! Listen to the godly wisdom of Joel and Victoria. Read your Bibles and hold on for dear life! Amen!

Today I did a little something different with the song of the week, because I want you to get up and dance….enjoy!!!

Until next week….be blessed!!

Love & Hugs
Ponnie