Wait! I Only Have Two Hands.

Anyone who is a parent whether single or married can relate to the struggles of balancing all of life’s needs. As a single parent of three, I struggle everyday to balance my children’s needs and my needs. Imagine a mountain with little ole’ me at the bottom being overtaken by an avalanche of needs. This is my life every day. My 11 year Zoe is very self sufficient but still needs attention, help with her homework or just wants to talk. The latter usually occurs right as I walk through the door before I’ve had a chance to decompress. If she does not get that attention she acts out in ways that is not only bad for her but further tests both my limits and my sanity. My soon to be 5 year old Christina is growing more and more independent every day. She doesn’t want my help getting dressed; “I can do it” is a phrase I hear quite often. She has a younger sister to play with so that takes up a lot of her time. But Tina often just wants to sit with me or just wants a hug and a kiss. Did I mention that she usually wants this while I’m sitting in the tub? I’m convinced that she only does this to soften me up so that I will give her access to my bubbles. Then there is my 2 ½ year old Amaia-Joi (AJ), what can I say about her. If she did not have her father’s features I would swear that she was switched at birth. There is not enough cheese in all of Wisconsin to go with all of the whine that I am subjected to on a daily basis. She whines and cries about everything. She is a very needy child and is still at the age where she wants to constantly be under me. I’m still working on potty training also which is very frustrating considering that my other two were both potty trained by the age of 2.

Notice I did not discuss my needs; that is usually because they don’t get addressed. I shop for myself maybe twice a year. It’s been about 6 months since I’ve gotten my hair done and I usually treat myself to a movie or a day out about once every 2 months. The biggest need in my life that doesn’t get addressed as they should, are my spiritual needs. I know that my prayer life and the time I spend with God are nowhere near where they should be. God instructs us that, “For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened” (Matthew 7:8 NKJV). Many days I find that I am too tired to knock on His door. Many days I find I do a lousy job at balancing the kids, work, and school and tending to my spiritual needs. This became magnified after I had my 3rd child. I don’t mean to sound down on myself and my abilities to juggle life’s duties; there is a bright spot in all of this. I have learned the importance of having a personal relationship with Christ. I would box Him into an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening but I have learned the importance of incorporating Him into all aspects of my life.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 instructs us to pray without ceasing. Now I know we can’t pray all day long but for me this scripture means every moment that we have we should be in constant communication with Him. So I will talk to Him in my car on the way to work, during quiet times throughout the day. This keeps me in constant contact with him. When I don’t do this I feel distant and disconnected and this leaves me ill prepared to handle life’s challenges and everyone’s needs. I know that this is only one season in my life and that my children will grow older and require less of me (I’ve already prepared in my mind the blog that I will write 8 years from now about how I am no longer needed). However I will use this season to continue to learn how to include God in my entire life and not box Him into spare moments. When I limit Him I limit myself and that is something I don’t want to do. I would rather experience the abundant life He has for me and I won’t find it in one hour in the morning or at night.




Peace & Love
Michele

I'll be back to share with you on, Wednesday, January 27th.

Thursday's Blog: We have a new member joining "The Kitchen Table" and her bio will be tomorrow's post...please stop by to meet this super sister!

Meet the "Wampler Zoo"

I am so excited to be given this great opportunity to talk about my family, and as you get to know me better you will see that this and my Lord and Savior are the two topics that I love to tell others about the most. SO, if you are ready, sit back, grab a hot cup of tea and join me as we take a walk through the Wampler Zoo.

As I am writing to you, I am sitting in my office surrounded by crayons, coloring books, papers of all kinds and none of it is mine. My children love to sit in the office with me and color while I’m working and today has been a significant day of coloring and crafts so the room is far worse than it was yesterday. BUT what does a mother do? I enjoy the company and this evening before bed they will all come in here and straighten it up.

Over the years, I found that being the mother of eleven children is not always easy but is most defiantly rewarding. Looking back over the years and the struggles, I can say with every assurance that if I had to go back and do it over, I would not change one thing! If I did we might not have been blessed as much as we have been.

Nineteen years ago my beloved husband and I stood before our minister and took our vows of marriage, through sickness and in health, in good times and bad, I don’t however, remember him saying “Through a home full of children!” In fact, we had only been married a few months when he decided to inform me he did not want children at all. It was like a slap in the face! I had always wanted children and a full house of them, yet here I had married this man that did not want any. I felt trapped and I was not the least bit happy to say.

BUT as always God sent His miracle to me, I became very ill, took a pregnancy test; it said I was pregnant but according to God’s will I miscarried. With heart broken, I went to see the doctor. He ran several tests on both of us and we were informed that the odds were stacked against us. It would be impossible for us to have a child of our own without a fertility specialist, a lot of money and even then there were no promises. When we came home from the doctor’s; I was beyond upset with God, life and everything else. How could this happen to me, (the one person that adored children and would be the best mom in the world)?

I dropped out of church. I refused to go to church, and I didn’t want to worship a God that took my dream away from me. I didn’t want to talk to him or to think about him in anyway. I was brokenhearted. Then God sent an angel to us, in the form of a good friend that understood how I felt as she was in the same situation. She called and asked me if I would care for her foster baby during the day while she went to work. After talking to Rich we agreed the extra money would be good and I could use the company during the day.

We began the first part of God’s miracle to us, we found that foster children were so easy to love and easy to enjoy. As time went on we began to discuss becoming foster parents, I knew in my heart that I could not adopt a child, I did not have that kind of love in my heart for someone else’s child, I could care for them and love them but not “LOVE THEM AS MY OWN”. We called Family and Children’s Services and got the paperwork to begin the newest journey in our married life. We became foster parents. We had not completely finished our training when we were given our first baby, a 3 month old biracial baby girl who was born addicted to drugs. One thing I was not prepared for was a drug baby that cried continually and never slept. I remember one night during a particularly painful time for the baby; I looked toward heaven and cried, “LORD WHAT HAVE I GOTTEN MYSELF INTO?” I swaddled the baby tightly and we sat in the rocking chair and she slept while I cried.

The next week, we were able to return this sweet baby girl to her family. I remember sitting on the front steps and crying my eyes out when the social worker came to get her. The sleepless nights and the frustration were gone; but I missed having a baby in my arms. I remember asking the Lord to fill our home soon, because the silence was too much for me.

It was 3 weeks later when the call came to pickup two small young boys. Their mom was a little overwhelmed and was putting them in foster care for a few weeks so she could get her life back in order. This was going to be a snap. HA! God never does things in our time, those few weeks turned into four and a half years. We were also given their baby brother. By this time, I was a little overwhelmed but I loved it! Then we got the call, a 6 month old baby boy, mom was incarcerated and dad was not a good person to care for him. Of course we said, “Yes” very loudly and thought; “Okay the house is now full we have four children all under the age of 5.”

Our first baby leaving did not prepare us adequately for returning our second one. Our six month old baby boy was now two and a half years old when we were ordered by the court to return him to his birth mother. My heart was broken. We had signed intent to adopt forms on this baby, we were supposed to adopt him, but God was not following the plan at all. The heartbreak became so deep that I did not want to keep fostering, my husband and I discussed it and I called the office to let them know we were not going to continue to foster anymore. My heart could not take the pain of letting go. BUT as always God had a plan that He did not discuss with me first.

So sorry ladies but I have to run, and I don’t mean to leave you hanging, but you will have to tune in Tuesday, January 26th for the rest of this story. ~Smile~


Much Love
Rise’

Wednesday’s Blog: Michele Cousins, “Single Working Mom”

Starting the New Year with Financial Fitness in Mind

Anybody have debt? Maybe those who don’t have debt would be a shorter list. But we can do our part and join the ranks of those who are spending less than they make. I know, it sounds like such a foreign concept. But it is a much-needed one if we are to achieve Financial Peace.

Let’s start here...............

Step 1: Commitment
Develop a written commitment. It can be as simple as responding to this BLOG with your name and email address and a sentence that says: “I commit to the process of becoming debt-free and changing my financial habits.” Or it can be as elaborate as a written contract that expresses your discontent with your current situation, the exact facets of your financial situation that you would like to change, along with a pledge to take the necessary steps to reach your goals.

Step 2: Stop spending
Stop spending money on things that are not considered essential expenses. Pay the basics such as food, shelter, and transportation and other bills that need to be paid.

Step 3: Analyze
Practically assess your current financial situation by answering the following questions:

1. What is your current income?
2. What are your expenses?
3. What do you own?
4. What do you owe?

Step 4: Track
Where does all the money go? Each day when you spend money, write down two pieces of information, what for and how much. You can do this using a 3x5 card every day or carrying a journal where you write everything. And if you are married, both of you need to track your spending so that you will have an accurate record of where all of your money goes, every
dime . . .Track your spending for a month.

Step 5: Stop Using Credit
You cannot get yourself out of a hole by digging further down. That is what happens when you continue to make purchases using debt. In order to build wealth, you must first spend less than you make. Imagine how much disposable income you would have if you were not sending payments out for credit cards, or cars, or even your home.
Let’s start this year off right!




Peace & Prosperity
Sharon



For your next steps tune in on Monday, January 25th



Tuesday’s Blog: Rise’ Wampler….”The Wampler Zoo”



Comenzar el Año Nuevo con una Buena Forma Financiera en la Mente

¿Alguien tiene deuda? Tal vez aquellos que no tienen deuda serían una lista más corta. Pero podemos hacer nuestra parte y unirnos a las filas de aquellos que están gastando menos de lo que hacen. Lo sé, suena como un concepto extraño. Pero es muy necesario si queremos lograr la Paz Financiera.

Comenzamos aquí.......

Paso 1: Compromiso
Desarrolle un compromiso escrito. Puede ser tan simple como responder a este BLOG con su nombre y dirección de correo electrónico y una oración que dice: “Me comprometo al proceso de hacerme libre de deudas y cambiar mis hábitos financieros.” O puede ser tan complicado como un contrato escrito que expresa su descontento con su situación actual, las facetas exactas de su situación financiera que le gustaría cambiar, junto con una promesa para tomar las medidas necesarias para alcanzar sus metas.

Paso 2: Dejar de gastar
Deje de gastar el dinero para cosas que no son considerados gastos esenciales. Pague los fundamentos como alimento, refugio, y transporte y otras cuentas que tienen que ser pagadas.

Paso 3: Analizar
Prácticamente evaluar su situación financiera actual contestando las preguntas siguientes:

1. ¿Cuáles son sus ingresos actuales?

2. ¿Cuáles son sus gastos?

3. ¿Qué posee usted?

4. ¿Qué son sus deudas?

Paso 4: Mantén un rastro
¿Adonde se va todo el dinero? Cada día cuando usted gasta el dinero, anota dos informaciones, para que lo esta utilizando y cuanto. Usted puede hacer esto utilizando una tarjeta 3x5 cada día o cargar un diario donde usted escribe todo. Y si usted está casado, ustedes dos tienen que rastrear sus gastos para que ustedes tengan un registro exacto donde todo su dinero va, cada moneda... Rastrea sus gastos durante el mes.

Paso 5: Deje de Usar Crédito
Usted no puede salirse de un hoyo cavando mas abajo. Eso es lo que pasa cuando usted sigue haciendo compras usando crédito. A fin de construir la riqueza, usted debe gastar menos de lo que usted hace. Imagínese cuanto ingresos disponible tendría si no tuviera que mandar pagos al las tarjetas de crédito, pagos de carro y aun su casa.

¡Empecemos este año bien!


Paz y Prosperidad,
Sharon



Mi blog siguiente: Para los próximos pasos chequea el Lunes, 25 de enero

Blog del martes: Rise 'Wampler .... "El Zoológico Wampler"

Procrastinators Unite…….Tomorrow

pro•cras•ti•nate: To put off doing something, especially out of habitual carelessness or laziness. To postpone or delay needlessly

Let’s face it, we all procrastinate. Whether it’s that big English paper due at the end of the week, or that presentation your boss wants by Monday. We’ve all gone through the process of putting a task off until later, especially if that task is unappealing to us. Being a teenager I deal with procrastination on a daily basis. I’ve often found myself in trouble for waiting until the last minute to do a chore, or not finishing a paper until the night before it’s due. Procrastination is something that everyone struggles with, not just teenagers, and it can be difficult to overcome.

I like to think of procrastination as a form of the “empty self.” The “empty self” is when we only focus on things that make us happy, and not on the world around us. It’s like thinking “I’m not gonna do that thing right now because it makes me happier to do it later,” or “Why should I do that now when I can do it in 2 hours? Is it that much of a difference?” (I’m guilty of thinking this way sometimes) This thought process becomes a never ending cycle of things getting done late or not getting done at all.

I actually find myself procrastinating right now as I am writing this blog. Rather than typing I was playing solitaire and checking on Facebook. Procrastination is like a thief, in that it always steals something away from us. My mom has a saying, “Procrastination will always rob you blind.” When we put something off until tomorrow, we are taking a huge risk because tomorrow brings its own set of problems and other things that need to be done. The next day is not guaranteed to any of us, and procrastination in itself is a big gamble.

A synonym for procrastination is laziness. What prevents us from doing things at a certain time? It is often because we are too lazy or comfortable to extend ourselves out of our comfort zone and get up off our butts and do it! Proverbs 10:4 says “Lazy hands make a man poor, but diligent hands bring wealth.” Procrastination and laziness will rob us of the wealth that God wants to supply us with, and will also deem us as irresponsible in His eyes. I don’t think that any of us wants God to think that we are irresponsible and cannot be trusted with the blessings that He has planned for us.

The thing is we can’t conquer procrastination by ourselves. But we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. Isaiah 41: 10 says “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” God knows the flaws that we all have to overcome, and He is there to help us every step of the way. I hope that this has encouraged you to begin to fight to overcome the spirit of procrastination, and any other bad habits that you may need to take care of to make 2010 a better and productive year for you. I’m working on it!


Peace Out!
Tovah


My next blog: Saturday, January 23rd, check you out then!

Tune in next Saturday, for Lyida..."Life of an 18 year old"

Monday's blog: Sharon Dainels..."Women & Their Finances"

Are you Annoying Sometimes?…I’m Just Asking

Many people who know me know I like to laugh so sometimes I will pickup autobiographies of comedians who have written about their lives. I like to understand where they came from and what made them want to make people laugh for a living. Well recently I came across a website that had famous quotes by some comedians. Here is one I like to share to see if you see not only the humor but also the truth that lies within the words.

“I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” This was said by the comedian Rita Rudner. After reading this and laughing, I began to think that being married to someone can sometimes cause you to be annoyed by the littlest things that they do. For instance, when my husband leaves his breakfast dishes on the counter, instead of placing them in the sink, I get a little annoyed. In my mind I’m thinking, “Hellooo, the sink isn’t that far!! Really!? Do I have maid tattooed on my forehead?” Oh, here’s another one, when he leaves his shoes at the bottom of the stairs and I trip over them. Again, I’m thinking, “When I bust my head on the wall and end up in the hospital you’ll be happy then won’t you?” Yes, that’s a bit extreme, but nonetheless after that happens I have an attitude and I am annoyed, because I think he is being inconsiderate. Some of you may be thinking I should give him a good talking to. Others are thinking I’m right in my thinking and he should clean up after himself. That would be the considerate thing to do. But before we go riding off into the lovely sunset of self-righteousness, we should think about this from God’s perspective as viewed through, I Corinthian 13: 4-7.

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.

If love is patient then that bowl and spoon left on the counter aren’t that important are they? Well, if I had to be honest, and I will be honest here, on a bad day……it is. But if I look through the eyes of love, according to God’s word, it really isn’t. God is asking us to be patient and not to be proud. If WE are so annoyed at the little things that our spouses do don’t you think they are just as annoyed sometimes at the things WE do? It’s a hard picture to look upon when we turn that mirror to our own reflection isn’t it.

Here’s a truth we may want to think about. Only you are responsible for your reaction to a situation no matter how small. When we become aggravated over the littlest thing and then respond in a negative way to that irritation we are headed for the road of bitterness, without even knowing it. It’s the little foxes that ruin the vineyards (Song of Solomon 2:15). Your attitude will affect your actions, your thoughts, and your words. You are not going to be able to control what your spouse does or does not do but you can be a gentle influence on your spouse. For instance, if I don’t want my husband to leave shoes in the floor I could say, “Honey wow, I really like these shoes and I know you do too, so I’m going to put them over here so no one steps on them.” The next time he thinks to leave his shoes he may just pick them up and place them where no one can trip over them. But if my attitude is negative and mean when I approach him my influence is lost.

We can all understand being annoyed but we should be careful what we say and do when we are irritated. It is so easy to have that knee jerk reaction and just say the first thing that comes to our minds. However, what would happen if we took a minute and responded in the spirit and not in the flesh.

God’s desire is that we treat each other well and with consideration no matter what the situation. He’s not nearly as concerned about why we respond the way we do, as he is about how we respond. In the words of Proverbs 15:1, “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.”


Love & blessings,
Rita

Tune in Friday, January 22nd for my next blog.

Saturday's blog: Tovah...Life a High School Junior