3 Plus 6.....Is What?!

Hi Everyone,

Welcome to my kitchen table! I am so glad you decided to join me. I will be writing you twice a month to share with you my experience as a new home school mom. Hopefully through our time together I will encourage those of you who are in the throes of homeschooling and those who are considering it. As I allow you into my heart and my head (maybe not the best place to be), we will laugh, probably cry a little but most assuredly ponder our decision for alternative education. But before I start to divulge the ups, downs and sideways of being a “mommy teacher” I want to give some background on why the decision was made to home school.

Eleven years ago when Brian (the husband) and I married we decided that when children came along that I would no longer work outside the home. So almost 8 years ago Brandon was born and I became a full time stay at home mom. 4 years later Christian was born. I was glad to be home with my boys (not all the time). And even though I believe that raising my kids was my second ministry, my marriage being first, I looked forward to them going to school. ‘’Why?” You may ask. Well for several reasons, one being to have some peace and quiet, for those of you raising boys you know what I mean. The other reason for sending them to school was more image than anything. I like the thought of being the mom who took her kids to school, picked them up, volunteered at the school, made cookies, joined the PTA and went on the trips. Well, how many of you know that when your children are surrounded by influences that go against what you believe and they are not getting challenged academically, holding onto an image gets old and tired real quick?

Now before I continue let me back up and tell you that Brian was in favor of homeschooling when Brandon was 2. He had been subtly sharing information about teaching your kids at home. He had done research comparing the effects of home schooling as opposed to public or private schooling (he is a scientist, what can I say?) My response to him was “Oh really honey, that’s interesting.” NOT!! It was more like “Yeah right, whateva!”

So Brandon turned 5 and off to kindergarten he went. It was a good first year experience. It was a school dedicated to nothing but kindergarteners. He had a wonderful time. And yes I did volunteer, make cookies, and go on trips. Then 1st grade came and to tell you the truth I was not feeling it. It would take too long to tell you all the things I did not like but I will say he did have a pretty good teacher. What do we do we asked ourselves. I asked myself, Brian already had the answer. With one income private school was not an option. I thought to myself I should pray about this. What a novel idea to go to the One who has all Wisdom! Guess what the outcome was? You are right! Ding, ding, ding! Tell them what they’ve won! By the time you read this I will be four months into this thing with no regrets. Is this challenging? Definitely. Do I have peace and quiet? NO! But as I mentioned before I have no regrets.


Hugs and Kisses,
Cheryl

Cheryl's Next Blog: Thursday, January 21st...see you then!

Friday's Blog: Rita Scarborough, "Married People"

Wedding Anyone?

There is something in the Body of Christ that makes me sad, and that is how God’s single daughters are missing out on the good life, because they are so pressed to be a Sadie, “Married Lady.” When I say the “good life” I’m talking about the goodness that Jesus says He came to give us in John 10:10

Why is it that women (young and old) want to be married so badly? Over the years I have posed this question to so many single women I have actually lost count, and the reasons are varied, but there is a common thread for most. That common thread is that women are just in love with the “idea” of marriage. I say this because when I ask the question, “What is God’s perspective on women and marriage?” most don’t have a clue. The world’s view of love, happiness and marriage is all tangled up in fantasy lust, nonsense and pure sin. It looks nothing and I mean nothing like the reality of a union between a man and woman according to the Lord. For one, He doesn’t give you the luxury of “Falling in and out of Love with your spouse.” So you don’t stay married until the thrill is gone and have permission to find another thrill. His Good Book has nothing in it about, “I don’t love you anymore!” so that means its over. He says, love is an action word and you can’t pick and choose to love when you feel like it. He says you have to love your spouse even when he doesn’t help around the house, bathe the kids, be romantic, or pick up his dirty underwear. When you were courting and were just so in love and everything he did was perfect, no one could tell you his love of sports would make you feel neglected. But now you hate him and March Madness. Once the gown is clean and put away as a keepsake, and the honeymoon is over, all that is left is the every day reality of living through the commitment you made to God and him. If your union is not one that was made in heaven, it could surely turnout to be more like something that came from hell.

I wonder how many cumulative hours are wasted each day as God’s girls cry out to Him, “How long Lord, how long?” That is “How long do I have to wait to be married?” “How long before I find a husband”? “How long before I have kids?” “How LONG?!!” “God, are you there??”

Women are drawn to talk to me because of the anointing the Holy Spirit has given me in my ministry, and in a natural, comfortable and intimate setting women will often share with one another. And it is a rarity to meet a single woman who is satisfied with being single. A single woman who knows she has been called to be single for however long a season and is living life and having a ball. This should not be the rarity but the norm. Yet, God’s daughters are just hanging on until that husband, and missing opportunity after opportunity. Sisters, I pray that before 2010 is over that I have encouraged those of you who are not having the time of your life, to rethink, reassess and begin to reclaim what’s been slipping by you.

For starters, I want to clear up a common misconception among my single sisters, “You do not find a husband! He finds you!” Proverbs 18:22 says, A man who finds a wife, finds a good thing, and has favor from the Lord. Ooh, did you gals get that? I sure hope so. Also, Proverbs 19:14 tell us that “A prudent wife is a gift from God.” Wait a minute! It looks like these two scriptures are telling us that becoming someone’s wife is between God and the man. Yep, that is exactly what they are saying, so on that premise I’m going to encourage those of you who are begging God for a husband (or to be married) to stop it. Why? Because if you believe what the Bible says, then you will realize that begging God does not move Him, and if He is in charge of this marriage business, then why concern yourself with it? I’m saying this because I want my single sisters to be FREE!! It is something that too many of us are not, and it is a shame; and at times a “sin”. Yes, I said it, “Sin.” Whenever we are not content with our lives according to God’s will, we are in sin. When we have a loss of joy because we don’t have something we want, (not something that we need) we are telling God, that He doesn’t know what He is doing. But the reason so many women are discontented by not being married, is because in truth they don’t really believe God is in control. I know that seems harsh, but it is very true. And in order to live the good life, we must live it in truth.

I know that trusting in God is easier said than done. Walking in Faith and by Faith, from Faith to Faith, (no matter how you slice it) takes faith and determination. And according to Paul, there is also a fight involved. So, I don’t disregard those things that are stumbling blocks for God’s single daughters, and over the next few months that is what we will be talking about, those stumbling blocks that cause us to rush ahead of God, be upset with Him and just generally miss out on so much He has for us.

If you are a woman who has been secretly pressuring God or even becoming impatient with God about getting married, then I would like you to spend the next two weeks meditating on Proverbs 18:22 and 19:14. Delve into them and pray about what they really mean versus what is in your heart. As you begin to get understanding it will help you to see that God has a plan and just maybe you haven’t gotten onboard with Him and His desires for you. In the next few months we will take a look at what it means to be lonely, looking for a better lifestyle, wanting children, feeling incomplete, wanting a license to have legal sex, being somebody, how come God doesn’t love me enough to give me a husband, and many other issues that blind and hinder single women from living their lives to the fullest every day.

I have one more thing to say before I go, and that is every woman is going to be single at some point in her life, and that is a good thing because there is purpose in your singleness. The world says life is not good unless you are hooked up with someone. But then again what would we expect; from a world that always goes against that which God has deemed to be good. Just as God setup marriage between a man and a woman, He has also setup and put into place the position of being single. Whether it is for a season or for all your days on this earth, God has deemed it good.

Take my challenge single Daughters of the Most High, and make the decision that your life as a single woman is wonderful and fulfilling God’s plan and purpose for your life.

See you in 2 weeks.

Love & Hugs
Ponnie

My next blog: Wednesday, January 20th.

Thursday's blog: Cheryl Mackey, "Diary of a Homeschooling Mom"

Face your fear going into the New Year!"

Happy New Year and Welcome to “The Kitchen Table”!

I was talking to my kids about this first blog and asking them what I should write. Isaiah, my older son, said I should write about what the New Year means to me.

Well here it is…The New Year means to me is facing my fears to get out of my comfort zone. In my heart, there are so many things that I would like to do, but the fear of getting out of what is so comfortable is what keeps me from doing it. I was always willing and able to learn and try new things, but my mind would bring up the fear of the unknowns and I would hide behind those fears (just like the picture above). For example, the first thought that came to mind was “What are people going to think?”

The Bible says “For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7, for me it was easier to read this than actually applying it and practicing it in my life.

I decided this year I am going to face my fears and get out of my comfort zone with the peace that God provides and do the things that I always wanted to do and not let the fear of the unknown get the best of me. The Bible says “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” John 14:27. I thank God for the peace HE leaves with us! This means that I can do anything that I set my mind to do; I just have to trust in HIM and only HIM!

I will always proclaim that I’m more than a conqueror (Romans 8:37)! I have Jesus as my Lord and Savior, whom or what shall I fear? Nobody and Nothing!!

Another way that I’m showing you that I’m facing fears and getting out of my comfort zone is by writing to all of you in a transparent level of my life’s journey unscripted.

My prayer is that all of you who read these blogs will be inspired and encouraged to know that you are not alone on this journey. We all go through things in life and together we can press on toward the goal (Philippians 3:14) and fulfill the purpose God has for our lives.



God Bless You Always,
Maria Guzman

My next blog will be on Tuesday, January 19th, hope to see you then!

Wednesday's Blog: Ponnie Cousins "Single & Loving It"




¡Feliz Año Nuevo y Bienvenida a "La mesa de la Cocina"!



Yo estaba hablando con mis hijos acerca de este primer blog y pedirles que lo que debiera escribir. Isaías, mi hijo mayor, me dijo que debería escribir sobre lo que el Año
Nuevo significa para mí.

Bien, aquí es ... El Año Nuevo significa para mí enfrentar a mis miedos y salir de mi zona de comodidad. En mi corazón, hay tantas cosas que me gustaría hacer, pero el temor de salir de lo que es tan cómodo es lo que me impide hacerlo. Siempre estaba dispuesta y capaz de aprender y probar cosas nuevas, pero mi mente llevaría hasta el miedo a lo desconocido y yo me escondía detrás de esos miedos (como la foto de arriba). Por ejemplo, el primer pensamiento que vino a la mente fue "¿Qué van a pensar de mi?"
La Biblia dice: "Porque no nos ha dado Dios espíritu de cobardía, sino de poder, de amor y de dominio propio.” 2 Timoteo 1:7, para mí era más fácil de leer esto que en realidad aplicar y practicar en mi vida.

Este año he decidido que voy a enfrentar mis temores y salir de mi zona de comodidad con la paz que Dios ofrece y hacer las cosas que siempre quise hacer y no dejar que el miedo a lo desconocido obtener lo mejor de mí. La Biblia dice: "La paz os dejo, mi paz os doy, no como la da el mundo os la doy a ti. No se turbe vuestro corazón, ni tenga miedo "Juan 14:27. ¡Agradezco a Dios por la paz que dejo para nosotros! Esto significa que puedo hacer cualquier cosa que yo me decido a hacer, sólo tengo que confiar en ¡Él y sólo a Él!

¡Siempre voy a proclamar que soy más que vencedora (Romanos 8:37)! Tengo a Jesús como mi Señor y Salvador, ¿a quién temeré? ¡Nada ni nadie!
Otra forma en que estoy demostrando que estoy enfrentando temores y salir de mi zona de comodidad es escribiendo a todos ustedes en un nivel de transparencia del viaje de mi vida.

Mi oración es que todos ustedes que leen estos blogs se encuentran inspiradas y alentadas a saber que no están solas en este viaje. Todos pasamos por cosas de la vida y juntos podemos presionar a la meta (Filipenses 3:14) y cumplir el propósito que Dios tiene para nuestras vidas.



Dios te bendiga siempre,
María Guzmán

How To Get Past Our Good Intentions

Happy New Year! Yes, the beginning of the year always comes in with excitement and anticipation because it marks a new beginning...a fresh start. This is the time of the year when many people (self included) create lists of all the areas in our lives that we resolve to change. You know the drill. Somewhere around December 28th, we sit down with our pen and paper and make these carefully thought out plans that are guaranteed to make our lives better. The most common resolution that is sure to top almost everyone’s list is the commitment to Lose Weight. We vow to lose x amount of pounds by June....we plan to exercise a minimum of an hour every single day...we declare to never ever eat anything white (sugar, flour, bread) ever again. Next step, we make our way to our local Target to buy all of the latest and greatest exercise videos and equipment, stock up on the newest, proven effective diet supplements and throw out (or eat up) all of the “bad” foods from our fridges and pantries. Then, we wait for January 1st to get here so that we can get started. Day 1…perfect! Day 2....whoo hooo! Day 3...oops I drank a Pepsi (sugar) Day 4...my big toe hurts so there is no way I can work out.....Day 5...someone baked a cake and it would be rude to not eat any so on Monday, I will start all over again (said on a Tuesday).....and by the end of January, its a wash.

Sound familiar? We really do start out with good intentions, don’t we? So, what happens? Well there a few things that may hinder our success in reaching our goals.

One problem is that we plan to achieve these grand outcomes but we set these unrealistic deadlines for ourselves and we don’t develop a specific plan. It is overwhelming to try and change everything at once. Many years ago my pastor, Dr Ricky Temple at Overcoming By Faith Church, taught a sermon “Success comes in Pieces, not Chunks” If you want to have success, focus on the pieces and not the chunks. So for example, one of my resolutions/goals is to lose weight. Unfortunately, I can afford to lose a lot and I would love to lose all of it before my fortieth birthday which is this September. The total amount that is necessary/desired to lose is overwhelming (50 pounds...sigh)...... and to try to lose it over the next 9 months might be a little unrealistic (unless I make a casting call for the Biggest Loser...LOL)...so I try not to focus on the big “chunk” of weight that I need to lose. Instead I try to focus on what I can do on a daily basis that will positively contribute to my bigger goal. If I eat more fruits and veggies, instead of the box of Little Debbie’s Swiss Roll cakes today, I will take in fewer calories. Less calories= pound lost...hmmmm, sounds simple enough! And maybe if I walk to the end of the block and back when I go out to check the mailbox this afternoon, I will increase my activity and burn even more calories which will also contribute to losing yet another ounce or two....see the pattern? I may or may not reach my intended goal by the end of the year....only God knows that.....but, I do know that practicing these actions daily will put me one step closer to reaching my goal. I don’t become discouraged with occasional failures; instead I allow them to motivate me further by taking it one day at a time.

Another thing...resolving to start or stop doing a certain activity has absolutely no value unless you have the proper motivation for stopping or starting that activity. So tell me, why do you want to lose weight? Is it just for vanity or are you looking for a healthier lifestyle? My motivation for losing weight is so that I don’t want to develop diabetes or high blood pressure. Both of these diseases run in my family, but I am determined to break that generational curse. According to the American Diabetes Association, just 30 minutes a day of moderate physical activity, coupled with a 5-10% reduction in body weight by making changes in diet (increase fruit/veggie and whole grain intake), produced a 58% reduction in diabetes. That’s it?!? Pretty easy, huh? Yes, I can do that! Whenever I am feeling lazy and don’t want to go to the gym, these findings come to mind and I have even developed a little saying…“30 minutes a day keeps diabetes away!” Corny? Yes...but it motivates me and helps me to keep my goal a priority.

Finally, Philippians 4:14 tells us, “I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.”(NIV) This is one of my favorite daily declarations. I simply believe that God will give me whatever strength that I need to reach my goals and I put my trust totally in Him. Period. In all things, rely on God’s strength to help you and to encourage you to stay on task. John 15:5 declares, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” If God is the center of your New Year’s resolution, it has chance for success, depending on your commitment to it. If it is God’s will for something to be fulfilled, He will enable you to fulfill it. So before creating your list of resolutions/goals...take a moment and talk to God about what it is that He would have you to change and pray that He gives you the wisdom to fulfill those goals. God will never let you fail!

So now, let’s pull out our list of this years resolutions, review them and see if there are any ways to modify your plans to make them more specific and achievable. Don’t be afraid to re-evaluate them every week or every month either. Feel free to make adjustments through out they year.....after all, they aren’t written in stone!

I pray and ask God that we will all reach our goals for 2010 and that each day...every action step along the way makes us better women. Throughout the year, I plan to update you on any progress made (or not) on my weight loss journey to meet my goal.



I will post my next blog, Monday, January 18th. I hope to see you then.

In Christian Love,
Sasha







Tuesday's Blog: Maria Guzman...Life Unscripted

It Only Takes One Decision to Change Your Life.

Decisions are something that we have to make every day from the moment we wake up to the moment we lie down. The alarm goes off, “Do I hit the snooze button again or do I get up now?” I’m tired, “Do I go to bed early or try to stay up and watch a little TV?” And in between those two every day events, there are so many more decisions to make. Some we do by habit, others we do from commitment and often we are just going with the flow. But there are times in our lives that one poor decision can have lasting consequences that can be very devastating. Driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol can put you in a wheel chair for the rest of your life, cause you to be responsible for the death or injury of others, or even send you to jail. It can also take your life. But there is a flip side to all of this and that is, one good decision can also change the caliber of your life for the better.

Being a teacher of women, someone asked me a couple of weeks ago, “What information would you give women to help them be successful in their New Year’s resolutions?” I’m not a big fan of “New Year’s Resolutions” so I had to take a minute to think about what’s the common thread for us as women on resolutions. The more I thought about it the more I realized the list of things we jump up and say we are going to do or would like to do for the New Year is quite substantial. But there is one thing I can think of that will cover anything on that list and more. It is, “This year, I’m going to obey God!” Yep, that about says it all.

Somehow as Believers we have gotten off track to think that we can pick and choose what we do as far as the Word of God is concerned. Beep! Wrong!!! If we are going to live to our fullest potential then we have to start with, “What does God have to say about this in my life?” And whatever it is, I’m going to do it!

How do we get started? I suggest that you begin with taking a hard look at that thing you want to change the most. For most of my adult life, I struggled with my weight. I would lose weight only to gain it back and even pick up some extra pounds I didn’t have before. But when I began to see (through the Word of God) that my eating was much deeper than just taking in too many calories or not exercising enough, then I was able to get to the root of my problem. I was using food to help me deal with certain emotions. It was a god to me and also a comfort in some ways. The truth is, God did not make food to comfort us, He made it for fuel and nourishment to the body. He never intended for food to be our friend, *Yeshua, is our Friend. And the Holy Spirit is the one in which we gain and receive comfort. As I began to get to the root of my overeating and made the decision to treat my body as the temple of God and take authority over my flesh, things turned around for me. As I took one day at a time, focusing on obedience to God, food began to lose the hold it had had for years. That was the biggest blessing to me, I was FREE!! The extra blessing or the gravy you might say was that I did begin to lose weight, dropped about 5 sizes, and I have not gained it back.

I used my weight issue as an example because losing weight and getting healthy is one of the top 3 New Years resolutions for women. But no matter what it is that you want to change in your life, you first must realize you cannot do it apart from Yeshua and obedience. You cannot expect your finances to change for the better, if you don’t do what God says concerning your money. If you don’t tithe then you are going to have money problems. If you spend your bill money on things that you shouldn’t then you will always find yourself behind in your bills and your credit rating low. Ask yourself, “Why is it that you are such a poor steward of your money? How do you view money?” We must get to the root of why we struggle or have problems in certain areas in our lives. Deciding to obey God period will change your life forever….for the Good!

There is no easy or might I say, lazy, way to achieve this. You must spend time reading the Bible. But I do want to say, that the King James Version is not “the be all to end all” that some people believe. First, Yeshua didn’t speak King James English, He spoke Hebrew and Aramaic. So for anyone who has been taught that King James is the only real Bible, you now know better and are free to try other translations. I say this because over the years I have met too many women with this misconception, and since King James can be somewhat difficult to read, they stopped trying. So if you don’t have a translation that suits you, please look for one that does. Also if you are not one who has been reading your Bible on a consistent basis, please don’t try to go from 0 to 90 all at once and try to read a chapter every day when you hardly read a chapter a month, or better yet, don’t try the formula for reading the Bible in a year. Make a realistic commitment. It can be 15 minutes day. But whatever it is, stick to it. You will also need a good Bible concordance and study guide. Another biggie, you must read the Old Testament too. It is a must, because without it you won’t really understand God, and it will help you with your understanding of the New Testament. And if possible, please attend a Women’s Bible Study. A good Women’s Bible study will help you have a renewed mind in Christ and His way of how a woman of God should be.

Second, surround yourself with women who are positive in the Lord, and stay away from the self-righteous, judgmental ones who think they have arrived. There is a little test I tell women to try to help them judge where people are at. It is often impossible to tell from an outward appearance who people really are because so many in the church have practiced and polished their appearance of being holy in such a way, that new converts or baby Christians are easily fooled. Take a biblical truth you know is right, and really flows against what the world says, and twist it a bit to be more mainstream than God and see what this person’s reaction is to you. Do they agree and cosign your foolishness? Are they huffy and self-righteous in correcting you? Or do they lovingly guide you back on track? You want the latter. Let me give you an example why it is so important to be grouped with the right people.

I was mentoring a young woman who had been struggling with letting go of a relationship that she had so desperately wanted to workout. And in her desperation she had really made some very poor decisions concerning this man, but when she did decide to be obedient to God she began to pull away from that lifestyle. There was also a very well known female minister throughout the city of Philadelphia, who happened to befriend this young woman. One day she was visiting her and she began to question this young woman about her child’s father, and when the young woman shared that it didn’t seem that he wanted to marry her, this well seasoned, well known woman of God, told her that she had to use her feminine wiles to help him see that she was it. WRONG!!! The blessing in all of this was that this young woman had really made the decision to obey God, had been in the Word concerning this matter and knew that what this minister was telling her was wrong!!

The dangerous part of all of this is that if this encounter had happened two months before it did, the young woman could have easily agreed with this woman and found herself in even more trouble. I’m not just sharing one side with you, because as a leader in our church I began to watch this minister, and it turned out she was giving wrong information to several woman and it was addressed. I am sharing this story (with permission) because I want you to understand that you must know the Word for yourself, and it is essential to group yourself with women who not only know the Word of God, but have made the decision to live by it through “Obedience”.

Sisters rise up and be in the group of virgins who are prepared for her Groom. Do not be one of the ones caught without oil. See Matthew 25:1-10 in your translation of choice.

Blessings.....Pat Betters

Note from Ponnie: *Yeshua is the Hebrew name for our Messiah. Christians call Him, Jesus, but in Pat’s blogs the Messiah will be referred to in His Hebrew name of Yeshua.

Monday’s Blogger: Sasha Brown….Beauty & Health