Most of our unhappiness and emotional struggles are caused by the lies we tell ourselves…Until we identity our lies and replace them with the truth, emotional wellbeing is impossible…Lies are beliefs, attitudes, or expectations that don’t fit reality. And we don’t have to go out looking for them. They come to us. We learn our lies from a variety of sources—our parents, our friends, the culture we live in, and even the church we attend. ~Dr. Chris Thurman~
When we take the time to examine the areas we struggle in
the most, we often find they're rooted in some sort of lie. It could a lie of our own
making, or ones we were told. Either way, lies cause an awful lot of pain and
suffering.
Jesus tells us that satan is the “Father” or “King” of all
lies, so we are forewarned of his antics. He comes to steal, destroy and kill.
Well, a lie can achieve all of that! Lies, have destroyed, families,
friendships, marriages, split churches and caused people their jobs and good reputations. Right
there you have things stolen and destroyed. And how many people have died
because of a lie? More than we will probably ever know.
There was a lie I was told at a very early age, which proved
to be the root of unhappiness and emotional struggles for more than two thirds of
my life. I am just days from turning 62.
The lie told was, “You are nothing and you will never be nothing!
I wished you had never been born!” Wow! And I believed every word of it for
many years. And even now that I know the truth, at times I still must remind
myself, of God’s deep love for me.
I’ve been re-reading (first read back in the late 90’s)
a great book by Carol Kent. (Secret Longings of the Heart) And in it, she
listed some of the lies that we as Christians have told ourselves or learned
along the way.
- I must be a perfect Christian.
- Everyone should love me and approve of me.
- If I am a good Christian, life should be fair.
- It’s a sin to feel depressed.
- If I am living in fellowship with God, I should never feel anger toward Him or other people.
- It’s my job to meet everyone’s needs.
- If I feel worried, I’m a bad Christian.
- If God loved me, bad things would not happen to me.
- God will bless me with health and happiness if I work hard for Him.
- When there is so much real tragedy in the world, it’s wrong for me to feel grief over little things.
I also want to add:
- God loves them more than me.
- Yes, God can do it, but He won’t do it for me.
I would love to have the time and space to go over the
list in depth (you can get the book and see what Carol has to say), but that is
not possible in a blog, so I’m going to touch on things in hopes that it will
provoke you to think about where, if any place, you have some lies lurking in the shadows you need to
deal with.
For one, there is no such thing as “Perfect” anything. Yet,
it doesn’t stop us from striving to achieve that which is impossible. We want
to be the perfect wife, mother, friend, hostess, and Christian! There is no
such “creature” yet we have bought into the lie that we can still hit the
perfect mark if we try hard enough.
Let’s look at, “If I’m a good Christian and if I work hard
enough for God, He will bless me with health and happiness.” What is a good
Christian anyway? The only one called, “good” in the Bible is Christ. I think
we should keep this in mind. And work really doesn’t have a lot to do with our
relationship with God. We think that if we do, this, that and the other
(following a formula of some sort) we will win God’s approval or recognition.
Sorry, salvation and Kingdom living does not work like that. We can’t manipulate God into doing things for us.
We all have probably struggled with anger toward God,
feelings of depression, trying to be a people pleaser, wanting everyone to love and
acknowledge us and have lost sleep because of worry!
I’m sure most have succumbed to feelings of self-pity and thoughts
that God does not love us as much as someone else. And yes, we believe that God
can do anything—but question if He will do it for us?
And yes, bad things do happen—we live in a world of sin.
Take a moment to digest what you have just read and think
about how even just one of the above mentioned lies has caused you pain
or struggles in your life. A life built
on a lie is as a house built on the sand—when the storm comes, it cannot stand.
Sisters, as Dr. Thurman stated, “Until we identity our lies
and replace them with the truth, emotional wellbeing is impossible.” How do we
identity the lies we have been trying to live off and make them truth?
By simply talking to God about our lives and studying the Bible!
It’s not complicated—at all. There are no 8 steps, 6 secrets
or any formula to follow. It’s all about relationship with God.
Only through much prayer and studying God’s Word, have I
come to know that God truly loves me with an everlasting love and makes no mistakes. I finally know how valuable I am because He says I am. And as Jesus promised, “The truth has made
me free!”
Study to be “free”
of the lies that bring pain, destruction, disappointment and heartache.
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