Walk…Don’t run!

One day while reading Paul was fully persuaded and convinced of what he was talking about, I had an “Aha moment,” and realized I needed to be more like him. I needed to be fully persuaded about the things of God. No, more wavering back and forth.

Girls, I would love to tell you it just happened overnight—but it didn’t. It has taken determination and a mindset and attitude that I was going to agree with God in all matters. Like it or not!

Over the years I’ve not only read the bible, but studied it. And then I started to stand on what it said. I took one thing at a time and then one day, I found myself fully persuaded that Romans 8:28 is real and applied to my life! “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” And because I did, it became my hope in the most difficult times in life.

Now, I’m not saying its easy, or that no matter what I never falter or doubt. No, I’m not implying that, but once I get over the initial shock or disappointment of the matter—I can begin to stand on Romans 8:28, in full trust.

Through this scripture, I am convinced no matter what I’ve done in the past, or what things I’ve put into motion (even in my most sinful days), God is and has used them for the better. It has helped me to look at my life and no longer feel guilty for the poor decisions and wrong choices I’ve made. It helps me to have courage to forge on when life is hard—because I'm fully persuaded God is working it out somehow and someway. It is a reminder of His promise to never leave or forsake me.

Yup! I get all that from that one scripture. But that is not all—it also tells me not to run.

Sisters, I’m no different than anyone else. When the Lord allows the pressure to be put on, I want to run. I am tempted to take things into my own hands, especially when God seems to be taking too long to make something happen. In fact, I have run and taken things in my own hands before. And like Sarah, I ended up with a mess! But now I know better, so I do better.

Growing up feeling unlovable and unwanted put a huge hole in my heart. And yes, I spent too many years looking for love in all the wrong places, but once I found the only Love who could fill the hole and make me whole—I still didn’t believe or really trust. It took time for me to build a relationship with God and believe He loved me.

Too many times I’ve questioned His love. I often wondered, “If He really loved me why did He allow my childhood to be so horrendous?” But the more fully persuaded I became about Romans 8:28, the more I could see how He used it all for good.  

 “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because He has anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and recovery of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed.” Luke 4:18 (NKJV) Yup! That is what my ministry for women and children in crisis has been for years, and still continues to be to this day.

God used my hurt, pain and sorrow, so I could help and show others the way. I have lived through many trials in my life. In fact, I wasn’t sure I was going to make it sometimes. But I did—and I'm anointed to help others.

I would so love to tell you that at age 63, God has eased up on me in my older age, but that is not true. The past 6 months have been rough and a great learning experience. Did I want it to hurry up and be over? Yes, I did! Was I tempted to make plans for an out? You better believe it! But there is no sin in temptation; it only comes about once we act on it. Therefore I’m still waiting. ~Smile~

It never ceases to amaze me how much God loves us. Here I am, 63 years of age, and He is not done with me yet. He’s still concerned about the things that are holding me back from being my best.

There are some hurts in life, which take a lifetime to go through. And I am happy to say that I am no longer a wounded soul, by any means, but I still have some issues from my past. What I’ve just learned recently, is, I stuff things when I should deal with them head on. And my situation hasn’t changed yet, because now I have to walk through this revelation and that takes time. Well, let me rephrase that—it has changed in that I’m changing and handling things differently. But my outward circumstances are still the same.

And the past 6 months hasn’t just been about me. Nope, in the midst of all the chaos—I’ve still been Luke 4:18, on many occasions. You see my dear sisters; it’s never really just about us.

Life on this earth is hard. In fact, we have sisters and brothers all over the world who are suffering in ways we can’t even imagine. But how is it that they hold on in such extreme circumstances? They believe! They believe the Word and God! They are hungry to learn and know the truth, and like little children they believe and not question. Their mindset is, “If it is in the bible then it is true. If God said it, I believe!”

The Bible is loaded with God’s promises, his way of doing things and so much more. But, we have to study it to know them. And as James says, “Don’t just be a reader of the Word, but a doer also.” And that means stepping out in faith when you are afraid. That means, standing still and waiting on God when it seems He has forgotten you. It means—walking through the trials and tribulations of this world, believing God is handling things—that He’s working it out! And again I say, “Walk.”

No one wants to experience hard times and life tragedies, but we must. No one escapes. But in Christ Jesus we can do all things we are called to do. And the truth of the matter is—we can’t run away from anything God has set as part of His great plan for us anyhow. We only prolong the lesson when we take things into our own hands. Changing jobs, leaving husbands (Now if he is abusive in anyway…yes, leave the home.), moving and skipping town before God’s timing, changes nothing. Because whatever the issue is, we take it with us.

As painful as it can be, it is during the hard times; we grow and mature the most. It is in these times we learn to trust God. And when we make it to the other side, we are able to look back and see what God was doing and that He hadn’t forgotten us.

Knowing and trusting the One who knows all about us and has the power to make things right or better, is the only real way to live in the Kingdom of God.

Hold on...now this is a hard one, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-8 (NIV) It’s hard because, when life is on fire, the last thing our flesh and soul wants to do is count it joy, let alone pure joy. But if this is what the Word says we are to do, then we must work on doing it. Amen!

We all need to be fully persuaded when it comes to the things of the Lord. We all need that one scripture that is rooted so deep in our heart, that when the dust settles, we find that we are still standing.

Read and study your Bibles. Agree with God. Then walk…don’t run!

Until next week...

Blessings and Hugs,

Ponnie

God Knows!

“No one knows how bad my marriage is.” “No one knows the sadness I feel.” “No one knows my daily struggle with pain.”

“Nobody understands my grief.” “Nobody knows how depressed I am.” “Nobody knows how hard my life is.”

Sisters, too many of us are failing when it comes to believing and trusting God. Somehow, our enemy has succeeded in fooling us into thinking that no one knows our troubles and nobody cares. He has isolated us, and taken our hearts captive. Instead of the joy of the Lord, we are filled with sadness and fear.

Have you ever tried to make someone understand your problems, but it seems they just don’t get it? I know I have many times. And the more I tried, the less they seemed to care or just weren’t capable. And the truth of the matter was probably a little of both.

When life is hard, we look for compassion and sympathy from others. We can often use a shoulder to cry on or the soft touch of another. Maybe we get it or maybe we don’t. And thus begins our real troubles.

I mentioned earlier how our enemy fools us. And it is so true—he is the master of deceit. Jesus himself called him, “The father of all lies!” No one is greater at trickery then he is. And that is okay, because “Greater is He that lives in us, then is in the world.” In other words, “God has made provision—Christ Jesus!”

But we can’t lay all the blame on *satan. No. There are times we must take ownership for our wrong thinking and the isolation we feel—we are the culprits.

Sisters, no one lives this life without troubles, trials and tribulations. In fact our Savior told us we will see such things. But! He also told us to be of a good cheer for He has overcome the world. In other words, “He has taken care of it.” This is what He did on the Cross for us. But, unless we take the time to dig in and really know what He is talking about, we will continue to be swept away by the problems of this life.

Let’s take a moment to explore how our enemy works. I personally believe that Eve had more than one encounter with the devil. And I say this because as a woman, I know we like and need to be wooed. I think it took a few encounters and conversations for him to plant the seeds in her mind and heart. I find it hard to believe that he was able to convince her in one chance meeting that God was holding something back from her. No, that took time and becoming familiar.

This is where the old adage, “Silver tongued devil,” comes from. And he uses the same MO (motive of operation) on us today and it still works like a charm. He slow walks and talks us into believing that no one cares and nobody understands. And especially God!

But here’s the difference between us and Eve. She didn’t have the written Word. She didn’t have the finished work of the Cross.

Take a moment to look at her encounter with satan (Genesis 3:1-4) verses, Jesus’ encounter with him. (Matthew 4:1-11) Again, satan didn’t change his MO, he was trying to work the same thing on Jesus. But unlike Eve who tried to reason with the devil, Jesus told him exactly what the Word of God had to say. Not a half truth such as satan tried to use on him—but the unadulterated truth of God! Think about it, the Word, was telling him the Word! We can really spend sometime meditating on that one.

And like Eve, we get into trouble when we try to reason with the enemy, versus jack him up with the truth! And that’s because we don’t really know the God of the truth.

Every blog I wrote last year, I pretty much encouraged you to read your Bibles and spend time with God, and I’m going to keep on doing it! Why? Because too many of us are still lacking in our relationship with God and knowledge of Kingdom living.

We say we are Christians (followers of Christ), yet, we know very little of the One we say we follow. We are living lives that are not a reflection of God’s love and greatness. And we are poor witness to His goodness and mercy.

Why should anyone want your God, when they see you and your life are a mess? But, they will want your God when your life is a mess—but you are not. That’s what intrigues people. They want to know how is it you can go through what you are experiencing and have joy and peace.

Whenever we find ourselves living a joyless existence, we must question what is going on. We must stop and check ourselves against what the Word says. Our enemy is labeled as a thief looking to kill, steal and destroy us! And if he can steal our joy and hope, and kill our dreams—then he can destroy our testimony. And he is more than happy to do that!

And let me warn you sisters…we are never too old to fall into the trap. For the past few months, I was allowing my life circumstances to steal my joy. I was having a temporary bout of insanity, because I was forgetting who I was and all that was within me. And I wasn’t reading the Word as much as I usually do. I let the cares of this world be a distraction to me, so know that I am not just making up stuff—the battle is real. That’s the bad news, but the good news is…we already have the victory! Amen!

Sisters, read your Bibles! It is impossible to trust a God you don’t know. It is impossible to stand on promises you don’t know. And it’s impossible to rely on a Comforter you hardly know and acknowledge. Read your bibles and you will find that not only does God know all about your troubles, but He cares and has made provision.

Next week is part 3 and end of the series, “Walk Don’t Run”

*I never capitalize the “s” in satan’s name unless it is the first word of the sentence. I don’t feel he deserves it…just a Ponnie thing. ~Smile~

Until next week...

Blessings and Hugs,

Ponnie

Waiting On the One Who Knows

During the week between Christmas and New Year's, I received what I thought at the time…bad news. I say, “At the time,” because as it turned out it was not bad news, just not what I wanted to hear.

January of 2015, I turned 62. This translated into many new benefits and one of them, affordable housing for seniors. My sister, who is a real estate broker, gave me several leads to the best management companies, websites and nice areas to move. It was an exciting time! Well, for a minute it was. The waiting lists are long. Some of them are so long; they are not even accepting applications. I mean we are talking 7 years long.

What I thought might be an easy endeavor turned into work and proved to be time consuming. But, I waded through it all and found places and areas I thought I might like to live, put in applications and began the wait. Well, after 10 months I was contacted by a place I really wanted to live.

Yippee!  So, I thought.

To make a long story as short as possible (without leaving the important stuff), there was a lot of back and forth. The original contact letter was forwarded from my old address, not to me, but my oldest daughter. Calls were made, and new contact information mailed. My daughter called me about 2 weeks later with a message to call the manager of this place. She had contacted her (emergency contact) because she was trying to set up an appointment with me and said, “I hung up on her.”

No! This did not happen.

Called and we setup an interview. After about a week I hadn’t received the confirmation letter with the list of what I needed to bring. Called left messages for 3 days and finally spoke with the manager, who told me she never received the new contact info and had sent everything to my old address—again.

Yes, we rescheduled and she took my current information. Needless to say, the day of the interview, I called to make sure I would be able to park in their lot, and the assistant advised me the manager had been out sick for a couple of days and my appointment was not in her book.

Really!

I was reassured I would be rescheduled and hear from her next week. Well, it never happened. And I called the week of Christmas—she didn’t get back to me. I called the week of New Years, and she had her assistant tell me a story, which I knew was not true, due to previous conversations.

When I hung up, a wave of disappointment, confusion and self-pity all showed up at once! My eyes watered and my soul was embarking on a good cry, when I quickly made the decision to remember that God was in control! And if this was the place for me, everything would have gone through. One tear fell, and that was it.

You see, I really want to move. And God knows I want to move. He also knows I have struggled with Him moving me to where I now live. And the reason I have not totally faltered in all of this is, I believe with all my heart (most days) that He is working it all together for my good. I don’t know how He is doing it, or why it has to be this way—but I still believe.

Not only is this senior building beautiful, it is in a lovely suburban neighborhood I once lived in before. Sisters, I really wanted to move there. But now, not so much! I still love the area, but I have had too many encounters with a manager who is not the most honest person and she doesn’t handle her business well. And even with this knowledge, I still have to fight to stand in faith that God is working it out and He has a better plan.

Are any of you in this same type of predicament? Are you waiting for things to change? Are you hoping that today will be the day, only to climb into bed a little disappointed because it wasn’t? Do you sometimes struggle to wake to a new day, with a heart of gratitude, versus one of sadness and disappointment?

Yes, it is easier to quote, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” then to actually live it.               (I Thessalonians 5:18)  It can be a knockdown, drag out fight to praise God when it seems He has forgotten you. And remembering that though our enemy may mean it for evil, God will use it for good, can be almost impossible on any given day.

The key to any problem we may have—is trusting God. Fighting the good fight of the faith, is how we make it! (I Timothy 6:12 CJB)

But there’s a reason some of us are not having victory in our lives. We simply don’t know the God who knows what’s going on and why? Because we don’t really know Him, we still find ourselves in the same place we were last year, and the year before that. We struggle to believe. And instead of moving forward (from faith to faith), we are moving backwards and losing ground. Trust is not easy.

My makeup can be a lot like Hannah. God closed her womb, and because she desired a child so deeply, she moved to the place where she gave Him what he desired of her all along. And thus we have the prophet Samuel. Click to read (I Samuel 1, NKJV)

There are times God has worked in me the same way—holding back that which my heart wants only to give Him its place and move into what it is He desires.

For some reason I have been under the delusion of me living a life of freedom and gaiety! But I am beginning to have a sneaky suspicion—it is not going to go down like that.

I’m at the point of no more…why Lord? How come Lord? Or when Lord?
     

It’s now—where are we going from here Lord? What is it that you want from me?

In order for us to put our trust in someone, we must know them. And this is why; so many Believers are struggling in responding to life’s curveballs. We don’t really know the One we say we trust. And are therefore suspect to what He says He will do.

Sure, most of us believe that God can do, but we are very unsure if He will do it for us. It's difficult to wait if one is not sure.

With all our New Year’s resolutions and declarations—make getting to know the One who Knows, a priority. And trust me—you will be able to holdout and wait. And, find some joy up in there too!

Read your Bibles!

Today’s blog is the first of a 3 part series. Next week, “God Knows!”

Until next week...

Blessings and Hugs,

Ponnie

Why Lord? Why Is This Happening?

Happy New Year everyone!

Every year around this time, all the morning talk shows are going on about losing weight, stop smoking, decluttering and organizing our lives. I wanted to ride the wave, but in a spiritual sense and then…life unscripted happened! And I needed to write about it instead. Fear not—you will still get the other blog. ~Smile~

Tovah (my youngest daughter) who currently teaches in Honduras was home for a 2 week Christmas break. (And yes, it did go by way to fast.) She came in with one suitcase half full and left with two packed to the brim.

A couple of months ago, we put out a call to friends and family to help purchase a laptop for the son of one of the school maids she’s befriended. There was also a need for more books for her classroom and other items. And as usual, the Lord showed up big time and showed off. This is why she was taking back so much. In fact she had to leave a couple of things behind (apartment stuff) until the summer.

As people began to make commitments I started to pray the suitcases would make it through customs and immigration intact! I knew Tovah would also have some perishable items, such as candy, bacon bits and other goodies she can only get here. And thus begins the story of life unscripted….

We said our teary, “Goodbyes” at the Philadelphia airport 4:30am Sunday morning. Her 6am flight to Miami, left a half an hour late. When they arrived, they were in a holding pattern for 45 minutes and at one point the pilot advised if they didn’t land soon they would have to go to Ft. Lauderdale for fuel. Needless to say, she missed her connecting flight to Honduras. But not before she ran to a gate only to find it was the wrong one and was blessed to be driven to the right gate only to find her plane had left.

Oh, it gets even better. She had to stand in the booking line for almost 2 hours and while there the last direct flight to Honduras took off without her.

At this point she is tried and frustrated, but I reminded her to be calm and if she had to stay to ask for food and hotel vouchers.

We were both praying.

When she finally got to the counter, she was told she would have to spend the night at the airport for a flight the next morning. The agent refused to give her any vouchers—flat out!

Her cell phone was acting up and I’m getting bits and pieces of info via Facebook messenger.

The agent finally helped her to get a flight to San Pedro Sula, Honduras, where she would get a flight to Tegucigalpa her original destination.  It took her 3 flights and 12 hours to get Home. Oh and did I mention her cell phone (with a Honduran number) stopped working altogether! And her luggage didn’t make it with her.

Once she landed in Honduras, she had to go through immigrations twice, had a body search because the underwire in her bra kept going off, and ran into security that wouldn’t let her through without a paper she had already given. And to top it all off, she forgot she had purchased a ginger ale soda and when she came back through (from checking on when she was going to get her luggage) they had to search her again!  She was told her luggage would be coming in the next morning on a 9am flight from Miami.

Praise God, she carried the new laptop in a backpack along with hers and her tablet on the plane as her carryon.

The school van was waiting for her when you finally made it to Tegucigalpa, but she was told there wasn’t enough room for her to ride back the next day to get her luggage.

“Okay dear Lord—why? And what is going on here?!”

Tovah arrived at her apartment after 11pm (my time), exhausted, hungry and with a throbbing headache. Sleep was all she wanted.

She found favor the next day and a teacher not only drove her to the airport to retrieve her luggage, but to the market to get food.

Was her luggage at the airport when she got there? Well, sort of. It had been bumped to the 11:15am flight and they were just getting the luggage off when she got there. She was told to wait 20 minutes, still no luggage. Sent to another place—still no luggage. “Please God, let them find my luggage!” she prayed.  Finally! Someone realized it had been sent to the warehouse and she had it within a few minutes.

Needless to say it was a crazy 24 hours from the time she landed in Miami, to the time she picked up her luggage in Honduras. And the entire time, I kept asking God to show me the purpose to all this.

I’m sure there are things I may never know, but while skyping with Tovah as she unpacked—He answered my prayers. Her bags were never checked by customs in Honduras. Everything was there!

This was huge! You may not think so, but there is a perception in Honduras that ALL Americans are rich. And when going through customs, they can take your stuff at will. Someone from her school tried to bring back 3 bags of a particular popcorn they like, and a customs officer opened one bag (to see if it was okay to let through) and ate it in front of her face. (She did get to keep the two bags.)

Tovah had a lot of books in English for her class library which are hard to get in Honduras and cost a lot to ship there. Because of the abundance, they could have easily said she had too many and taken what they wanted. She had gifts of fingernail polish, sample perfumes, DVD’s, CD’s and much more.

The events of her day was all part of God’s plan for her bags to skip a customs and immigration check.

How, I wish I could tell you I took it all in stride, but that wouldn’t be the truth. And yes, when the last communication I had with her was a quick message that she was in San Pedro Sula, waiting to board the plan to Tegucigalpa (which was a one hour flight) and I still hadn’t heard from her 5 hours later that fear didn’t try to set in — I would be lying.  Sisters, I had to fight fear with everything I had and remind myself that God was with her and taking care of her. It wasn’t easy though.

I even tried to contact a couple of her friends there via Facebook, but no one answered, until after I had heard from Tovah. It was the Lord’s way of making me wait and trust. At times trusting is easier said than done. But He uses situations like these to grow our faith in Him.

Sisters, from the moment I realized Tovah missed her flight (was tracking online), the Holy Spirit kept saying to me, “And [you know Ponnie] that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” (My paraphrase)

Hindsight is always 20/20, and once I sat down and thought about all the events that had occurred, I realized without a doubt that all the things Tovah was taking back for others already had the favor of the Lord on them. God doesn’t deal in foolishness and He would not have had so many give to meet the needs of others to allow a dishonest customs officer (or anyone else) take any of it.

I did contact the airline to find out what their policy is when you miss a connecting flight and it is not your fault or an act of God. I was advised to have Tovah file a complaint online so that she could receive some type of compensation and they were very apologetic, because she should have been offered vouchers for a hotel and food. (But the Lord had other plans.) We will see how it plays out, but that would be just like the God, to put a little icing on all of this…LOL!

I pray Tovah and my adventure encourages you to remember that when life unscripted shows up and things are jumping off the hook and you don’t understand why—remember Romans 8:28.

Until next week...

Blessings and Hugs,

Ponnie