The Action of Love.....

This time next week most of us in the USA will be preparing to celebrate our national holiday “Thanksgiving.” And like any other manmade holiday it brings with it joy and sadness. Personally, I’m not real big on manmade holidays except that they are days off from a workweek that otherwise would be “business as usual.” I don’t think many of us complain about extra time off. My problem with most manmade holidays is that they create a haven for pain, heartache and loneliness. My ministry exposes me to the side of life that is most unpleasant and I have seen year after year how people are affected when they are on the outside looking in.

When growing up, Thanksgiving Day was my favorite of all holidays and my mother hosted it every year at her house. Today we live in a society that eats turkey every day, but that was not the case 50 years ago. A big roasted turkey with homemade stuffing was special and only happened two or three times a year. Sweet potatoes were plentiful which meant my Gigi (godmother/aunt) was going to make her infamous pies and my mother her wonderful stuffing and macaroni and cheese. And if any of my family came down from New York, we were blessed with my Aunt Mickey’s fabulous homemade yeast rolls. I am getting hungry just remembering those wonderful smells and times. But as I got older, it became a burden of sorts to me. My mother was a nurse and often worked on Thanksgiving and left so much of the work on me. That was the beginning of the best of times becoming the worst of times. Yet I do realize that Thanksgiving can bring great joy to friends and family too, but today I want to look at how we can make it through on the rougher side of things.

There are two great factors that help us get through the rough or tough times in life and they are “Faith” and “Love” and not necessarily in that order. It all depends on the life circumstance that dictates which one (or even both) has to step up and be the lead. You can say with your mouth you love, but if your actions don’t back it up, your words are as empty as a cloud without water. And just as useless too. Check out I Corinthians 13:3-8 (in the Message Bible), it describes the actions of love and how it presents itself to others. Don’t have that translation, check it out at Biblegateway.com.

Family gatherings can take on a flavor of their own that are not always palatable to say the least. I have a friend who is a mortician and has done hundreds of funerals over the years. She has witnessed on more than one occasion family members having knock down drag out fights inside a church during the funeral service. How many of us have witnessed or even been a part of family arguments at birthday parties, and reunions? I have! Well, Thanksgiving gatherings are not exempt from this type of confusion and bad behavior. And right now some of us are dreading having to have dinner with some of our family, but we haven’t figured out a way to get out of it short of lying. Well, I want you to know that there is hope and help on ways to get through it.

I think just about all families have that hard to get along with person that everyone sort of secretly wishes wouldn’t show up. Or you are faced with sibs who just rub each other the wrong way. A friend of mine has 3 sisters and the oldest and the one right after her have always fought like cats and dogs. And 40 some odd years later they still do. Every time the family gets together everyone is on edge hoping they make it through the evening without the two of them ruining it for everyone else. I also know a woman who started feeding her neighbors on Thanksgiving just so her kids wouldn’t come. She just couldn’t take the bickering and fighting amongst them. The bright side of that was it turned out to be a wonderful ministry. ~Smile~ Some of you might be a little anxious about the company you will be keeping on Thanksgiving Day, especially when it comes to those who have hurt or wounded you. I’m sure there is probably one or two of you who are not going to be with family because you refuse to be in the same room with certain people. And last but not least there are some of us, who have just thrown our hands up and have decided to be done with folks…..the end! This can all change with just one decision on your part, and that is “To walk in Love.”

One thing about family gatherings, they have a tendency to shine the light on unforgiveness, grudges, and judgment, past hurts, envy and jealousy. And if the thought of being around certain people next week has you a little down or your heart fluttering, then take a deep look as to why? Two of the biggest culprits are unforgiveness and a judgmental attitude. Not always, but most often.

There just isn’t enough time to talk about the many reasons why siblings become estranged from one another so we’ll just look at a few. A real big one is money! Borrowed money that has not been paid back will cause brother and sister never to speak again. Or the user! You know the one who only calls when they need something and never gives anything in return. How about, “I don’t like how they take advantage of our parents,” or “I’m the one who does everything and they never lift a finger to help.” And we must not forget how we are very good at judging the lifestyles of others, especially if they are not living as we think they should.

I don’t want anyone to misunderstand me; I am not trivializing emotional pain or heartache. I have lived a lifetime of it myself, but Love (God’s love) covers all of it. So even if your sister is married to the man you loved and met first and you somehow blame her for stealing him away, you can forgive and let it go. You can even forgive your brother who stole from you and your parents. The list of why family members don’t want to be with other family members can be lengthy. And there are cases where we may not need to be with certain people, but even in those situations we still need a heart check to make sure forgiveness has taken place for us. And that their past actions have not put us in prison.

In Romans 12:18, we are told that as long as it is within our power we are to live in peace with others. That also lets us know that we do have the power to forgive and let go. Even when it is hard, we still have been given the power through the Holy Spirit of God, to forgive and walk in love. Does walking in love mean that you become a doormat, trashcan or fire hydrant? No!! But it does mean that you will take back letting anyone else steal your joy in life. Walking in love will enable you to stop by your grandmother’s house (knowing your father will be there with the woman he walked out on your family for) to visit the family you love on your father’s side. Walking in love is walking in freedom.

Declare today that you are a lover of people, just as your Father is! Pray to be able to forgive past hurts and let go. Begin to envision how you are going to give that certain someone a big hug that is genuine. You might also find yourself being prompted by the Holy Spirit of God to ask to be forgiven. Oh yeah, that can happen. I’ve had to apologize when it was not my fault, and I had done no wrong. And be prepared if the person does not receive it. Just accept that you were obedient and that is what matters to God. Blessed are the gentle, for they shall inherit the earth. Matthew 5:5 (New Am Standard Bible)

The truth is my dear sisters it’s not about “us”! But it is about “God” and His Kingdom.
If we are to impress others with who Jesus (Yeshua) is, then they have to see Him in our actions and not just in our words. Love, (God’s love) is an action word, and we must snap into action when it comes to making it right with others. You have no idea who is watching you. And though it might seem as if your actions of love are wasted, you don’t know that to be true, especially since I Corinthians 13, says that love never fails. And you never know when someone might come to you one day to tell you how they saw the true love of God in you, from your actions of love and forgiveness.

I pray that I have provoked you to do a heart check. And even if you think all is well, please do an attitude check. You may not be walking in unforgiveness, but there might be someone you need to stop preaching at and just love on. You could be the someone they’re dreading being around because of how you judge them.

If by any chance you have been feeling a little stressed about the holidays, maybe now you can change your perspective and begin to look forward to being free and having a good time. And even if you are in a country that is not celebrating a national holiday, I hope that you have found what was written today a useful tool for your next social gathering that usually has a little anxiety attached to it.

My dear sisters, life is short and tomorrow is not promised here on this earth, therefore enjoy and take care of every day that you are blessed to have. Make love (God’s love) a part of your everyday life.

Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Who Do You Think You Are?

The question “Who do you think you are?” or “Who does she think she is?” is more times than none posed in a negative way, with sarcasm and a frowned up face. It ends with a question mark and five exclamation marks to follow (?!!!!!). But that is not how I am posing the question to you my dear sisters. I really want to know, “Who do you think you are? I hear silence and crickets chirping. Why? This question is harder to answer than most people think, because it goes way beyond “what you do or your profession.” You’re a doctor. Okay, does that make you kindhearted and honest? Nope. Does it make you a person filled with compassion? Nope. I think we have all encountered a doctor or two who had no people skills whatsoever or treated you like you were just a piece of meat. You’re a teacher. Does that mean that you care about your students who struggle with learning? Nope. You could be one who is counting down the days to retirement. What we do, is not who we are. And I pray that today, I can encourage you to see that you are so much more than you probably realize.

Society has duped us as women into not seeing the true beauty that lives deep within us. We are great in so many ways, but we have been brainwashed to compare ourselves with what the world says is great and unique. When I went to clip art for this week’s picture, my search was “women.” and to my delight I was bombarded with picture after picture of confident women. Let’s take a moment and look at the one I picked. No matter what her title or position, her body language tells you, she is confident and a leader. No matter how many jobs or positions she may have in real life she would take that confidence and leadership ability with her, because that is part of who she is. Do you know my sisters, that every single woman who belongs to the Kingdom of God should be confident with great leadership ability? Well, if you weren’t sure of that, I’m here to assure you that it’s true.

This past weekend I attended a conference the Women of Faith group sponsors for teen girls. It is called The Revolve Tour and it is something I recommend for all teen age girls to experience. Whether they know the Lord or not! I am digressing, but I had to put a plug in for them, so back to my story. I met several really great women, but there was one in particular, that I knew from jump street was a leader. She didn’t have a take over spirit, she didn’t go, me, me, me or anything like that. It was her confidence that was the clue. She was tall in stature and she stood straight, didn’t slouch one bit, held her head high and even wore pumps. Her clothes weren’t fancy or designer because as volunteers we were to wear kaki pants and a black top. Sorry I didn’t read that part of the contract so I must confess I wasn’t dressed like the rest of the ushers. ~Smile~ When we did get a chance to talk and she shared parts of her life with me, (only after I asked) she just reinforced what I had come to realize some time ago, and that is, “confidence” wears well with anything. Confidence stands out in a crowd even if you’re just standing still and looking. Especially when your confidence is rooted in the Lord.

Just as this woman has traveled all over the world and held big positions where she runs things from the big office, that same confidence and leadership qualities that she possesses, should be in each of God’s girls!! Every mother should be leading her children with the confidence of the Lord! Every wife should be confident in her position as a “help mate” to her husband and a leader in her community. Does that mean you have to run for public office? No. You can be a great leader (by example) just in the way you carry yourself. Do you speak to everyone? Is there an elderly person you check in on? Are you willing to help when needed? Do you sweep your neighbors steps even when they don’t do yours? Are you at war with your neighbors or are you blessing them even though they don’t treat you well? As women of God, we should all be leaders in some fashion at our jobs, in our community, households, our kid’s schools, and any of the other hundreds of places we go. Our confidence should always be such that people know from the very first meeting that there is something special about us without us whipping out our Bible, quoting scripture, or shouting at the top of our lungs, “I am a Christian!”

God is explicit in letting us know that, “His ways are not our ways. And His thoughts are not like ours.” Therefore, He does not judge “big” the way the world and most of us do. Obedience of the smallest thing is big to God. Why? Because so many of His children are rebellious in spirit and disobedient to say the least. And He lets us know that obedience is huge to Him by promising us that, “Obedience brings blessings!” You might be the CFO of a huge company, but if the Lord says to you, “Step down and stay at home to raise your children.” And you say, “Not yet, I’m really going places.” Then your big position means nothing to Him versus that woman that answered and said, “Yes, Lord!” I know women who have given up big positions to be home, and if you could see the blessing and anointing on their husbands and children, you would not question God’s decision for them. Has it been easy? Of course not, but it has been worth every day of obedience they have walked in.

Let’s take a look at Jael, she was the wife of Heber and the one who drove the nail in the skull of Sisera. When I say nail, it would really be more like a stake. They used them to hold down the tents they lived in. Now she did something great for God, but what was her preparation like? I couldn’t find a lot about her, but I’m going to surmise that she had to be used to driving the nails (stakes into the ground) or else, she probably wouldn’t have had the confidence to drive it through his temples the way she did. It went all the way through. She literally nailed his head to the ground. It took strength and confidence to do that. I wonder if her life was one of menial labor compared to the glamorous life of the Proverbs 31 woman? To the world her life probably would not come close, but to God they are both great. In fact Jael, might be greater, how many women do you know who would be confident enough to play the scenario through the way she did? (See Judges 4:17-21) It is very possible that Jael might have felt a drudgery of sorts hammering those nails into the ground year after year. She might have felt that she was less than many other women in her tribe, but the one thing we know for sure, she had an upper body strength that women only achieve through physical training. Her position was the preparation for a special job that God had for her.

When I looked up the meaning of Confidence, I found: firm belief in oneself and ones abilities. That is true for the world, but for Believers, our Confidence, is a firm belief in God and His abilities. Also confidence of any sort gives you a feeling of security. So as you begin to believe you are who God says you are, your confidence in Him will grow, and so will you spiritually. God’s confidence grows from the inside out. In other words, you start to feel so good about who you are, that you discover your outward appearance doesn’t match the real you. We often have it backwards. When we are feeling down or our confidence and self esteem are low, we try to fix the outside to make us feel better, but when the inside changes, we want to change the outward to match the real us! That new hair do becomes a must, because what we see in the mirror is not really who we are. We are walking taller with our heads held high and our shoulder’s back. And in that confidence we realize we need a better fitting bra, cause the girls need to be lifted to match our new stance. Confidence that comes from believing you are beautiful because God says so, will help you to find an outfit that looks really good on your size 24 body. You’ll stop saying, “I hate shopping, I can’t find anything that looks good on me.” When our confidence and self esteem are lifted, so is everything else about us. We began to view all aspects of life differently. The reason is, because another light has gone on, taking us out of a dark corner where we stood captive. And freedom feels real good!!

It does not matter if you are someone like me, who never finished college, or you can be working on your second PhD and a scholar. You could be a stay at home mom, in between jobs, on disability, retired, single, a wife, or a single mom. You can clean houses for a living or manage a corporation that spans the entire West Coast. If you are in the family of Christ (Messiah) then you are counted as being great! And you should be living your life with confidence in this truth. My sisters, I challenge you to ask yourself, “Who do you think you are?” And if your thoughts are not God’s thoughts, it is time to standup and do something about that!

Our enemy constantly tries to tell me that it is too late for me. My time has passed. I missed the boat. But I constantly tell him that he is a liar and he is wrong, wrong, wrong!!!! And you know how I can do that? Because I believe what God says about me! At 56 (almost 57) I have a confidence that I have never possessed before, and it is going to take me to great places that I thought I had lost. But I realized (with the help of the Holy Spirit) that God’s Word has not changed and never will. It was my thinking that had veered off into the lane of unbelief.

My dear sisters, I pour my heart out to you on this, because I am living proof of how believing what the Bible says about you will turn your life around. If you’ve been doubting God or your purpose, I want you to stop it right now!! I want you to stop what I call, “Stinking Thinking,” and start thinking like God. Oh yeah, I Corinthian 2:16, tells us that we have the mind of Christ (Messiah), so that means the new creature in us, can think like our Master.

There is one thing though I do want to caution you about. There is a big difference between confidence and pride. Please do not get the two confused. Pride is boastful, vain, self seeking, self edifying and the list goes on. That is not confidence, in fact it is insecurity at its finest. With the confidence of the Lord you don’t have to shout it or talk about it to anyone. They will see on their own that there is something about you, just as I did this weekend in my new friend.

I pray that if you’ve been slouching a bit, that after you have read this, you will hoist the girls up, suck you belly in, throw your shoulders back and walk with a little more confidence than you did yesterday.

I love you my wonderful sisters, and I have been so very encouraged by writing to you today. I’ve wanted to stand up and shout, because I’m so happy with all God is doing in me. I’m learning to be free! And I pray that I am encouraging you along the way too!

We have a winner from last week’s drawing: SJ, from Columbus, OH. SJ, I’m going to contact you via email so that I can have Amazon.com ship your book. May it be a real blessing to you.

Love & Hugs
Ponnie

Love Yourself.....and Then You Can Love Your Neighbor

It is amazing how many times we are told to love our neighbor as we love ourselves! Moses gave it as law and Jesus (Yeshua) gives it to us as a commandment. Matthew 22:36-40 (NIV), 36"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" 37Jesus replied: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38This is the first and greatest commandment. 39And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself. 40All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew, Mark and Luke all recounted Jesus (Yeshua) saying this to the Pharisees and Paul tells us the same thing in Romans and Galatians. And last but not least, James had his say about it too. Wow!! Loving your neighbor as you love yourself went from being one of the many laws in Leviticus 19, to being the second greatest commandment given to man. But what I think many of us have missed is the part that is in between loving God and loving our neighbor. The part that says, “We have to Love Ourselves.”

Before I go any further with this, I want to define neighbor so that we are on the same page. In Luke 10, Jesus (Yeshua) teaches us through the story of the Good Samaritan that all the world are neighbors. This frees us up so that we are not boxed into thinking that this command only applies to the people next door or down the street. It is the person at the checkout, the drive through, the doctor’s office, the nail salon and any of the many places we travel in our daily lives. It is that hard to get along with boss, and back stabbing coworker you dread having to see each day. It really is anyone who comes your way.

Love is the most talked about subject in the Bible. Why? Because God is love and when we sit down and explore God’s love you see that it resembles nothing the world portrays. For one, the world tells you that sex is love. In so many cases, people should just tell each other, “I really lust you!” Instead of, “I love you.” It would be a more truthful and accurate explanation of the emotions they are feeling. The world’s definition of Love is: It’s an emotion or feeling. This is why so many women and children are heartbroken, because men have walked away from their wives, girlfriends and children, because they equate their love on how they feel…Don’t love you anymore, moving on! But God’s LOVE is an action word. God’s LOVE is a commitment. God’s LOVE is never ending. So even if you breakup with the mother of your children you still make sure they are provided for, because you love them and care for them. If your husband walked away from you for another woman, you don’t hold your children hostage and not let them see him. Why? Because you love them and want the best for them. This is God’s LOVE. His LOVE shows you in the hardest of times it will still be there.

One of my favorite translations to read love in is the Amplified Bible. I love it, I love it….I LOVE it!! If you don’t have that translation please go to Biblegateway.com and read I Corinthians 13: 4-8a. It spells out how we are to love others as we walk in the love of our Lord!! But one thing I see in women is that we often have so much baggage from the past that has convinced us that we are not worthy of love, we end up walking through life with an underlying self-hatred. And that is what I want to take a look at today.

Not to long ago I was having a conversation with a woman in her 40’s and she made the statement that she didn’t like women, and she got along much better with men. How very sad. And the reason I’m saying that is because, she is a woman. So what is she really saying? The truth, she really didn’t like herself. How can you not like women, when you are a woman and still like yourself? You can’t. This is a mindset that will also hinder you from loving others (your neighbor).

If you are a person who has came from an abusive background, (especially a constant barrage of verbal abuse and insults), and suffer from low self-esteem…..You are fat! You’re stupid! You’re ugly and no one in the right mind will want you! You’re worthless! You’re useless! You are nothing and you will never be anything! And with each fiery dart that hit your mind and your heart eventually you began to believe all the mean and hurtful words. Is it possible to love others if you still believe the lies that you were told about yourself?

When you were rejected by the man who impregnated you, only to see him marry someone else and build a better life for her and her children (not his children, but her children). How can you love your neighbor when you feel so betrayed and unloved?

Though the bruises and broken bones have healed, and the scars that once ravished your body are no longer visible to the naked eye, and you look okay on the outside, but inside you’re still a broken and battered woman from the beatings and verbal insults you endured for years. How can you love your neighbor when you still hear the words that described you as trash, everyday?

You’ve struggled with your weight since you were a young child. Your teen years were hell as the fat girl! Especially if you grew up in a time where there were no attractive or stylish clothing for plus sized people. You still remember the nasty and cruel names the other kids called you, and how you really didn’t have friends. So your loneliness caused you to eat more, and food became your friend. As a woman you are still overweight and feel unattractive. You might be single, you may be married, but the feelings of low self-esteem still control your life. How are you able to love your neighbor when you don’t love who you are?

As followers of Jesus (Yeshua) and His disciples, how can we love others with the I Corinthians love when we find it so hard to love ourselves? The answer is, “We can’t and we don’t.”

Sisters, it is time to stand up and begin to deal with any issues in our lives that hinder us from loving ourselves and prevent us from seeing the beautiful woman that God does. Back in the 70’s there was a saying “Love Fest” let’s rise up and start having a “Love Fest” with ourselves. The first and most crucial step is that you make the decision right now, that you are lovable and worthy of love. Why? Because that is what God says about you!! And He rules! Not the mirror, not your husband, not your friends, not your family, not what size clothing you wear, not the fashion magazines, not the numbers on the scale, not how many wrinkles or rolls of fat you have. What God says about us, should be all that matters.

Once you make the decision that you are who God says you are, then the next step is to search out the scriptures that will help change your heart so that you begin to believe it!! You might only need one verse that speaks to your heart to start with. If you are a person that grew up hearing how stupid you were and you find yourself repeating those words to yourself every time you make a mistake, then it is time to remember that the Bible says, “You have the mind of Christ.” So it is impossible for you to be stupid. If the tapes that you are worthless continue to play in your mind, then you should look where it says, “We sit in heavenly places with Christ Jesus.” That is a place that does not belong to everyone and for those of us that have been given that position through His precious blood; we can hardly be counted as worthless.

Do you suffer with feelings of being unloved and unlovable and even question God’s love for you? If so meditate on Jeremiah 31:3, “I have loved you with an everlasting love, therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn you.” What exactly does that mean? Search it out in the Bible until you see just what God’s everlasting love is and how it pertains to you. The One who shed the Blood that you were bought with is a good place to start.

Are you one that has low self-esteem because of your weight? Then start to say each day to yourself as you are getting dressed, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made!” Because that is what Psalm 139:14 says about you. I wish that I could give each of you a boost of the scripture that would help you to see the exact image you are in Christ (Yeshua), but it will go far better if you allow the Holy Spirit of God to show you through His Word exactly what you need. But the truth is that once you began to apply God’s version of who you are to yourself, you will also begin to see that His love and mercy is for all. And that’s the key as to how you can begin to love your neighbor as you love yourself. ~Smile~

Today is as good as any to start the journey of loving yourself more. There might be some tears shed as you look at those things that have kept you from understanding what it really means to be a new creature in our Lord. In many cases you are going to have to dish out big doses of forgiveness, so that you will no longer live in the prison of past hurts. But I can tell you from my own messed up life, that the healing power of the Blood of Jesus (Yeshua) is absolutely wonderful! It really does not matter how horrid a life you have had, you can be healed, you can forgive and you can be made whole, if you desire to be so.

My dear wonderful sisters, I pray that I have moved you to grab onto the Truths of who you really are as the Daughter of the Most High God!!! The position that you have in His Kingdom is far greater than anything this world can fathom or even attempt to offer you!! You are Blessed and highly favored, by the King of kings. You are the apple of a Father’s eye, which never sleeps and while you are sleeping He is thinking about and caring for you! Everything I just wrote is in the Bible; it’s all true because God’s Word says so. You are loved with a love that never fails!!

I want to offer the book “Beauty for Ashes” by Joyce Meyer, in a drawing this week. It is her story of how her father sexually abused her. But the greatest thing about it all is how God’s saving grace and wonderful love took that horrible pile of ashes (her life) and turned it into a thing of great beauty. If she could come to the place to forgive her father and mother for years of abuse, I feel no matter what has happened to you, you will be inspired by her testimony to let go and live.

My prayer for you today is that you have been inspired to believe God and what He says. You might have personally needed to read today’s blog or you might know someone who can benefit from what I have been inspired to write. If that is the case please pass this on to them, and pray for them.

I love you all dearly and I am always inspired by the words I write. It takes me back to where I have been and reminds me of how very far the Lord has brought me because of His love. I know what it is to be a broken and trashed person, but for God’s great love, my status is now one of Royalty, healed and whole, and that means everything.

To enter this weeks drawing send an email to: hope2win_bloggdrawings99@verizon.net, with your name, city and state. You have until Tuesday, November 10th, 6pm ET, USA to enter.

Blessings and Love to you all.
Ponnie