When Life Isn’t Perfect…..then what?

Recently Tovah and I tried to take that perfect picture of my three grands to use on the cover of a photo album the middle one bought her mother for Christmas. As you can see in the photo I posted, is far from perfect. Just as Tovah was about to snap the picture, one of our cats decided to run down the stairs and see what was going on which triggered the baby closing her eyes and the cat being in the photo. We did get a really nice one for the cover, but as I pursed them to pick just the right one, I couldn’t help but be inspired by this photo. It reminds me of how we try to orchestrate perfect lives and how in an instant it can all fall apart. And when that happens….then what?

The “Then what?” really translates to, “How do we respond, how do we handle things, or how we really perceive them to be?” How many of us have experienced trying to get that perfect baby photo or family snapshot? Probably all of us at one point or another, so we know that it can be a nightmare (especially with a cranky or crying baby) or it can be fun with a happy ending. It is a lot like life can be….moments of joy that we wish we could hold onto forever, or seasons of disappointments and trials that seem to go on forever.

With the end of our current year quickly upon us, I’m sure that many of us are looking ahead for what we would like to see happen in 2009. I have been looking at the goals I set on January 4th, my 55th birthday. And at first I was a little disappointed as I viewed my list, until the Holy Spirit had a word with me. He was quick to point out just how many things I had accomplished and the many ways the Lord had blessed me on an every day bases.

I wanted to celebrate my birthday every month in the year 2008 by doing something special. I wanted to do things like go to the movies every month if there was something I wanted to see, have lunch with friends once a month, buy myself a mp3 player, have a makeup party, etc., etc. Hum, I still don’t have that mp3 player, didn’t have a party and there were a couple of movies I wanted to see this past year that came and went before I got to see them. He showed me that though I may not have gotten to see those movies when I desired, there wasn’t one day of this year that I did not have eyes to see. I may not have the mp3 I wanted so I could listen to music as I walked in the mornings, but He reminded me of all the mornings I had a song in my heart and used my walking time to talk to God. And as far as the party goes, if I hadn’t wanted it to be a set way I probably could have had one. As I began to look at my list of goals through the eyes of our Comforter, I could see that my year had been one of great measure.

Of course with 56 on the way, I am setting new goals and transferring some from this year that I want to continue to work on. But one big difference from this time last year is that I’m not trying to setup things so that I have that perfect picture. Just as the picture of my grands is not the perfect picture pose, in the upheaval it turned out to be a great moment of laughter, with a good memory to boot. One thing we often do as women when we conceptually plan or design things, we strive for perfection. The truth is….. there is “No Perfect” in this world other than the love of God for us….

….So my dear sisters, when at first glance the picture does not seem to be perfect, take a second look and see what you missed. You might be pleasantly surprised at what you find.

Please share some of your insights about how to handle life when things aren’t perfect. And how these insights will help you enjoy 2009 in a new and different way.

Love & Hugs
Ponnie
A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.

Worst Week!

I don't know if any of you have seen the comedy show "Worst Week" or not, but to me it is hilarious. The main character is such a klutz, that he even started a fire in the swimming pool on his wedding day. He reminds me a lot of Jerry Lewis. But unlike the show that is laced with laughter and at the end it somehow works out for him, when we have a Worst Week (where everything seems to go wrong) there is little humor to be found. I had one of those weeks, and that is why I used this particular picture of my middle grandchild Christina, I'm sure that's kind of how I must have looked to God for a few days.


There are seasons in our lives when we have to ask "What in the heck is going on? Where did this come from?" Especially when the unexpected happens. Sunday morning I got up feeling really good after spending Saturday at a "Kids EE" clinic at a Chinese church outside of Philadelphia. Tovah and I got to spend time with a friend that we have not seen in 4 years and the focus of preaching the Good News was just what I needed. We both came home happy and content. Tovah stayed home Sunday to do schoolwork, and I went to Sunday school. And right after Sunday school and just before service started that is when all hell broke loose. I won't go into too much detail because if you want to get over a wrong or injustice done to you, talking about it only keeps it fresh in your mind and in your heart....so lets just say that a sister-in-the-Lord, was an easy instrument for our enemy to use against me. And since she was such an easy mark, it was pretty bad. In fact when I left after service I told my pastor, "I’m not ever coming back to this place!" Of course we all know that saying, "Never or Not Ever" is the biggest setup to make you a liar. ~Smile~

It took a couple of days for me to even begin to hear God or anyone else. I needed time to lick my wounds and feel sorry for myself. I'm sure in those two days as the Holy Spirit was quietly speaking to me; I looked a lot like Tina in her picture. Whinny, cause things weren't going my way. But praise God for His great love for us, because Tuesday morning during my morning walk, He spoke gently to my heart in a way that helped me to really begin the process of forgiveness and healing. He told me to remember that no weapon formed against me shall prosper, no matter who it is. His words made me feel better not because of what I would like Him to do to that sister, but they reminded me that He was there and had seen and heard it all. The battle is not mine, but His.....if I allow Him to handle it.

Though I had taken all this to the Cross and laid it at the feet of Jesus, I still felt a cloud over me. Because of all the commotion my co-chair and I thought it was best to cancel our Women's Breakfast for this coming Saturday, and though it was the right thing to do, there was no joy in the cancellation. So, I could feel the spirit of sadness lingering, trying to make this a Worst Week for me. A week where I just can't wait for it to be over. But we serve the most awesome God, and He knew just what I needed and I would like to share with you an email I received yesterday. And this person had no idea what this week had been for me.

"The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings."-Eric Hoffer
According to legend, a young man while roaming the desert came across a spring of delicious crystal-clear water. The water was so sweet he filled his leather canteen so he could bring some back to a tribal elder who had been his teacher. After a four-day journey he presented the water to the old man who took a deep drink, smiled warmly and thanked his student lavishly for the sweet water. The young man returned to his village with a happy heart.

Later, the teacher let another student taste the water. He spat it out, saying it was awful. It apparently had become stale because of the old leather container. The student challenged his teacher: "Master, the water was foul. Why did you pretend to like it?"The teacher replied, "You only tasted the water. I tasted the gift. The water was simply the container for an act of living-kindness and nothing could be sweeter."

Self-motivation without gratitude is impossible. Our energy is "sapped" when our entire focus is on what's wrong instead of what is right with our lives. One of our greatest challenges is to live and love in spite of pain and disappointment...to find gratitude in the midst of it all.

Reflect for a moment on this beautiful quote from Melody Beattie:
"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.

After reading this I could see with a clear heart that I had nothing to really be sad about, but so very much to be grateful for. So I began to speak words of Gratitude to our Father, for all that He has done for me and my family and the spirit of sadness had to leave.

Because of the Christmas hustle and bustle, we are often consumed with our own plans and agendas without realizing that maybe someone we know and love could be having a Worst Week and really needs an encouraging word from us to push them on. If you are experiencing a Worst Week, sit down and write at least 30 things you have to be grateful for. Trust me; it will take your mind off of whatever is dictating your Worst Week. And if you know someone who is in the midst of a Worst Week, encourage them as the Lord has encouraged you.

My pastor and I had a long talk, (I am blessed because he loves the Lord) and girls I just want to remind you to "Never" say, "Never”...guess where I'll be Sunday morning, God willing? Yup, in church looking at my pastor and friends. As tomorrow ends this week and Sunday starts a new one, may you find peace of heart and peace of mind in all that Jesus has done and continues to do for you at the Throne of Grace.

I would like you to feel free to share some of your "Worst Weeks" and how you got through them. Please share.....after all this is a blog.

Love and hugs.
Ponnie
A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.

How to Experience Holiday Laughter & Joy!

Hello Great Women of God!!!

Oh my, the Holiday rush is upon us. With Thanksgiving coming so late in November it seems to have short changed us on time to do everything on our list. NOT!!! Let's help each other have a wonderful holiday by sharing the ways we can scale things back and still have a wonderful Christmas or Hanukkah celebration.

Patsy Clairmont posted this on her blog last week and I wanted so much to share this with you:

Here’s mine. I call it my Too-Too Plan…one size fits all......by Patsy Clairmont
Don’t spend too much. Guard against unnecessary “bargains.” (Lists help) Debt depresses.
Don’t do too much. Holiday exhaustion leads to pity party’s and who needs anymore events to attend?
Don’t eat too much. One stuffed turkey is enough.
Don’t set expectations too high. Expectations lead to drama and life gives us enough of that without whiny curtain calls.

Remember you can never be too grateful. Here’s where a list really helps. It gives us deliberate focus, which directs our minds to a higher place. Gratitude protects our health, our hearts, our homes, and our conversations.... http://www.patsyclairmont-blog.com/

My dear sisters, I want to encourage you to stress down for the upcoming days and come up with ways to enjoy family and friends without spending monies you really don't have, and putting expectations on yourself and your family that will only cause you heartache.

Tovah (my youngest daughter) has never been allowed to ask for any gifts for Christmas. By the time she came along I was wise enough to be out of the world system and in God's Kingdom, so I always made Christmas a focus on the celebration of our Savior's birth. We have done many different things over the years such as, adopting a young mom and her baby that lived in a shelter, doing boxes for the "Samaritans Purse, hosting Christmas Eve dinners for singles, but basically just using the premise of giving to Yeshua Jesus. She is a teen now and knows that we are to give in His honor every day and not wait for one particular time of year to do that which is a command for our daily lives, but now I had the challenge of still not allowing her to get caught up in the current that runs wild this time of year. So our solution to her having fun and being with her friends was a cookie party. We did it for the first time last year and it was such a big hit with her and her friends that we are doing it again.

There is more than one way of making cookies the focus of a great time. Tovah and I make the cookie dough a couple of days before the party and her friends bring cookie cutters and extra cookie sheets. Last year two of the girls even brought cookie dough. The girls have a ball baking and decorating dozens and dozens of cookies. Then we order pizza and everyone gets to pick what they want on their half (that made for some interesting combinations) and they sit around laughing and talking and everyone gets to take home a large tray of cookies at the end of the evening. The best part for her is that one of her seven guests gets to spend the night and the next day we go downtown to the Christmas light show at Macy's and hangout and have lunch. This year, I will be leaving them after the light show so that they can have fun by themselves. It is simple, yet so much fun for Tovah and her friends.

With younger children you can bake the cookies before hand and just have a cookie decorating party that is 2 hrs long and send everyone home with a nice plate of cookies.

Hosting a cookie exchange is a great social event for women. The host supplies beverages and dip, and all the guest bring cookies, cookies, cookies, and everyone swaps cookies to take home. You can bake them, or buy them by the pound from your neighborhood bakery. Either way it's a fun time to get together and its not a lot of work for anyone.

Yummm, I'm getting hungry just thinking about homemade cookies and how great the house smells when they are baking!

Share with me some of the things you have come up with that are fun get togethers that don't take a lot of effort to coordinate and won't hurt the budget. With money being tight for many, lets share our ideas for good family and friend times that will boost us spiritually. There is nothing like sitting around with those you love, laughing and having a good time.

Love & Hugs
Ponnie

What Does Christmas Really Mean To You?

Today is the infamous "Black Friday" a day where retailers used to find themselves in the black versus the red. But starting about 10 years ago, in order to try and insure better holiday sales, stores started being open on Thanksgiving Day and as early as 7am on Black Friday. Over the past few years I have watched as the openings became as early as 6am on Thanksgiving and 5am on Black Friday. But today some stores opened at 4am! And what is more amzaing is the fact that people stared lining up at midnight. Phew, now what has that got to do with the celebration of the birth of our Savior?

At the Walmart in South Philadelphia they needed a police presence to keep the 2,000 or so people (who had lined up for the 5am opening) orderly. At first they were running each other over with shopping carts, until the police brought order. Running to buy flat screen TV's and computers really doesn't seem to do much to enhance the fact that Christ was born so that He could die unless you are buying the flat screen for a shelter for homeless people or a children's home. Same goes for the computers. The truth is, this stuff goes on sale more than once a year and the best buys are not just at Christmas time.

What has happened to us as Believers? Why have we forgotten that a birthday celebration usually mean gifts for the one whose birthday is being celebrated? How much of our budget is spent on giving to Christ as Matthew 25:36-40, tell us. What are we teaching our children? Are we teaching them to think of others and their needs? Or are we teaching them to spend money they don't have? What about adopting the practice of exchanging gifts? By the way, is it still a gift if you exchange tit-for-tat? Are they watching us buy gifts out of obligation because someone gave us something and we feel we have to return the favor? I want you to consider something.....If Jesus should tarry, what will Christmas look like for your children as adults with children of their own based on what they have learned from us? Will it be one where they use this time to bring honor to God by living Matthew 25:36-40, or one where they are so stressed out from being stuck in traditions that are nothing but burdensome?

As a Christian tell me what Christmas really means to you. I want to be inspired by my sisters and brothers. I need to know that the world has not been successful in redefining the meaning of Christmas for us!

Blessings,

Ponnie

A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.